


Catatonic

by Lastsyns



Category: Doctor Who
Genre: Healing, Injury Recovery, Panic Attacks, Past Rape/Non-con, Rape Recovery, Recovery, Suicide Attempt, vegetative state
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-04
Updated: 2015-04-02
Packaged: 2018-03-05 07:39:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 60,054
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3111554
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lastsyns/pseuds/Lastsyns
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the events of Canary Warf the Doctor is attacked leaving him in a vegetative like state. With time and patients Jack hopes that one day he can bring the Doctor back.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

"There you go Doctor," Jack stated as he fixed the brown hair so that it was spiked the way this Doctor preferred. He could never imagine the old Doctor with spiky hair but with this one it worked. "What do you think we should do today? I was thinking a nice walk out to the pier so that you can see the sun." Jack offered. The Doctor didn't answer. He never answered, but Jack never gave up hope. Gently he lifted the Doctor out of his bed and placed him in his wheelchair.

It had been two years since he had found the Doctor again and Jack had taken care of him every day. He could have taken the Doctor to a facility that was better able to handle caring for a catatonic patient, but Jack felt as though he owed the Time Lord. Not only had the Doctor once been his friend, it was at the hands of Jack's own boyfriend that the Doctor had become like this.

Everyone had lost someone during the battle of Canary Warf, and some people lost more than others. Jack had been in Cardiff at the time the battle started working on setting up Torchwood three. He had been informed by his boyfriend Ianto that the Doctor had shown up to Torchwood one. Eager to see him again, Jack had dropped everything and drove up to London. By the time he got there though, his hope for a happy reunion was gone. The cyberman had decimated the building killing hundreds before the Doctor had managed to send them back into the void.

From the footage Jack had been able to gather, he saw what happened to Rose. He watched in the same horror as the Doctor as she flew towards the void. He couldn't see what happened to her from there but he saw the footage of after the rift had closed and the Doctor had walked slowly towards the wall. It was then the cameras had cut out. That day Jack had been sure he missed his opportunity to see the Doctor. He had gone room to room looking for survivors and helping those who needed it. It was as he entered the room where they kept the shuttles he realized the Doctor was still there. The Police Box sat in the corner of the room, her light flashing. He had rushed to it only to find her empty.

Realizing the Doctor wouldn't have gone far without her, he continued his search. It was in the same room that Rose had been lost, that Jack finally found him. Jack hadn't recognized him at first. It wasn't because he had changed, no, Jack had seen what the Doctor looked like from the footage of the sycorax attack. It was because the man laying in the room had been brutally beaten. His face was a mess of black and blue bruises. His trousers were missing and he was bleeding. The man was still breathing and as Jack stared to help him he had figured out it was the Doctor. Almost immediately he was sick on the floor, as he wondered who could have hurt him in such a way. After everything the Doctor had did for them, he was abused and discarded like trash.

Jack had carried him to the TARDIS and taken him straight to the medi-bay. He had cleaned the Doctor up and tested the Doctor to find out who had hurt him. The news that it was Ianto had sent Jack into an uncontrolled rage. Ianto still resided in the Torchwood three cells and Jack had informed him that he would let him out only when the Doctor was himself again. Back then though he had promised to leave Ianto in the cells until he rotted. He didn't understand why Ianto had hurt the Doctor. Even if he was jealous, Jack had been happy with Ianto and wasn't planning on leaving him for the Doctor. Ianto though had insured that was exactly what happened.

It had taken almost a week before the Doctor had woken up. When he did though it was immediately obvious something was wrong. He only opened his eyes, he didn't move, didn't speak, didn't do anything really but stare forward, lost in his own mind. Jack had vowed that he would break the Doctor out of it, but as time went on that seemed less and less likely. He wasn't going to give up on the Doctor though. Somewhere in the unresponsive body was the beautiful mind that Jack had once known. He just had to find a way to help him back.

-DW-

The Doctor's life had never been routine in his first nine hundred years of life. He had always done what he wanted, when he wanted and only slowed down when his companions would beg him for a minute to rest. He had pushed Jack and Rose to almost breaking on more then one occasion before Rose would flirt with him, asking him for just a minute to sleep. The Doctor would smile at her and offer to tuck her in. It had started as a joke between them until one day she took him up on the offer. Every night from then on he would follow her to bed and talk to her until she fell asleep.

"You never did tell me what you two would talk about," Jack told the Doctor softly. He tried not to let his sadness show through as he realized how much he missed that smile. How much he missed everything that the Time Lord use to be. Those days of chaos were gone to a life of routine, because routine kept the Doctor healthy.

Jack's days started all the same now. No matter how much or how little he slept he was up at five in the morning to take care of the Doctor. The Doctor was usually awake by the time he went into get him but if not he always woke shortly after. From there Jack would gently clean him up and bathe him before moving him into his wheelchair. He would then feed the Doctor in the privacy of his room before the others arrived to work. The Doctor thankfully was still able to swallow soft foods and so Jack took the time to spoon feed him properly rather then force feed him through a tube. He wasn't sure how much the Doctor was comprehending but Jack always made sure to take great care in not embarrassing him.

Occasionally the Doctor's hand would move or his eyes would glance to Jack just for a moment. The first time it had happened Jack had jumped for joy sure the Doctor was coming back to him. After tons of research though and the two years, he had come to realize the movements didn't mean anything. So when the Doctor glanced at him as he brought the spoonful of oatmeal to his mouth, Jack barely took notice.

"You have a busy day today. Martha is going to be coming in to do your stretches and then you are going to spend time with Gwen while I go out in the field for a while. I told Gwen that she is to go over the artifacts that came through the rift recently with you," Jack informed him. If he had anything to be thankful for the last two years it was Martha and Gwen.

Martha technically belonged to UNIT but the brigadier was more than willing to send her twice a week to Torchwood to work with the Doctor. Jack had been hesitant to accept her help at first but after meeting Martha, he realized she was exactly the kind of companion the Doctor would have like. She was brave, inquisitive and had taken to learning about the Doctor and adapting her work in order to help his unique physiology. Jack was just disappointed that UNIT had gotten to her first after the Judoon had taken Royal Hope hospital. It was thanks to Martha that the hospital had been returned safely to Earth and UNIT had employed her the very next day.

Gwen though had shown up by accident. She had found Torchwood. At first Jack had tried to retcon her but she came back. After he had let her stay. She had been one of the best things to happen to Torchwood. She didn't mind taking care of the Doctor while Jack went into the field and Jack quickly discovered that is what he needed. He had spent the first three months taking care of the Doctor with his life revolving around the Time Lord. Now thanks to Gwen he was able to step back a little and have time to himself without feeling to guilty.

Jack finished feeding the Doctor and then gave him a small drink of water. Releasing the breaks on the wheel chair. He pushed the Doctor out into the hub. Gwen was there early like usual and she looked up as they entered.

"You're looking nice today," She commented to the Doctor as Jack approached. "I think you need a haircut though."

"His hair is fine," Jack told her as he ran his hand through it. He liked the Doctor's hair the way that it was. "Would you mind staying with him while I take Ianto his breakfast?"

"Of course not. Do you want me to take it instead?" Gwen offered. It was a usual offer and somedays Jack took her up on it. Today though he wanted to go himself. He made Ianto a simple breakfast of toast with butter before heading down to the cells. He took the meal to the third cell down and pushed it roughly through the hole in the cell.

"I think I will skip breakfast today?" Ianto commented as the food fell to the floor. He had long ago stopped complaining about how he was treated. He had complained once before Jack had informed him that the world thought Ianto had died with the rest and Jack would be more than happy to finish the job.

"Your loss," Jack answered as he turned to leave. He returned to the Doctor and Gwen.

"Does he feel a little warm to you?" Gwen asked as she placed her hand on the Doctor's cheek. Jack followed suit and held it there for a moment.

"A little but not to much. I will have Martha check him when she comes in later," Jack informed her. He was sure it was nothing.


	2. Chapter 2

The Doctor lay curled up alone on the captain's chair in the TARDIS. He didn't know how long he had been on board and that should have bothered him but it didn't. There was little that bothered him anymore and less then that made sense. One of the things that made the least sense is the TARDIS had lost all of her power, refusing to move and every room had sealed off except for the console room. The console room was bathed in emergency lighting and he was cold despite the fact he had his coat draped over him like a blanket. He couldn't feel her in properly in the darkened room but he could hear her humming at him from outside the doors. She was beckoning him to step off the TARDIS. He didn't understand why though.

Outside the doors he knew that the man still waited. The man had no face yet he still filled his dreams with horror and made it impossible for him to stay asleep long. The man had yelled at him about the fact he had once traveled with Jack. Blamed him for the fact that Jack had loved him, not understanding that was the way Jack was. He wasn't sure how he managed to get away as the man hit him and wrapped his hands around his neck. He had been fighting the man one moment and the next he had gotten away running for his life to the TARDIS. There was a part of his mind that kept telling him he hadn't escaped. That part had to be wrong though, he was here safe in his TARDIS.

Sometimes he thought for just a moment that he could see Jack and others. Jack though was the main one who came to him. Sometimes Jack was just sitting near him talking, though he never understood the words. Other times he would see him standing in front of him brushing his hair, or smiling at him as he looked down. The Doctor was even embarrassed to find that sometimes he thought of Jack giving him a bath. Jack always looked sad when he saw him, though he would force a smile on his face as he talked. If he concentrated hard enough he would feel the uniqueness that was Jack for just a moment, before he was once again in the darkened console room alone.

-DW-

Martha arrived to the hub a little after eight in the morning. She smiled at them as she made her way in, carrying her doctor's bag as normal. Even though the hub had all the supplies she might need, she always had the bag with her and Jack had long since given up on trying to figure out why.

"Good morning Jack. Good morning Doctor," she greeted them as she entered the medical room for the Doctor's twice weekly evaluation.

"Right on time," Jack told her. He gently lifted the Doctor in his arms and sat him down on the examination table for Martha. She walked over to the sink and washed her hands before pulling on a pair of gloves.

"You're looking well today Doctor," She told him as she approached. Jack smiled, it was one of the reasons he liked Martha. He had always made sure to talk to the Doctor and try to engage him in the conversation even if the Time Lord never answered. He didn't know how much the Doctor could hear and he didn't want the Doctor to ever become bored if he was actually understanding. He also wanted to give the Doctor something to grasp on to if he was using their voices as a way back. He never had to explain that to Martha though as she talked to the Doctor from the start.

Martha ran through the normal examination. She checked his eyes, ears, lungs and hearts. Everything was the same as usual and she checked them off on her list. It was when she took his temperature that the differences began.

"Your temperature has gone up a little," She informed the Doctor.

"Gwen and I noticed that too. I checked him this morning though and he has no sores or anything that could be causing the change," Jack explained to her.

"Has anyone been sick lately?" Martha asked.

"Owen had a cold about two weeks ago," Jack answered her. She nodded and notated the temperature change. "He hasn't shown any signs of a cold though besides the slight fever."

"I am going to take a little bit of blood just to be sure. If he does have an illness we need to catch it as soon as possible," Martha told Jack directly. She went to the cupboard and pulled out a syringe along with two vials. Sitting back in front of the Doctor she found the vein in his arm. "Sharp prick," She warned before carefully inserting the needle.

For just a moment she could feel him watching her. It wasn't the first time that his eyes had looked at her as she went about her routine, but it was the first time that she had ever felt that he knew what was going on. She also knew that was impossible. The Doctor had been in the vegetative state for about two years now and she had been his doctor almost the entire time. She hadn't been an expert on caring for a catatonic Time Lord when it began but she had studied all the books Jack had given her about him and all the case material she could find about vegetative patients. Though the Doctor didn't fit all of the normal criteria because he wasn't human he still fit enough to be considered vegetative. Still she had felt his eyes clearly.

She didn't mention to Jack though or write it down. She didn't want to get his hopes up. She knew how much he had gone through to keep the Doctor alive the last two years. She had one point tried to discuss long term care outside of Torchwood and Jack had put his foot down. The Doctor could live thousands of years and there was no one better equipped to take care of him then Jack. Jack would put his life on hold for however long he needed to in order to care for his friend. A few thousand years would only be a blink of an eye for him and he wanted to spend it with the Time Lord.

"What is it?" Jack questioned as Martha went still for just a moment.

"Nothing. I was just thinking I don't need the second vial after all. One will be enough for the test I want to run," She answered. She finished filling the vial and then withdrew the needle from the Doctor's arm. She placed a plaster over the needle wound. Standing up she took his foot in her hand. Lifting his leg she carefully began the specialized stretches that she did with him. Jack was still watching her as she worked. She could tell he was considering her words but didn't know if he believed her. A moan from the Doctor as she stretched his leg though, turned his attention back to him.

"I know Doctor, but it is for the best. She just wants to make sure you can still run," Jack reassured him. He gently stroked the Doctor's head as Martha continued. Moans and groans from the Doctor meant almost as little as the hand twitches and eye movement. That didn't stop Jack from trying to comfort the Doctor though as Martha continued. It didn't matter if the Doctor knew he was there or not. Nothing was going to stop Jack from comforting the Doctor if he needed it.

-DW-

During the first few days after the Doctor had been attacked, Jack could do little but sit next to him. He couldn't even bring himself to go arrest Ianto, after the DNA sample revealed it was him who had brutally hurt the Doctor. He had felt numb as he had picked up the phone and called his team to arrest the man he had once considered a lover. He felt to sick to tell them the horrible things Ianto had did to the man Jack had considered a friend. He couldn't even wrap his mind around the fact that it was his calm Ianto who had did it.

Though as the truth came to light that Ianto had been jealous of the Doctor, Jack had given up on love. By then a week had passed and the Doctor had opened his eyes to reveal that even though his hearts still beat his mind was gone. At that moment Jack decided that he would stay by the Doctor day and night until the Doctor returned to him and he had kept that promise for three months as the Doctor's body had healed. It was when Martha was introduced as the Doctor's doctor that he was finally asked the one question that made him stop a moment.

"How are you doing, Jack?" She had asked innocently as she looked over the Doctor's charts for the first time. She wasn't the first one who had shown concern over his well being since his return to Torchwood just over two months before hand. Before that he had been on the TARDIS alone with the Doctor but when it became obvious that he was going to continue to need long term care, Jack had taken him back to what he considered home. His team had asked how the Doctor was doing and how he was, but they sounded as though they pitied him. Martha was the first one who had asked and he felt as though she was genuinely concerned.

It was then that he realized that though he was alive, he felt dead on the inside. All of his love for life had gone with the Doctor and Ianto. He awoke every day and made sure that the Doctor was bathed, dressed, fed and presentable but his own clothes were getting ratty and he couldn't remember the last time he ate. It would still be about two weeks later before he got a few hours to himself again but he made sure from then on that he took a moment to take care of himself as well. He also took Martha's advice and whenever he fed the Doctor he made sure to eat something as well.

"I brought you banana pudding for lunch," Jack told the Doctor happily as he sat down in front of him. He tended to spoil the Doctor on days where he had his examinations. For himself he had just a sandwich with a bag of crisp. Picking up the spoon he began the task of feeding the Doctor as he ate his own meal. Depending on how well the Doctor cooperated they would normally finish about the same time. Today though the Doctor kept his mouth shut between bites of food and Jack finished his own meal long before the Doctor. Jack fed him the last bite and then reached out to brush his hair aside.

"What is the matter Doctor? Are you not feeling well today?" Jack asked him in concern. It wasn't the first time Jack had difficulty feeding him, but taking the temperature into account, he worried the Doctor was sick. He hoped that Martha got the blood test done quickly so they could get him on antibiotics if necessary. Knowing the Brigadier the blood test would be rushed as much as possible so Jack wouldn't have to wait long. The Brigadier missed his friend just as much as Jack did. He had even gotten Jack in contact with Sarah Jane in order to assist in providing the Doctor care. Though Jack had declined, Sarah Jane sill came to visit when she could and more then once Jack had taken the Doctor to the UNIT base to see the Brigadier.

"I know you were looking forward to it, but we will go down to the pier tomorrow, after Martha has confirmed whether or not you need antibiotics," Jack informed the Doctor. He thought about canceling his time out in the field as well but he knew Gwen would just think he was being silly. Releasing the breaks from the Doctor's chair, he took him out to Gwen so that he could get ready.

-DW-

The Doctor stood at the door of the TARDIS with one hand on the handle. He couldn't bring himself to open the door though. In fact the thought of opening the door was causing him to panic. Letting go he moved away quickly to the console hitting it.

"We have to get out of here," He yelled at her. Dropping to his knees he tried to remove the panel in order to get to her controls. A sharp pain went through his arm and for just a moment he could see a young woman inserting a needle to his arm. He pulled back from the panel and cried out grabbing his arm. Quickly rolling up his sleeve he saw no marks, but he could still clearly feel the needle. He began to breathe heavily as he looked for somewhere he could go. There was no where he could run though in the console room, except for out the doors. He went back to them and grabbed the handle again. He just needed to open the doors like he had done thousands of times in the past. It took little or no courage for him to step out onto a new surface.

He could hear the TARDIS humming louder and he pressed his ear to the door. She was humming a sad tune, still begging him to come out of the TARDIS. He couldn't pull the door open though. Opening it would put him into danger. He looked behind him for a moment and stared longingly at the sealed off corridors. If he could only get to them he would have room to run and plenty of places to hide if he needed to. Though he was safe here in the control room, he still was afraid the man could get to him eventually. Releasing the door once more, he returned to the captain's chair and curled up on it once more.

He was exhausted and cold. Maybe when he woke up again he would be able to open the door. For now though he just needed to sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

The Doctor awoke from his nap feeling cold still but braver then when he had gone to sleep. He stood up and stretched his sore body. Wrapping his coat tightly around himself, he headed towards the door once more. Placing his ear on the door he listened again for any sign that the man was out there still. He couldn't hear the man though. He just heard the TARDIS calling out to him. He closed his eyes as he leaned against the door, listening to her song.

As he concentrated on her song, he could also feel Jack. If Jack was out there, Jack would protect him from the man who was trying to hurt him. He trusted Jack completely even if Jack did feel wrong to his Time Lord senses now. Taking a deep breath he placed his hand on the door handle and before he could stop himself he pulled the door open a crack.

Standing in the doorway he looked out into an unfamiliar room. The TARDIS sang louder to him. In her song he could hear her begging him to leave the comfort of the control room. All he had to do was step forward and he would no longer be cold or alone. He wasn't ready to yet and so instead he watched.

-DW-

Jack was all ready to go out in to the field when the Doctor fell asleep. That wasn't normal behavior for him and Jack added it on to his list of worries. He took the Doctor back to his room in the hub. Carefully he changed him into his pajamas and then tucked him into bed. The Doctor looked peaceful as he slept and for just a moment Jack wanted to pretend that the Doctor would wake up and complain for a cup of tea.

"Sleep well," Jack whispered as he left the room. Once outside of it he pulled out his phone and called Martha.

"Is something wrong Jack?" Martha answered as she picked up. It was unusual for Jack to be calling her.

"He just fell asleep in the middle of the day and he still feels warm. Any news from the blood results yet?" Jack asked hopefully.

"I just stepped back into UNIT. I haven't had a chance to analyze his blood yet but I will put a rush on it. I will also call you as soon as I know anything," Martha promised. "In the mean time just keep him comfortable as normal. If he wants to sleep let him."

"I will," Jack responded. He hung up the phone feeling frustrated but there was little he could do. He had to be patient and wait for the blood work to come back. He just had to find something to distract himself until the Doctor woke up again or Martha called. He was too worried though and he found himself returning to the Doctor's room every few minutes just to make sure he was still breathing.

"Did you have a nice kip?" He asked cheerfully as he entered the Doctor's room to find that the Doctor's eyes were finally open. Jack pulled out a fresh pair of pajamas and went to start a bath for the Doctor. If the Doctor wasn't feeling well as nice bath would at least help him cool down a little. Jack was so busy with his routine that he didn't notice that the Doctor's eyes were following him. He returned to the Doctor's bed and pulled the blankets down.

"I am going to give you a nice bath and then we can have a late dinner since you slept past your normal dinner time," Jack informed him as he sat the Doctor up and removed his nightshirt. He then helped the Doctor out of his trousers, being careful of the catheter line before taking him to the bath. He gently lowered him into the water, helping him to sit up as he did. "There now doesn't that feel good?"

Reaching for the wash cloth, he noticed the Doctor's eyes were looking right at him. He smiled as he began to clean the Doctor. He carefully washed his chest and arms before moving to his legs. Skipping his groin he leaned the Doctor forward a little to get his back. As he did so the Doctor groaned.

"Sorry, I am almost done," Jack reassured him. He finished washing his back and then sat him up straight again. The Doctor's eyes were still watching him. Jack watched him back waiting for the Doctor to turn away. He let the water out of the tub and carried the Doctor back to his room. He laid him down on a towel on the bed to dry him. As he did he watched the Doctor's face and he noticed that the Doctor was watching him. He moved to the other side of the bed and the Doctor's eyes followed.

"Doctor can you hear me?" Jack asked. The Doctor didn't respond though as he continued to stare at Jack. "Doctor, you are safe. Just come back to me," Jack begged him. He finished drying the Doctor off, making sure that he was completely dry before dressing him in his pajamas. Picking him up he carefully put him in his wheelchair and then pushed him out into the hub.

"Gwen?" He called out knowing she should still be there. Sure enough she came out of the kitchen after a minute.

"What is it Jack?" She questioned.

"Watch his eyes," Jack told her excitedly. He began to move around the Doctor slowly. The Doctor's eyes never left him the entire time. Gwen gasped.

"Is he aware?" She wondered as she moved closer. Jack smiled relieved it wasn't just his imagination.

"I don't think so but he is finally coming back," Jack exclaimed.

-DW-

Jack had nightmares almost his entire life. They had all started when his small village was attacked. His father had been killed and his brother had been taken from him. They didn't know if Gray was still alive as he never did find out what happened to his brother. It bothered him day and night for most of his life. When he was younger he hoped that Gray had learned to accept his new life, as he got older though the delusions of childhood faded. He had learned how horrible people could be to each other and he would have nightmares of Gray being tortured in front of him. No matter how much he aged though, Gray was always the same age as when he last saw him.

He had nightmares about the Daleks on the Game station and the people with the gas mask for faces. He tossed and turned, screaming in his sleep as he was killed over and over again just because someone had found out he was immortal. Then after Ianto attacked the Doctor, he had dreams where the Doctor was calling to him for help but no matter how fast he ran, he couldn't stop what was happening. He had tried everything to have a dreamless sleep. He had tried drinking until he passed out, sleeping pills, morphine and other drugs that he came across. Nothing stopped the nightmares. Nothing helped him.

So when he woke up in the morning, feeling refreshed after sleeping for a change he was surprised. He lay basking in the fact that he had actually slept peacefully. In his dreams he had been walking the streets of Cardiff with the Doctor. The Doctor had been happily explaining to Jack about the different species that lived in the city. Not just animal species but alien species. Jack had hugged him, just happy that he had his friend back. As the dream faded and the cold reality that the Doctor was still just the shell of the man he had been returned, tears filled Jack's eyes. He wanted to return to the dream but it was almost time to go and get the Doctor out of bed. To return to being caregiver. Rolling out of bed, he headed to the shower.

-DW-

"You've been sleepy," Jack told the Doctor as he went into check on him. It was all ready going on three hours past the time he normally was awake. The Doctor though had been sleeping contently and so following Martha's instructions, Jack had let him. Now though The Doctor was awake and looking directly at him. Jack couldn't help the smile that crossed his face. Just the fact that the Doctor was noticing he was around was enough to make the last two years of struggle worth it. He had read enough though to know this was only the beginning of the Doctor's recovery and it would take more time and patience to get him back. The Doctor had little milestones to meet before he would be back to normal, if he ever managed to reach them. And so even if he had dreams of walking into the room to find the Doctor sitting up and talking to him again, it could be years before that actually happened.

"Let's get you dressed. Martha is going to be here shortly to check on your progress. You slept in today so we are going to have breakfast after Martha leaves," Jack informed him as he pulled the blankets back. "Then I will take you out onto the pier today or we can go for a walk to the shops up the street if you feel like it. If you get tired though, you need to sleep so no forcing yourself to stay up cause you are excited." The Doctor blinked at him and Jack sighed. He dressed the Doctor in just a pair of trousers and a plain shirt. He didn't bother with his wheel chair as he carried him straight through to the medical room and laid him on the bed.

Even though Martha had just been there the day before, she rushed back to Torchwood to confirm the Doctor's progress. As she entered the medical room she saw the Doctor was clearly staring at Jack.

"Hello Doctor," She said happily. He didn't look at her. "Jack move to this side of the bed please." She instructed as she took off her coat. Jack did as she stated and she watched as the Doctor's eyes followed him.

"He didn't watch Gwen either," Jack informed her as she stepped up to the bed and the Doctor made no move to look at her.

"I want to try something then. Can I have you step out of the room for just a moment," Martha questioned. Jack nodded and walked just outside the doorway. As soon as he was out of sight the Doctor's eyes started to look frantically around the room. "It's all right Doctor. He will be back in a moment." The Doctor glanced at her for a quick moment before looking for Jack again.

"You can come back in," Martha called out as the Doctor began to whimper softly.

"I'm here," Jack told him as he stepped up next to the bed again. He picked up the Doctor's hand in his and the whimpering stopped as the Doctor focused once more on Jack.

"That is very unusual behavior," Martha commented as she watched. "It is normal for a person to be confused as they come out of the vegetative state and have trouble focusing. He seems to be able to focus on you clearly though."

"Is it because I knew him before this happened?" Jack questioned. Martha shrugged.

"Your guess is as good as mine," She told him. Picking up her chart she looked to the Doctor again. "I want to try a few simple test to see how aware he is. Now Doctor can you squeeze Jack's hand?" They waited and received no response. Martha ran through a list of simple instructions all of which the Doctor either ignored or didn't understand. There was no way at this point to be sure which it was. Both Martha and Jack had hope with his progress though and when Martha left an hour later she was happier with his progress then she had been the day before.

Jack returned the Doctor to his room and sat him down in his wheelchair. He then took him up to the kitchen in order to make them breakfast. Before he would have left the Doctor with Gwen or alone for a moment but with the way he panicked when Jack left the room, Jack had no plans to leave his side again.

-DW-

As the Doctor stood peeking out from the doorway of the TARDIS there was one thing that he quickly realized, the world was loud. He didn't know how long he had been in the quiet control room but opening the door had brought in so many new noises that he found it hard to concentrate. There was the sound of the water running through the pipes in the sewers and the dripping of it into the empty tub after his bath. Then there was the sound of Jack's voice, computers beeping, others talking and the sound of the pterodactyl above them. It all seemed like to much and he wanted to slam the door behind him and hide on the captain's chair again.

He instead focused on Jack. Jack was a fact in the world of chaos. It was almost like his only little piece of silence in a world that was to bright and to loud. Then almost as quickly as he had found his peace it was gone again. He frantically searched for Jack, only settling for a moment on the woman sitting beside him. She was the same one who had stuck the needle into his arm and he quickly dismissed her. Among the other new noises of the room he heard someone whimpering. He was ashamed to figure out it was him, but he wanted Jack back. He was about ready to hide in his TARDIS again when Jack once more entered the room. The woman started talking to him again but he didn't pay attention to her as he kept his focus on Jack once more.

Jack looked at him sadly though there was a smile on his face. He knew he was the cause of Jack's sadness and he hated the fact that he was making Jack sad. He didn't know what had happened to his body but he could tell from the little that he had watched that his body was useless and it was going to take a lot of work for him to run again. He wasn't going to accomplish it hiding in the TARDIS though. He ran his hand comfortingly along her door frame, hesitating before he took that final step. She hummed louder at him. Taking a deep breath he stepped off and the door slammed closed behind him.

-DW-

Though the Torchwood kitchen was well stocked with food so that Jack could feed himself and the Doctor, Jack made himself a simple breakfast of toast as he made the Doctor's normal breakfast of oatmeal. He always made it with extra cream so that it would be easier for the Doctor to swallow. He sat his toast down in front of the Doctor before grabbing the bowl of oatmeal.

"Tea?" The request was so quiet that Jack almost missed it. He didn't know what to feel at that moment. The Doctor's first word in almost two years was a request for tea. He wanted to laugh with happiness at the same time as he wanted to cry with relief. Instead he bit back his emotions as he made the Doctor a cup of tea. He made sure it was lukewarm so the Doctor didn't burn himself. Sitting back down in front of him, he held the cup for the Doctor to take a drink.

"It's good to hear your voice again," Jack told him. The Doctor looked at Jack slightly confused. There was an awareness behind his eyes that hadn't been there before. Jack was going to have to be careful in what he said from now on. He had gotten so use to just talking to the Doctor that it would be difficult but he could learn to control his mouth again. So, Jack didn't explain as he picked up a spoonful of oatmeal and put it in the Doctor's mouth. The Doctor started to lift his own hand but Jack stopped him without even thinking about it. The Doctor had tried to grab the spoon in the past and made a mess all over the both of them. He swallowed the oatmeal and turned his head away.

The Doctor didn't understand where he was. One minute he had been aboard the TARDIS and about to take Rose out to see her mother. Now he was sitting in a chair and he had no idea how he got there. He had vague images, almost dream like of watching Jack but they didn't make sense. He tried to move. His body though felt weak and he couldn't control it properly. He wanted to stand but he was strapped into the wheelchair. Even if he wasn't though his legs didn't seem to want to co-operate with him. He tried to lift them but they moved very little at his request and when he tried to take the spoon from Jack, Jack had stopped him as easily as you would a child.

"Doctor," Jack asked softly. The Doctor looked back at him. His eyes were full of pain and Jack could tell he was struggling to figure out what was going on. His mind had finally caught up to his eyes and body and his mind didn't understand.

"Jack," The Doctor said, his voice scratchy from not being used for two years but still full of pain none the less. His eyes looked around an unfamiliar room. Something was very wrong and he didn't know what it was. He needed to know what had happened to him and where was Rose. What was Jack doing here when the last time he had saw Jack was aboard the Game station. Nothing made sense.


	4. Chapter 4

The Doctor's mind was finally waking up and he was terrified. Jack could see it in his eyes and the way he tried to contort his body to get away from Jack but couldn't move. He opened and closed his mouth several times, struggling to get a breath in. Jack really hoped that he wouldn't have to call Martha back after she just left. He looked at his watch. She had only been gone less then a half an hour so if he called her now she could turn around at the next exit. He had to calm the Doctor down first.

"Easy now, I promise you that you are safe Doctor," Jack tried to reassure him. He reached out to the Doctor and the Doctor flinched away as if he had been burned. Jack pulled back but didn't stop talking to him slowly."You need to calm down. Just take slow breaths." The Doctor wasn't listening though as his breath became even more shallow. Finally his body couldn't take it anymore and his eyes rolled up in his head as he passed out. Jack reached out and stroked a piece of hair back from the Doctor's face. He had taken care of this man for the last two years but now he had no idea how to help him.

"Gwen, call Martha and get her back here now," Jack demanded as he pushed the Doctor through to his room. He unstrapped the Doctor from the wheelchair and lifted him carefully on his bed. Hopefully when the Doctor awoke again he would be calmer from not being trapped in the wheelchair. The Doctor's breathing had returned to a normal pace now that he had passed out but he showed no signs that he was waking up again. Jack sat down in the chair next to the Doctor's bed and rested his chin on his clasped hands.

"She is on her way," Gwen told him from the doorway of the Doctor's room.

"I want her in here as soon as she arrives," Jack snipped slightly.

"I will bring her through. Is there anything you need in the meantime?" Gwen asked him softly, trying to figure out what was wrong. The Doctor was asleep again but she had been told they were going to let him sleep so she wasn't sure why it was suddenly a problem.

"A bullet hole in Ianto's head would be helpful," Jack informed her. He turned his eyes only to look at her as she sighed softly.

"Now that the Doctor is waking up, might I suggest we transfer Ianto out of the cells and to UNIT," Gwen suggested to Jack. He turned his eyes away from her and back to the Doctor.

"The Doctor has no need to go to the cells. Ianto can stay where he is," Jack answered her.

"Jack," Gwen tried.

"I am still the boss around here," Jack snapped at her angrily. He would feel bad about taking his anger out on her later but for now he was to worried about the Doctor to care.

"Yes sir," Gwen answered and left the room. Jack continued to watch the Doctor sleep. Hopefully Martha would be able to provide Jack answers because at the moment he felt helpless.

-DW-

Despite Jack not wanting to transfer Ianto to UNIT, Gwen still went to draw up the reports and the transfer request when she left the room. She knew that Jack was upset over something and when he came around again he would realize it was best to get Ianto out of the hub. They could control the Doctor now because he was in a wheelchair and would have to get his strength up in order to walk again. What then? There was no way to stop him from going down to the cells unless they kept a constant eye on him and from what she heard about the Time Lord, if they told him not to go there, he would find a way. It was best to get Ianto away so that the Doctor didn't accidentally confront him before he was ready.

She had seen the reports before. She had thankfully not been there when Ianto had dictated what he had done to the Doctor. All of it had been recorded and then typed up for the records. Gwen never listened to the tapes though as hearing it had reading it had been bad enough. Ianto admitted to beating, strangling and raping the Doctor. If he had been tried in a normal court he would have been imprisoned for attempted murder as he strangled the Doctor a total of three times to weaken him. The final time he had strangled the Doctor long enough that he had stopped breathing for awhile.

Gwen wasn't sure how he had lived. The only thing she knew for sure was the Doctor had something called a respiratory bi-pass that allowed him to hold his breath longer than a human. Ianto didn't know that though. He had thought he had killed the Doctor as he left him there on the floor of the room. She made a copy of the confession and attached it to the correct transfer documents. She had just finished filing it away when Martha rushed into Torchwood. She made a beeline for the medical room.

"He is in his room," Gwen told her. She didn't slow her pace as she turned and went to the Doctor's room instead.

"I can't leave you alone five minutes," Martha chastised softly as she entered the room. The Doctor was still passed out on the bed and Martha ran through his vitals. "What happened?"

"He wanted tea. I gave him a small cup and he panicked. He hyperventilated until he passed out and he has been asleep since," Jack explained to her. She carefully checked the Doctor's pupil response. They were normal and his vitals gave her no other indication that something was wrong besides the fact he suddenly wanted to take a nap.

"I will stick around until he wakes up so I can examine him again," Martha informed Jack. "Also I will call the lab and make sure they are working on his blood so we can be sure he doesn't have an illness as he is trying to wake up. I am then going to go and get a cup of coffee while we wait. Do you want one?"

"No thank you," Jack declined. He just wanted the Doctor to wake up and not be afraid again. He didn't think that was an option though so he would settle for him waking up.

Though Jack had declined a cup of coffee, Martha brought him one anyway. She had spoken to Gwen about her conversation with Jack and agreed that it was in the Doctor's best interest to have Ianto transferred to UNIT. She even said that she would take the paperwork with her to begin the process. Gwen though didn't want to step on Jack's toes but giving her the authorization. She politely declined but advised Martha to talk to Jack about it. Martha handed Jack the cup of coffee and he took it, taking a sip.

"Gwen tells me you don't want to move Ianto to UNIT," Martha told Jack as she stood near him. Jack sighed loudly. He was going to have to talk to Gwen about running to Martha when she didn't agree with his decision.

"Ianto has been here for two years without incident. My cells are just as secure as UNIT's cells. The cells can also be locked off from the rest of the building so even when the Doctor does start moving around he won't be able to reach them easily," Jack informed her, trying to justify his decision.

"Until he gets confused or bored and decides to break into them," Martha answered back. She had read many case files on the Doctor and knew his tendency to enter places he didn't belong. Granted he was helping most of the time but Martha also knew from Jack's stories of the Doctor's curiosity about life in general. "I know you think you can control him but he is waking from a vegetative state. Even though no two cases are exactly alike most patients due experience confusion and he has all ready shown that he is one of them. We both know I wouldn't be here if he was just confused, I am more worried about the fact that he made himself pass out. We also know that his brain works differently then ours and he may or may not even remember what happened to him."

"I really hope he doesn't remember what happened to him," Jack admitted softly.

"If he doesn't, do you want to trigger the memory before he is ready? Because if you do then I suggest you leave Ianto right where he is." Martha told him softly. Jack looked at her. "Then what happens. He gets scared and he runs before he is ready to travel on his own. Or worse he decides to shut down again. I know you don't want that Jack."

"I will draw up the paperwork tonight and speak to Sir Alistair," Jack informed Martha. She was right, he couldn't risk the Doctor fleeing before he was ready. If that happened who knew what sort of trouble he would get himself into. He needed to know that he was safe and had all the support Torchwood and UNIT could offer him until he was ready to travel again. Jack took the Doctor's hand and squeezed it softly. The Doctor's hand flexed slightly in his.

"He is starting to wake up. I moved him in here hoping that he will be calmer when he wakes without being restrained in his wheelchair," Jack explained to her.

"Is it possible there was to much going on around him that caused him to become confused?" Martha questioned trying to find if there was a trigger they could avoid until he was healthier.

"No, it was just me and him in the kitchen," Jack answered. The Doctor's eyes fluttered open slightly and then he closed them immediately again. He opened them a second time a moment later. Jack was happy to see that the awareness was still in the brown eyes as he looked around the room. The Doctor's room had been designed to be functional, yet comfortable for him to heal in. There was a full size bed with four oak post. The mattress and the pillow were the best that money could buy while the sheets and comforter were from the TARDIS. The comforter was a rich blue color that was softer and more durable then any blankets that Jack had found on earth. There was a bureau on one wall with a telly mounted behind it. The wall behind Jack was almost completely covered in bookshelves and filled with books. The Doctor's eyes though started at the wall opposite Jack, as though he knew but didn't care Jack was there.

The wall had been decorated with pictures that Jack had received. In one picture it showed the Doctor in his current body with Sarah Jane and Rose. In another it was just him and Sarah Jane. He also had an older picture of the Doctor wearing a long scarf and standing next to a young brigadier. The last picture on the wall looked older then all the rest. It was the two of them together with the leather clad Doctor Jack had first met. Rose had taken the picture and given Jack a copy of it before he had been left behind.

"Doctor," Jack said softly, trying to get his attention. The Doctor ignored him and continued to stare at the wall. "Doctor, your doctor Martha is here and she wants to ask you a few questions before she has to leave." That got his attention and he turned his head to look at Jack before rolling his eyes down to look at Martha. His brow was wrinkled in confusion once more as he didn't remember having a doctor. Martha though did look familiar but he wasn't sure where he had seen her before.

"Hello." Martha used the voice she normally used with children, trying to make him more comfortable with her. He smiled slightly at her but didn't speak. "Let's start with something easy. Can you squeeze Jack's hand?" She asked as Jack was still holding his. The Doctor's fingers flexed slightly again and while he didn't grip it tightly it was enough to show he had tried. "Good now I want you to wiggle your toes." He rolled his eyes at her but she saw the blanket moving indicating he had followed that instruction as well.

"Very good. All right next I am going to ask you a few questions. First can you tell me the name you go by?" She asked being careful to word is so she wasn't asking his real name.

"Yes," He answered her hoarsely. His eyes narrowing in suspicion. He looked at Jack again and the cup in his hand. Licking his dry lips slightly he spoke again. "Tea?"

"It is coffee," Jack warned him. The Doctor occasionally drank coffee, but it was well known he preferred tea.

"K," The Doctor answered. Jack stood and held the cup to the Doctor's mouth. Tipping the cup slightly he helped the Doctor take a drink of the tea. The Doctor made a face at him as he swallowed. "Not tea," he muttered.

"No, I told you it was coffee," Jack informed him softly. "Now Martha has a few more questions for you and then I will make you a cup of tea if you want it." The Doctor looked at him confused again.

"Your doctor Martha. Remember she is asking you a few questions so she can see how you are doing," Jack reminded him. The Doctor narrowed his eyes suspiciously at Jack for a moment.

"Doctor, do you know where you are?" Martha asked, trying to get his attention again. He looked at her with disinterest before turning his attention back to Jack. Jack could see he was struggling to focus as Martha repeated her question. His eyes looked around the room and then moved back to Jack.

"Tea?" He questioned Jack.

"Just a few more questions Doctor," Jack tried.

"No, tea," The Doctor snipped as he slapped his hand down on the bed in clear aggravation. He wanted tea. He didn't want to be patient and answer questions. He slapped his hand down again.

"Go ahead and make him tea Jack. We can finish with the questions once he calms down again," Martha instructed Jack.

"No," The Doctor glared at her. He was done answering questions for her.

"Be nice," Jack chastised him softly as he stood up. He didn't want to leave the Doctor alone, but didn't think he would be comfortable being left for Martha. He went to the doorway and called out to Gwen. "Can you please make the Doctor a tea with three sugars?"

"Right away," she answered back. The Doctor looked at the door when he heard Gwen's voice. It was another one that sounded familiar but he wasn't sure from where. A lot of things weren't making sense again to him. He couldn't think clearly and he didn't like it, but he didn't know why. He didn't recognize the room he was in. Looking at Martha he shook his head no.

"I won't ask you any more questions," She reassured him.

"No," He couldn't get his mouth to form the words he wanted to say. "No," he said again frustrated and then hit the bed.

"No you don't know where you are?" Martha questioned and he nodded relieved she understood. Though he didn't know where he was, it didn't occur to him to even try to ask her. His eyes drifted back to Jack's cup and he looked at it hopefully.

"Tea?" He questioned and Jack sighed, trying to dislodge the lump that had formed in his throat. It had been hard seeing the Doctor there but not able to communicate with them. Seeing the Time Lord confused though seemed even harder. Jack just prayed silently to whatever was possibly out there, that this was only temporary as well.


	5. Chapter 5

Jack took his eyes off of the Doctor for less than a minute as Gwen finally brought in his tea. Turning back around revealed that the Doctor had lost interest in him and Martha and was looking around the room again. 

"I have a cup of tea for you, Doctor," Jack informed him holding the cup up. The Doctor's eyes settled on it for a moment before he licked his lips slightly. Jack sat down on the bed beside the Doctor and held the cup up to his mouth so that he could take a drink. The Doctor swallowed several mouthfuls and then smiled at Jack.

"Jack," he said softly and then pointed to the picture of him and Rose. Jack closed his eyes for a moment. He didn't want to tell the Doctor that he was sure Rose had gone into the void. He had searched and watched every possible angle for Rose falling and he couldn't find any evidence that contradicted that info, except for the fact the Doctor hadn't ran straight to the TARDIS to save her. Instead he had walked slowly towards the wall, looking like a man who just had both his hearts broken.

"I don't know," Jack told him. The Doctor stared at the picture for a moment longer before looking at Jack again. He smiled when he saw the cup and reached towards the tea. Jack helped him to take another drink. Jack then sat the cup of tea down. "I am going to talk to Martha a moment. I will be right outside the door if you need me."

"K," The Doctor sighed. He was a child who needed constant supervision even if his head felt funny. Jack closed the door slightly and turned slightly away before talking to Martha. The Doctor had good hearing and he didn't want him to overhear them, even if the chances were good that he would forget.

"I know the confusion is normal, but how long do you think he will be like this?" Jack asked her in a voice barely above a whisper.

"It is hard to say Jack. He has been in a vegetative state for two years now. I know it is hard for you to see but you have to be patient. I am going to come back tomorrow though to run scans on his head to check for any damage that didn't show while he was in the previous state. In the mean time just try to keep him calm and don't get too frustrated if you have to answer his demand for tea more then once today. Tomorrow he may have a completely different focus," Martha informed him, keeping her voice low as well. She gave a brief hug before heading out the door. Jack watched her go, taking slow steady breaths to calm himself. Feeling a little better he opened the door to the Doctor's room.

Stepping back into the room revealed the Doctor squirming slightly towards the edge of the bed. He looked extremely frustrated yet determined to get there.

"What are you doing?" Jack asked him as he went over to him. The Doctor glared up at him.

"Tea," He snipped as he continued to squirm towards the edge. His body wasn't responding to him correctly though and he was finding it even more frustrating to try to move. He was going to go and get tea and he didn't appreciate the fact that Jack was standing in his way.

"You have tea right here," Jack informed him. He picked up the cup and gave the Doctor another drink from it. "You must be hungry since you only ate one bite of your breakfast and slept through lunch. So how about a nice bowl of banana pudding for lunch."

"No," The Doctor answered back.

"You haven't ate anything today Doctor. If you don't want banana pudding what about applesauce with strawberry in it," Jack offered him.

"No," The Doctor looked around for tea again and his eyes settled on the cup in Jacks had. He drank the last of it with a happy slurp.

"All right then. How about oatmeal with banana and chocolate in it," Jack tried to tempt him.

"No."

"Can you say something besides no," Jack sighed. He loved the Doctor but he knew that getting him back to being healthy again was going to test all of Jack's patients. He just hoped that he had enough especially when the Doctor got a big grin on his face.

"No," He said happily.

"I thought not. Oatmeal with bananas it is." Jack told him. Pulling the Doctor's blankets back, he carefully scooped the Doctor up and put him in his wheelchair. The Doctor was fine until Jack went to buckle him in. The Doctor's eyes went wide and his breathing sped up once more. Jack immediately dropped the buckle and took both the Doctors hands in his. "Shh, calm down. I won't restrain you I promise," Jack cooed to him softly. The Doctor gripped Jack's hands loosely as he stared at him wide eyed still.

"Just breathe with me. In and out," Jack said the words slowly as he took a deep breath and let it out. The Doctor though passed out again. He didn't remain passed out for long though as this time once his breathing even out he started to come back around. He opened his eyes and looked around the room before focusing on Jack.

"Tea?" he questioned.

"Tea it is." Jack forced a smile on to his face. As soon as he moved behind the Doctor to push his chair, the smile faded. "Tea and oatmeal for you and whiskey for me." He hadn't drank in a while but right at that moment he would have given anything to sink into the oblivion that alcohol would bring him. He couldn't though, not with having to care for the Doctor. Instead he would settle for another coffee.

-DW-

As Jack tucked the Doctor into bed that night, he had little problem changing the sleepy Time Lord into his pajamas and tucking him into bed. In fact the rest of their day together had been fairly easy once Martha had left. Jack found that as long as he kept a cup of tea where the Doctor could see it and kept him entertained and unrestrained, the Doctor remained happy. He still had thrown a few more fits and was limited to a four word vocabulary that seemed to frustrate him at times while at other times he didn't even seem to notice. He also fell asleep two more times randomly. Once while Jack was talking to him and he tried not to be offended that he seemed to bore the Doctor to sleep.

"Sleep well Doctor," Jack cooed softly as he turned off the light to the Doctor's room.

"Jack," The Doctor whimpered and Jack turned the light back on. The Doctor was staring at him, his eyes wide.

"Do you want me to stay with you until you fall asleep?" Jack asked him and the Doctor nodded. Jack returned to his side and sat down in his chair. Picking up the book he had been reading to the Doctor, he opened it to the page he had left off on. He opened his mouth to begin reading but looked at the Doctor before he started. The Doctor was watching him through half lidded eyes. Jack flipped to the beginning of the book and started from the first chapter once more. He stopped reading once he noticed the Doctor was asleep but he sat with him for another hour before finally getting up to go and begin Ianto's transfer paper work.

He was relieved to find that Gwen had all ready completed it and he signed the papers. He didn't want to review the information again. One of the main reason Ianto remained at Torchwood was worry that if he went to UNIT they would want to put him on trial for his crimes against the Doctor. Jack had all ready listened once to his confession he didn't think he could go through it again. Worse if Ianto decided to plead not guilty, Jack would have to testify against him and Jack couldn't do it. He had once loved Ianto and to describe the horrible things that he was capable of made Jack feel sick. He reached for the whiskey but stopped himself as he thought of the Doctor sleeping peacefully in his room. He was going to be up in a few hours and Jack needed to be there for him. Sighing he left the paperwork on his desk as he headed to his room to try to sleep.

-DW-

The Doctor was all ready beginning to wake up by the time Jack went into get him. He was laying slightly curled on his side, which Jack found strange to see since he always had laid the Doctor on his back. He started his morning routine with the Doctor, and started to strip him of his clothes. The Doctor actually moved his hand to cover himself which Jack didn't know if he found amusing or not.

"Don't worry Doctor, I am just going to get you cleaned up and dressed nothing more," He promised the Time Lord. He quickly discovered the Doctor did not like being cleaned up or having his catheter cleaned as he glared at Jack and squirmed the entire time. He calmed down slightly though as Jack picked him up and carried him into the bath. He gently lowered the Doctor into the water.

"See I know what I am doing," Jack informed the Time Lord as he supported him. The Doctor rolled his eyes and Jack smiled at him. He resisted the urge to kiss the Doctor on the side of the head, not knowing if he would like it. Instead he picked up the wash cloth and carefully washed the Doctor's body. The Doctor stared at him. "Don't feel like talking this morning?" Jack asked him slightly concerned as the Doctor stared.

"No," The Doctor sighed loudly like he was being highly inconvenienced by having to answer Jack. Jack though found it amusing. He finished washing the Doctor's back and then let the water out of the tub. He grabbed the Doctor's towel off the towel rack beside him and wrapped it around the Doctor before carrying him back to his bed to dress him for the day.

"Jack, tea?" The Doctor questioned as he was laid once more on the bed.

"After I help you get dressed. You don't want to go into the hub naked do you," Jack answered, continuing in his normal routine. The Doctor shook his head no but giggled. Jack looked at him curiously. "Why are you laughing?"

"Jack," The Doctor drew out his name with a grin. He chuckled again and this time it was Jack's turn to shake his head. Dressing the Doctor was much like dressing a toddler and he had to fight the squirming Time Lord in order to get him into a pair of trousers and a clean shirt. He didn't even try to get his shoes on as the Doctor became impatient with getting dressed. Jack lifted him to his wheelchair and took him through to the kitchen for breakfast. For breakfast he made him tea, oatmeal and a banana. He still had to feed the Time Lord but he was happy to see that the Doctor was able to chew and swallow the banana. He was going to have to introduce more food slowly but it allowed him to give the Doctor more options when it came meal time.

Martha arrived to the hub earlier than normal and they got the Doctor into the Torchwood MRI and CT scanner in order to find out what was going on with his brain. He didn't want to lay still though and Martha didn't want to sedate him. Eventually they reached a compromise where Jack sat with him, holding his hands and talking to him until the scan was completed. The scans revealed that while he had more brain activity then a human would in a minimally conscious state, it was in fact still low even for a human.

"You have to stop comparing him to a human," Jack informed her as they went over the scans.

"I have no other scans to base my comparisons on," Martha answered back. "The only other brain scan I have for him is while he was in the vegetative state. His brain activity has increased a lot since then and will continue to increase."

"Will his vocabulary increase as well or is he going to have to relearn to talk?" Jack wondered.

"All of it is to soon to tell. I could tell yesterday that he is trying to form words but he was finding it difficult. He should continue to show improvement over the next few weeks and then we will be better able to set goals for his long term rehabilitation. From what I have been able to observe he is going to need help getting back on his feet and walking as well as taking care of himself from day to day. He may be able to do that on his own one day, or you may need to help him for the rest of his life, again only time will tell," Martha answered Jack. She didn't want to make Jack any promises because at that moment she didn't know. The Doctor was more awake and aware then she expected after two years, but he was still just waking up.

"Why?" The Doctor questioned, showing that he was listening to their conversation.

"You got hurt," Jack told him vaguely. The Doctor narrowed his eyes at Jack and opened his mouth. Jack didn't give him a chance to ask why again as that was a conversation that he wasn't ready to have. "We are taking good care of you and you can stay here as long as you need to. You can also have all the tea that you want."

"Tea?" The Doctor's eyes lit up and just like Jack hoped he was distracted by the offer of tea. It seemed that tea was going to be his focus again today and Jack was going to have to make sure he always had a cup available.

"I will get you a cup." Jack lifted him up and placed him in his wheelchair. "Martha would you like a cup of coffee?"

"No thank you. I have to be getting back to UNIT. I also am going to update Sir Alistair about the Doctor's condition," Martha answered as she followed them out into the main part of the hub again.

"The paperwork is ready for the transfer if you want to take it with you," Jack told her. He didn't look at her as he said it. "Gwen can get it for you off of my desk."

"I will and Jack you are making the right decision," Martha informed him.

"I hope so," Jack answered her back softly.


	6. Chapter 6

Rather than taking the Doctor directly to the kitchen for tea, he instead paused in the hub. The rest of his team was all ready there and working. Jack took the Doctor over to Gwen and put the breaks on his chair. Coming around it he could see the Doctor looking at Gwen in confusion.

"Doctor, this is Gwen. She is going to spend a little bit of time with you while I take care of something," Jack told him softly. The Doctor's eyes bolted to Jack before going back to Gwen.

"Why?" the Doctor snipped slightly. He didn't want to stay with Gweneth. He wasn't even sure how Gweneth was here when he had watched her die in the basement as Rose and him watched on. She died protecting them from something. He tried to think of what it was but it was like digging in sand, every time he got a glimpse of the information it faded again. An alien species that was just a large head came to mind. It didn't seem to fit but he could sort that out later.

"Because you are safe with Gwen. Also you are safe with the rest of my team." Jack pointed to Owen. "That is Owen. He is the doctor here and he is your secondary doctor when Martha is unavailable. He also helps her out on occasion. And this is Tosh. I think you know Tosh."

"Yes," The Doctor stated happily as Tosh came into view. He recognized her. He had met her before that he was sure of, how though he didn't remember. He looked towards Jack as he pointed at her. "Jack?"

"She met you when the spaceship crashed into big Ben. I knew you were going to be involved from the stories you had told me, so I had to send her to investigate," Jack explained to him.

"Do you remember the mermaid?" Tosh asked him gently. "It was really just a pig that had been made to look like alien by the aliens." The Doctor smiled at her. The story sounded insane. Pigs weren't aliens, but he liked her anyways. He still didn't want to stay with them and when Jack thought he was distracted and started to walk off. He noticed.

"Jack," He snapped angrily as he started to squirm in the chair. He wasn't buckled in so as he squirmed he moved lower in the seat. Afraid he was going to fall out Jack returned to him and picked him up under his arms to move him back. As he did so the Doctor struck him in the arm.

"Oi, be nice," Jack scolded him. "I can still buckle you into the chair."

"No," The Doctor argued back. He slapped the arm of the chair hard.

"Then behave and calm down. I am only going to be gone a few minutes. I am sure that if you ask nicely Gwen will make you tea, but not if you hit and yell at her," Jack chastised. The Doctor continued to glare at Jack but he stood his ground.

"Tea?" He growled still looking at Jack.

"Ask Gwen," Jack said firmly. The Doctor sighed and turned to look at Gwen.

"Tea." The amount of sarcasm that the Time Lord could put into the single word amazed Jack. Gwen smiled at him.

"Three sugars?" She questioned and he nodded. After Gwen left to go and make his tea Tosh moved to sit beside him and started to tell him about the space pig again. Jack waited until she had his full attention before taking a step backwards. He kept going slowly until he was half way across the hub. Gwem returned with his tea and he allowed her to help him take a drink. Satisfied he would be fine for a moment, Jack finally turned and headed down to the cells. He half expected the Doctor to call him back but the call never came.

He headed to Ianto's cell to find him reading a book as he ate a piece of toast. Jack wasn't surprised by the sight. He was fully aware of the fact that Gwen and Tosh took turns delivering food down to the cell, even on days Jack ordered Ianto to starve. They also gave him books for him to read, not because they felt sorry for him, but because they were genuinely nice people, who felt he should be allowed to read if he wanted to. Jack cleared his throat as he approached the cell and Ianto put the book down.

"I am arranging to have you transferred to UNIT," Jack informed him.

"What made you finally change your mind?" Ianto asked in surprise from the news. He had asked Jack to let UNIT or the local police force take him into custody several times over the years. He knew that the sentence he received there could be worse but at least he wouldn't be trapped in a cell with only a weevil scratching in the next cell for company.

"I didn't do it for you. I did it for the Doctor," Jack explained snidely. "I would prefer that you rot in these cells for the crime you committed. I one time trusted you and you broke that trust in the most horrible way possible. Even if I live to be a million, I will never understand why you did it."

Ianto didn't answer him. They had the conversation in the past as Jack tried to understand what drove Ianto to hurt someone so brutally. He had seemed like such a loving man, that when he snapped, Jack couldn't help but wonder how he judge of character could be so wrong. If anyone had told him what Ianto was capable of he would have thought they were lying, but here he was a witness to it.

"One day you are going to have to answer for your crimes against him. I hope then that you have an answer because he isn't going to accept you being quiet," Jack told Ianto. Regardless of whether or not the Doctor ever remembered what happened to him, he was still going to have to be told one day why he had spent two years in a vegetative state. Jack didn't know if he would actually confront Ianto on it but he didn't want Ianto to ever forget for a moment why he was in the cell. He had succeeded where so many had failed in the past and completely broken the Doctor.

The Doctor had just watched the woman he loved disappear before his eyes. He had both of his hearts shattered. Jack could picture him walking down that long corridor devastated from losing Rose and the thousands of people he was unable to save. Then just when he thought his day couldn't get any worse, Ianto proved him wrong. Jack slammed his fist into the cell door causing Ianto to jump.

"I hope they lock you up for life," Jack snipped as he left the dimly lit cells. He was relieved to be back up in the bright room of the Torchwood hub. Even if that relief was short live because the Doctor had noticed he was missing.

"Jack," The Doctor called out angrily as he tried to get away from Gwen and Tosh. He quickly ran to the Doctor's side.

"Shhh. I am here," He cooed softly.

"Jack, no," The Doctor snipped at him, holding up a finger as if he was scolding Jack. Jack smiled at him.

"Don't worry. I won't leave you again. I promise," Jack reassured him. He gave the Doctor a small hug. Leaning back he looked the Time Lord in the eye. "Let's get you something to entertain you so I can work."

"Jack," The Doctor rolled his name in amusement. Jack sighed as he realized that he had been wrong. The source of the Doctor's focus today wasn't tea again but Jack himself. He knew he was going to be in for a long day.

-DW-

Jack was actually pleasantly surprised that he was wrong. The rest of the morning flew by once the Doctor and him were alone in his office. Granted he didn't get any work done as the Doctor demanded constant attention but he did find himself having fun with the Doctor. He had tried several ways to distract the Doctor but being that the Doctor had a short attention span at the best of time, Jack would just get settled again when the Doctor would be calling his name. Finally he gave up on work and went around the desk.

"What would you like Doctor," Jack asked him as patiently as he could, as his patients had actually reached the breaking point. The Doctor just smiled at him, glad to be the center of attention again. "You win. I will pay attention to you even though the paper work on my desk is piling up and I have to one else to work it."

The Doctor tilted his head to the side as he considered and then disregarded Jack's words. He cared very little that Jack had work to do as he was bored of Jack's office. Jack though reached into the drawer and pulled out an activity book. The Doctor's eyes lit up as Jack opened it to the first page and then sat down beside the Doctor to help him complete it. He quickly found that the Doctor was just as uncoordinated when it came to writing as he was when speaking but that didn't matter. Jack replaced the book with plain pieces of paper. The Doctor drew sloppy pictures and the two of them were soon laughing as they created a scene on the paper.

"The sun does to go on the ground," Jack informed the Doctor indignantly as he drew a sun on the grass. The Doctor pointed to the sky and growled at Jack. Jack chuckled and continued drawing to which the Doctor added what Jack thought might be a bird to the sky. There was a knock at the door and Jack looked up. "Come in."

"Sorry to interrupt. I just got off the phone with Martha and she has informed me that the Doctor does have a higher than normal white blood cell count. I need to take a urine sample to test for possible infection," Owen explained. The Doctor made a face at him. Being that the Doctor had a catheter it was simple enough for Owen to take the sample, without disturbing the Doctor to much. Though he was obviously unhappy about having Owen take care of it.

"Jack," The Doctor complained as Owen replaced the bag.

"You're all right," Jack informed him as Owen left the room. He managed to calm down the Doctor and then took him to the kitchen for lunch. He made the Doctor rice for lunch and the Doctor ate every bite. After his lunch though he soon drifted off to sleep and Jack finally was able to get work done. Jack let the Doctor sleep in his chair, as he seemed comfortable, so he could keep one eye on him. He didn't like how much it reminded him of the Doctor's vegetative state. The main difference was the Doctor was snoring softly and occasionally would moan or grunt in his sleep. Jack's cell phone rang and he quickly answered it so as not to disturb the Doctor.

"Hello?" Jack answered.

"Hello old chap," the Brigadier said happily. "I am calling about the paperwork I was presented with today about a transfer for Ianto Jones. I was wondering if I could discuss it with you?"

"Just a moment," Jack informed him. He stepped out of his office so that their talking wouldn't awaken the Doctor. He leaned on the railing looking out into the rest of the hub. Tosh was in her normal place working at the rift computer but he didn't see the others. "Go ahead sir."

"I was aware that Ianto Jones has been in your custody for the last two years for his crimes against the Doctor. According to the documents that I received, he never was put on trial for these crimes or formally sentenced. Is that correct?" The Brigadier asked him. Jack sighed.

"That is correct sir. He gave a full confession once he was arrested. Also semen found indicted him of rape. He was sentenced by Torchwood to life in the cells due to attempted murder and assault," Jack explained. He didn't tell the Brigadier that he had actually told Ianto you will stay in the cell until you rot. "I have included the full confession in the file. For the Doctor's privacy though, I have not included the pictures that were taken after he was found."

"I understand. We will take Mister Jones into our custody first thing tomorrow morning. I warn you though a formal trial maybe required," The Brigadier informed Jack.

"For the Doctor's sake I hope not," Jack answered him.

"How is he?" The Brigadier asked, dropping the professional tone as they spoke of his old friend.

"He is sleeping at the moment. He is out of the vegetative state and more aware of his surroundings. I don't think it would be a good idea to take him to UNIT at the moment, but if you want to come here for a cuppa, I am sure he will be happy to see you," Jack told him.

"Jack?" The Doctor called out from his office.

"I will come by this weekend," The Brigadier answered.

"We will see you then. Now I have to go the Doctor is awake and requires my attention," Jack told him. He hung up the phone and went back into his office. The Doctor was awake and looking around. He smiled when his eyes settled on Jack again. "Sorry I had to take a phone call. Did you sleep well?"

"Yes," The Doctor answered sounding sleepy still.

"You can go back to sleep if you are still tired. I am going to be right here at my desk, I promise," Jack reassured him. He brushed the hair back on the Doctor's forehead as his eyes started to drift closed again. He forced them open though to look at Jack curiously.

"What?" Jack questioned. His question was answered though as Owen came into the room once room. Jack turned to him. "Yes Owen?"

"I did a rush on the Doctor's urine analysis and though the test are not yet completed, from initial analysis I am positive he has an infection. I spoke to Martha and she has ordered that he have an antibiotic injection," Owen explained as he pulled a capped syringe out of his pocket.

"No," The Doctor said loudly looking at it wide eyed.

"It will just take a minute," Jack told him. Jack nodded at Owen and then moved to restrain the Doctor. He wrapped his arms around the Doctor as if he was giving him a hug and the Doctor tensed immediately. Owen pulled up his shirt sleeve and the Doctor tried to squirm and get out of Jack's embrace.

"No Jack," He whined. He yelped loudly as the needle was pressed into his arm. "No, no, no." He complained at them.

"Shhh. You're all right," Jack cooed at him soothingly. Owen removed the needle and put a plaster over the injection site. Jack waited until Owen had left again before releasing the Doctor. The look on the Doctor's face was of pure betrayal and Jack knew it would take more then a cup of tea to make it right again.


	7. Chapter 7

Jack made a decision at that moment though. Rather then giving into the Doctor's anger he was going to do what he had done the last two years and take care of him. He pulled up a chair so that he was still facing the Doctor and sat down. The Doctor continued to glare at him.

"I know you are unhappy with me letting Owen give you an injection but if he were to come in the room and tell me you needed another, I would hold you so he could again," Jack told the Doctor bluntly. The Doctor's eyes narrowed more. "I am still your friend Doctor and I always will be. I am also your caregiver until you are able to take care of yourself again. I have legally signed documents that give me that responsibility and even without them I would still take care of you. That may mean that I have to make decisions that you don't like but I am always thinking of your best interest. One day you will be able to leave here and if you leave me behind again, I will understand, I just hope you understand that I am doing my best."

"Jack," The Doctor rolled his name slightly. The Doctor lifted his hand and Jack reached out to take it. Rather then holding his hand though, the Doctor clumsily patted it twice and then returned his hand to his chair. Jack sighed as he stood up and went around his desk to begin working again. The Doctor's eyes were drifting closed and soon he was asleep once more. Reaching into his desk Jack pulled out the Doctor's file and the paperwork naming him as the Time Lord's carer.

Jack remembered clearly the day that he had signed them. He had all ready been taking care of the Doctor for a few months at that point. The Doctor had awoken from his coma and no matter what he or the TARDIS did, it was clear that the Doctor was going to remain in the vegetative state until he was ready to come out of it.

"Is this really necessary?" He had asked Martha as she presented the paperwork her first day there. As first impressions went, he wasn't happy with her regardless of how highly recommended she came from the Brigadier.

"The Brigadier understands that you are his caregiver and he wants to keep it that way. In order for me to care for him with your permission though you need to sign the paperwork. It is more of a formality in case he gets worse or we need to transfer him to UNIT for anything," Martha explained. "Without this he could be taken from you or if we do take him to UNIT, we may not be able to release him back into your care."

"Why would he have to go to UNIT?" Jack questioned as he examined the paperwork.

"Surgery, medical scans, check ups or for physical therapy. Even if he wakes up he is going to still need long term care and this paperwork is naming you his carer until he is able to take care of himself again," Martha informed Jack.

"When he wakes up you mean," Jack replied. Martha looked at him sadly.

"I have been over his brain scans that were taken. He is in a vegetative state and the longer he stays in it the less likely he is to wake up," Martha told him sadly. Jack didn't believe that though. She didn't know the Doctor and what he was capable of. If anyone could come back from this it was him. Jack looked over at the man laying in the bed. Back then he didn't dream of moving the Doctor further than one bed to another. He couldn't imagine the Doctor being taken care of by someone who didn't know him. Someone who had never sat and talked with the Doctor long nights or had laughed with him. He could imagine the Doctor waking up, terrified because he didn't know what had happened or who was taking care of him. The Doctor would automatically think the worse and escape before he was ready, causing himself more injury. Jack couldn't let that happen. Without a further thought he had signed the paperwork.

Jack put the paperwork back into the file and put it away. There was no point in living in the past when he had work to do. He had to get as much done as possible now because once the Doctor woke up again he would require attention. He would need his dinner and for his dinner Jack was planning a banana milkshake with oats and peanut butter. He meant what he said about taking care of the Time Lord but that didn't mean he couldn't spoil him a little. Then the two of them could relax, maybe even watch a movie before he had to get the Doctor cleaned up and into his jimjams. Once the Doctor was in his bed and asleep for the night, Jack maybe able to work on the paperwork again but he doubted it.

Night time was his time. It was the only time he got peace in the hub. The Doctor would be asleep while the rest were at home. Jack would have the freedom to do whatever he wanted. Well almost whatever he wanted, he couldn't kill Ianto or get drunk. Still that left his options open. Looking down Jack realized that he wasn't going to get anything done today. Giving up on the paperwork once more, he pushed it aside for tomorrow.

-DW-

The next morning Jack made a small breakfast for the Doctor and him that the two of them could share down on the pier. He didn't want the Doctor anywhere in the hub when UNIT came to collect Ianto and risk the Doctor even getting a glimpse of him. He left the necessary paperwork with Gwen for the transfer and took his cell phone with him in case he needed to go back for any reason. The Doctor was suspicious of the fact they had left the safety of the hub but he was enjoying the fresh air so he didn't complain.

"Are you hungry?" Jack asked him as they reached one of the benches overlooking the water.

"Yes." The Doctor looked at him like he was crazy. Of course he was hungry he hadn't eaten since dinner last night and he hoped that Jack had the foresight to bring tea with him. Jack reached into the bag he had brought and pulled out two thermoses, a banana, a small container of oatmeal with a spoon and a sandwich. Opening one of the thermoses he poured the Doctor a cup of tea and helped him to take a drink.

"There you two are," A familiar voice said startling Jack. Looking up he was surprised to see that Sarah Jane was making her way over to them.

"Sarah Jane," Jack said happily, quickly recovering from the shock of hearing her.

"The Brigadier told me he was awake. I dropped Luke off at a friend's house so I could come down here first thing," Sarah Jane informed Jack.

"Well you are always welcome," Jack replied. He stood up to give her a hug and then the two of them turned to look at the Doctor. As happy as he was to see Sarah Jane again, he was a little upset that his breakfast had been interrupted. He was trying to reach for the banana but he wasn't quite coordinated enough to get it yet.

"Ape," He mumbled to himself as he swung and missed it.

"Are you calling yourself an ape?" Sarah Jane wondered as she grabbed the banana for him. She sat down beside him so that she could open it and help him eat. Of everyone who had passed through the Doctor's life in the last two years, their were very few who Jack let help take care of the Doctor. He had no choice with Sarah Jane. She had come to visit for the first time shortly after he had contacted the Brigadier. She had made it clear the Doctor was her oldest and dearest friend and that she would help to look after him when she could.

"No. Jack ape," The Doctor informed her with a smile on his face. He took a bite of the banana.

"He only can say about five words clearly and last night ape became one of them," Jack told Sarah Jane as he sat down on the bench beside them.

"That's not very nice," Sarah Jane chastised the Doctor. He shrugged at her as he opened his mouth for another bite. She gave it to him. "So why are you on the pier?"

"It is a beautiful day out and I thought some fresh air would do him some good. I have been meaning to take him out for a few days now but things keep coming up but with the transfer happening today, I thought it was a good time." Jack remained vague on purpose and he could see the Doctor eye him suspiciously. He opened and closed his mouth several times but the words he wanted to say wouldn't come.

"It is for the best," Sarah Jane answered. Jack wasn't surprised she had been told. She had been in the loop about what was happening for awhile now.

"So everyone keeps telling me," Jack sighed. He ran his hands down his face.

"Me," The Doctor finally asked softly. There was fear clearly in his eyes and he was sitting straighter in the chair, tense.

"No, you aren't going any where. You are going to stay right here with me until you are ready to leave," Jack promised him. He reached out and squeezed the Doctor's hand. The Doctor squeezed Jack's hand back as tightly as he could as he visibly relaxed. He didn't let go of Jack's hand as he opened his mouth to take a bite of the oatmeal Sarah Jane was now offering.

"You seem to be doing well," Sarah Jane told the Doctor happily. She had only been informed that he was awake and aware of what was going on. She too had done a lot of reading on people who were in vegetative states and she expected to find him still laying in bed and not really communicating. Here he was though visibly aware of what was going on and adding his own input.

"He really is. He still has a long way to go but he is amazing me with the progress he is making. He is going to need a lot of help with his speech and relearning it is not okay to hit when he is angry and confused," Jack stated. The Doctor rolled his eyes at Jack. He had only hit him once, maybe twice, but he felt that Jack deserved it at the time.

"Good, then maybe soon you can meet my son Luke. I have told him all about you and he is eager to come and visit you," Sarah Jane informed the Doctor. The Doctor looked at her curiously. "I adopted Luke about six months ago. He was created by the bane and so he is a lot like you. He is a genius and he puts ideas together quickly. You would like Luke."

"Yes," The Doctor agreed. His mind was reeling though. How long had he been with Jack if Sarah Jane had adopted a son six months ago. He was sure that it hadn't been that long since he last spoke to her since their reunion at the school. All he had been told was that he had been hurt but now he wondered how badly. He growled in frustration that he couldn't form the words to ask them. Sarah Jane misunderstood the growl though and picked up his tea to give him a drink.

"Well then the next time I come to visit, I will bring him with me." The Doctor sighed. He was really going to have to practice talking again. He had so many questions for the two of them and he expected answers.

The three of them sat down on the pier, just enjoying the weather and talking. The Doctor could not participate much which frustrated him but he could tell from watching Sarah Jane and Jack interact that they had become friends at some point. This bothered him even more about how long he had been with Jack. How much had he missed and if Jack didn't know what happened to Rose, then who did. He started to get irritated with Sarah Jane's story about a siltheen that her group had stopped recently. While it was a good thing, it wasn't answering any of his questions.

"Jack," He snipped and slapped the arm of the chair. Sarah Jane finished her sentence as Jack stood up and came closer to him.

"Yes Doctor?" Jack asked patiently. He reached up to smack Jack but Jack anticipated getting hit and caught the Doctor's hand with ease. "I am sorry something is upsetting you Doctor, but hitting me isn't going to get you your way. Now I know you are having trouble speaking but do you want to try to tell me what is bothering you?"

"Me why?" The Doctor questioned. He hated how childish the question sounded. He also hated the fact that Jack had spoke to him as if he were a child. He would have hit Jack just for that but Jack was still holding his wrist. A tiny voice was telling him that it was also childish to hit Jack. He ignored that voice though.

"Why are you down on the pier?" Jack on purposely misunderstood his question. It wasn't one that he was ready to answer.

"No, Jack. Me why?" The Doctor gestured to his head. He saw the flash of pain that crossed Jack's face before Jack tried to make his face blank again. The pain was still in his eyes though.

"You got hurt..."

"No," The Doctor growled interrupting him. That wasn't good enough. That didn't explain the time loss or why he couldn't remember what happened.

"Listen to me Doctor," Jack told him as calmly as he could. Kneeling down he made sure that he was eye level with the Doctor rather than looming over him. The Doctor glared at him. "You did get badly hurt and I promise you that I will tell you how. Just not yet and I want you to promise me that you aren't going to go looking for the answer." This wasn't a conversation that Jack had planned on having with the Doctor for some time yet. He still had a lot of healing to do both mentally and physically before he was ready to know what happened to him. The Doctor hadn't been awake that long and Jack was worried that he would retreat back into his mind if he was told now. He could see the Doctor's mind reeling though.

"Please Doctor," Jack practically begged him. He released the Doctor's wrist. The Doctor swung at him again and this time Jack made no move to stop him.

"Ape," The Doctor informed Jack as his hand connected.

"He only wants what is best for you," Sarah Jane said softly. The Doctor looked at her out of the corner of his eyes. "I agree with him though Doctor. You need to heal first."

The Doctor sighed loudly. His mind didn't work like a human's mind and he was sure he could handle whatever they were trying not to tell him. His mouth couldn't articulate this though. He was limited to his very poor vocabulary and that made him feel trapped. His voice and his words had got him out of trouble many times in the past and here he was unable to communicate without sounding like a child. His sigh turned into a slight growl and he turned to look out at the water, away from Jack.

"Doctor," Jack started.

"Give him a moment," Sarah Jane told Jack. Jack nodded and stood up. Going around he went to sit back on the bench beside her but she also stood. "Doctor we are going to be right down the pier if you need us." She took Jack's arm and half drug him down the pier, our of the range of the Doctor's hearing.

"I can't do it again Sarah," Jack whispered as he looked at the Doctor. The Doctor had shifted slightly but he was still staring out at the water ignoring them "I can't take care of him again, not knowing if he is ever going to come back." He knew that the words were true though. If he had to he would take care of the Time Lord until his dying day.

"I know Jack, but you can't hide it from his forever. I agree he is not ready now, but we can't be the ones to determine when he is. He is going to keep asking and keep pushing you until you tell him," Sarah Jane informed Jack and he nodded. For all the secrets that the Doctor had he really didn't like when they were kept from him. Especially when they involved him in any way. "And I will be here if you need me. You can call me at anytime and I will do my best to get down to Cardiff quickly so I can help you talk to him."

"Thank you Sarah Jane." Jack smiled. The two of them hugged briefly before heading back over to the Doctor.

"I have to get going so I can be home when Luke get's there. I will be back to visit though Doctor," Sarah Jane promised him. She gave him a hug and then waving goodbye to Jack, headed towards her car.

"Ready to go inside?" Jack questioned the Doctor.

"Yes," The Doctor replied.

"Have you forgive me?"

"Ape." Was the Doctor's only response. Not sure if that was a yes or a no, Jack collected their things and went around the Doctor's chair to take him inside. The Doctor was yawning as they headed back inside so Jack took him up to his office in hopes that the Doctor would take a nap and he could get some work done. The Doctor was slightly flush, making Jack realize they had been in the sun too long. The Doctor had also been quiet since they left the pier. Jack silently hoped that he wasn't trying to remember what happened to him and had taken their advice. He wasn't that lucky though. He turned on the telly quietly for the Doctor to watch as he sat down at his desk. He had just got settled when the Doctor spoke again.

"Jack?"

"Yes Doctor," Jack asked, keeping his voice soft.

"Why?" The Doctor wondered. Jack sighed as he looked up from his work. The Doctor had turned his head so he was watching Jack.

"Just let it go for now Doctor," Jack answered him.

"Why?"

"Because you need to trust Sarah Jane and I that you aren't ready to know what happened yet," Jack informed him.

"Why?" The Doctor asked again. Jack looked closely at the Doctor's eyes. They showed no confusion indicating that the Doctor knew exactly what was going on. Jack felt bad that he had been wishing for the Doctor to be confused so he could try to change the topic. With the Doctor's mind clear though he couldn't as easily.

"You need to just trust me on this. Now why don't we talk about something else or I can change the channel to something more interesting for you to watch," Jack suggested.

"No, why?" The Doctor stubbornly responded.

"I know how about a banana. It has been a few hours since you have eaten breakfast. I bet you are hungry," Jack tried.

"No, why?" Jack groaned.

"Is that all you can say?" Jack wondered.

"Yes, why?"

"Because I am not going to answer the question and irritating me isn't going to get you any answers," Jack snipped slightly. He was really wanting the drink of whiskey now.

"Why?" The Doctor questioned. His tone hadn't changed since the first time he had asked Jack and Jack found that even more frustrating.

"Stop it," He snapped angrily. He ran his hands down his face. As he did he saw the Doctor lick his lips.

"Why?" The Doctor said.

"That's it." Jack stood up and went around the desk. Taking the brakes off the Doctor's chair he pushed it out into the hub, parking him next to Gwen. "I need you to keep an eye on him for awhile." He turned and headed back to his office. Slamming the door behind him, he reached for the whiskey. He poured himself a large glass of it and then settled back behind his desk. He held the cup in his hand, not taking a drink of it as he thought about the Doctor. Sighing, after about a half an hour, he stood up and poured the whiskey back in the bottle. As much as he would like to get drunk and forget today, he still had the Time Lord to take care of.

Even though the Time Lord could frustrate him to no end, he was his responsibility. He couldn't push the Doctor away just because he had decided to push for answers and had no other way to ask then by saying why. He wasn't sure if he would start on Gwen but he didn't fear that she would tell him. He had all ready promised all his employees long ago that when the Doctor woke up, if they told him what happened, they would be fired and retconned. He meant it to. Going to the door he opened it again and looked out. Gwen was talking quietly to the Doctor and Jack saw the Doctor's head dropping towards his chest and then him lifting again as he fought going to sleep. He moved closer, still staying out of the Doctor's sight.

"We keep a weevil down in the cells now. Jack calls her Janet for some reason but we still don't know much about them," Gwen told him quietly. She looked up at Jack who shook his head.

"Jack," The Doctor whimpered.

"Just try to sleep now Doctor. When you wake up Jack will be there," Gwen tried to reassure the sleepy Time Lord. He wasn't having it though.

"Jack," He cried out louder. Gwen looked up at Jack and he hung his head for a moment before coming closer.

"I'm here now," Jack whispered softly as he approached the Doctor. "How about we get you into some clean jimjams and settled into your bed for a kip. Would you like that?"

"Yes," The Doctor replied. Jack took him though to his room. As he picked him up to place him on the bed though, he noticed how warm the Doctor still was. He got him into his pajama bottoms only and covered him in his comforter. Grabbing the thermometer he placed it in the Doctor's ear. The Doctor groaned at him.

"Shhh, I am just taking your temperature," Jack informed him. Removing it, it only took a glance to see that the Doctor's fever had gotten worse. Jack kicked himself silently for taking him out into the sun. He wanted to go and get Owen to check the Doctor over. The Doctor though had other plans. Once the thermometer was out of his ear, he smacked his lips and closed his eyes. Within moments his breathing evened out and he was asleep. Grabbing a book off the shelf behind him, Jack settled down to wait for the Time Lord to wake up again.

-DW-

The Doctor walked down a strange corridor that he had never seen before. The corridor was large with pure white walls. Even though he had never seen it before the place screamed of danger and he was terrified of it. He walked slowly cautiously down the corridor, heading to the large wall on the end. Rose was on the other side of that wall and if he could just reach it then maybe, just maybe, he might be able to feel her again for one moment. He laid his head against the wall feeling nothing but the cool wall against his cheek and hand. Disappointed he turned to head back to the TARDIS.

"Hello Doctor," A man with no face told him. In his grief he hadn't heard the man coming up behind him and he was startled to see him. He opened his mouth to respond. No words came out though as hands wrapped around his throat. He lifted his own hands up to try to get the hands off his neck as he struggled for breath. Stars danced in front of his eyes and his respiratory bi-pass was about to kick in when the man suddenly let go. He sank to the floor, trying to catch his breath, wheezing through he sore throat.

"Get up," The man demanded. The Doctor apparently didn't move fast enough as the man kicked him. "I said get up." The Doctor didn't get a chance to try though as a fist firmly connected with the side of his face, knocking him out cold.

-DW-

"Jack," The Doctor screamed as he woke up. "Jack, Jack Jack."

"Easy now, I am right here." Jack jumped up from his chair and wrapped his arms around the shivering Doctor. The Doctor tried to hold him back as tears streamed down his face and he trembled in fear. He couldn't hold Jack like he wanted to, so instead he gripped Jack's shirt in his hands, making sure that Jack couldn't leave him again. Jack gently caressed the side of the Doctor's head with one hand as he continued to hold him. "It was just a bad dream."

The Doctor knew it wasn't though. The details of the dream were fading but he could still see the faceless man. Why hadn't he just listened to Jack and Sarah Jane. He buried his face in Jack chest as he tried to forget. Jack realized that he was trapped and carefully eased himself up onto the bed. He held the Doctor tightly against him, making gentle shushing noises. The Doctor though wasn't calming down as he continued to cry and tremble against Jack. Jack wasn't sure how much time passed before the Doctor went limp in his arms, his breathing once again even after crying himself back to sleep.


	8. Chapter 8

When Martha came around for the Doctor's bi-weekly check up Jack was thankful to see her. It had been over a day and a half since the Doctor's nightmare and the Doctor had retreated into himself again. It wasn't as bad as when he was in the vegetative state but in a way it was also worse. There was no attempts at communication, no smiling or even acknowledgement that someone else existed. When he had first opened his eyes again after crying himself back to sleep Jack had feared the Doctor was completely gone again. His only reassurance that the Doctor's mind was still near the surface was the tight grip the Doctor had on his hand as he tried to get off the bed.

"I'm not going anywhere I promise," Jack reassured him as he squeezed the Doctor's hand back. He didn't realize how much he would miss the Doctor calling him ape until he wasn't anymore. The worse thing was that Jack had no idea how to help him. He had an idea why the Doctor was so quiet and that was that he had started to remember. The problem was he didn't know how much the Doctor had remembered. He didn't know if he would say the wrong thing and cause the Doctor to retreat even further into his mind. He felt helpless as he moved the Doctor around in a routine that he had developed while the Doctor was vegetative. He talked to the Doctor constantly and reassured him he was safe but it did little to ease the Time Lord's mind.

"Hello again Doctor," Martha said pleasantly as she entered the room. The Doctor was laying on the table holding Jack's hand and staring at the ceiling. He didn't even bother to look at her as she entered the room and she frowned.

"He had a setback," Jack explained. He reached out and stroked the Doctor's head gently.

"I can see that," Martha answered. Coming over to them she began her examination of the Doctor's vitals. "What caused it?"

"He was desperate for answers about what happened to him and I asked him to let it go but he wouldn't.." Jack started.

"You didn't tell him did you?" Martha interrupted sounding horrified.

"No. God no. He had a nightmare though where he remembered something and he has been like this a day and half now. I was hoping you could tell me how to help him?" Jack asked her desperately. Martha saw the Doctor look at Jack briefly before returning his eyes to the ceiling.

"Doctor. I know that you are afraid, but you are safe here with Jack and I. No one is going to hurt you and as scary as your nightmares are they can't hurt you either. So do you want to talk to us and tell us how you are feeling?" Martha wondered. She was talking to him using a special voice she normally reserved for her child patients. He rolled his eyes at her and she smiled. Continuing her examination she was happy to see that his vitals were all looking better. He still had a slight fever due to the infection in his bladder but she had brought pills with her that he could take for it. The general antibiotic injection he had received had helped though.

"You need to take one pill twice a day with your meal," Martha informed the Doctor.

"I will make sure he takes it," Jack told her taking the bottle. He put it in his pocket. Pulling his hand loose from the Doctors, he lifted him up and placed him back in his wheelchair.

"Just take your time with him Jack. He is going to have set backs but as long as he manages to overcome them and move forward then he is still on the same track. I know it is hard to see but he has reached goals all ready that I didn't expect him to make yet," Martha informed Jack.

"I know," Jack sighed. It was easier for Martha to tell him to be patient when she could go home and separate herself from the Doctor. His life on the other hand revolved around the Time Lord. He couldn't go home as the Doctor was his home. The thought didn't surprise him. He hadn't had a place he called home since he was a child on the Boshane Peninsula until he set foot on the TARDIS. He had places he lived but no place he would call a home. The Doctor had changed that though and a part of him hated the Doctor for leaving him alone on the Game Station but he would always love the Doctor more then he hated him. He couldn't help it. He waited until Martha was out of the room before kneeling down in front of the Doctor.

"I promise you that Martha is telling you the truth. I know it was more than a nightmare but he can't hurt you anymore Doctor. I don't know what to tell you to make this right but if being silent is going to make you feel better then you can be silent. But if you need to scream, I want you to scream. Don't hold it in because you are afraid." Jack kissed the Doctor on the forehead out of impulse. Leaning back he saw a slight scowl on the Doctor's face. He didn't regret his decision as he went around the chair again.

He wheeled the Doctor into the kitchen and began to fix their lunch. Since the Doctor was actually able to chew and swallow he was making something more elaborate then applesauce or oatmeal. He had the kitchen fixed up when he began residing at the hub full time with the Doctor and it was time that he put it to use Deciding on pasta for a change, he put a pot of water on the stove top to boil. Looking through the cupboards he tried to figure out what kind of sauce to put on it. It was obvious though that he needed to go shopping.

"Jack. Me tea," The Doctor asked so softly Jack almost missed it. Smiling Jack grabbed the kettle. Filling it with water he placed it on the stove top as well.

"Of course," Jack turned to look at him. The Doctor was watching him cook. "Do you like pasta?"

"Yes," The Doctor answered, his voice still barely above a whisper. Jack just rejoiced that he had decided to talk again. He made a simple cheese sauce for the pasta. Tasting it he made a face. It wasn't as good as his wife use to make. He added a lot more cheese to the sauce. Tasting it again he deemed it passing and added the cooked pasta. He poured the Doctor a cup of tea and then plated two dishes of food. Sitting down he helped the Doctor take a drink of the tea and then they started on their meal. It was once again a quiet as they both were lost in their thoughts.

The Doctor wasn't very hungry. He just wanted to be alone for awhile and be able to think. That was hard though with Jack sitting right next to him, trying to feed him. The noodle dish was good but he felt as though he was going to be sick if he kept trying to eat it. Jack though wasn't paying that close attention to him though as he was also lost in his own thoughts.

"Jack," He sighed as Jack lifted the fork again to give him another bite. He pressed his lips tightly together and turned his head away from the noodles.

"Not hungry?" Jack asked in concern. The Doctor had barely touched his meal. He reached out and put a hand on the Doctor's forehead. He still felt a little bit warm but nothing to bad.

"No," The Doctor answered. He cursed his limited vocabulary as he tried to think of a way to convey that he wanted to go to bed. "Me," he said finally and then faked a yawn.

"You're tired?" Jack questioned looking at the time as the Doctor nodded. It was a little early in the day for a nap but he wasn't going to stop the Doctor from sleeping if that is what he wanted to do. "All right let me do the dishes and then I will sit with you."

"No Jack, me," The Doctor informed him. He saw the hurt flash across Jack's eyes for just a moment. To Jack's credit though he didn't try to argue the Doctor. He took him down to his room and helped him into his bed. He was well aware at this point that the Doctor wasn't really tired but just wanted to be alone for awhile, so he didn't bother to change him into his pajamas. He debated leaving the Doctor alone but he couldn't stop the Time Lord from wanting a little independence.

"I am going to be in the hub if you need me. I will be back in a little while to check on you," Jack reassured the Doctor. He left the room closing the door behind him. The Doctor watched Jack go. He then turned to look at the picture of him and Rose together. He missed her. Though he cared about Jack it was Rose that had stolen his Time Lord hearts and held onto them as her own. He couldn't remember exactly what happened to her but he was sure that she was trapped somewhere that he couldn't reach her. Oh but how he wanted to. He just wanted to hold her for a while and have her smile up at him, reassuring him that everything would be all right, even when he knew it wouldn't. Once he was able to travel again, he was going to find her. Even if it was only for a moment so he could tell her goodbye.

He forced himself to turn away from the picture. That wasn't why he wanted to be alone. He wanted to be alone because he felt weak and helpless. He was no longer the Time Lord that had stood up to the Daleks, cybermen and countless other species. He alone had walked away from the Time War yet here he was laying helpless in a bed because some human had decided to hurt him. He couldn't even stop someone from coming into the room and killing him if they decided to. The only thing he could do was trust Jack to stop them. And he did trust Jack, he just didn't want to be reliant on Jack for the rest of the time that he was in this body.

His mind still felt foggy, though the fog was quickly lifting. Things that hadn't made since when he first opened his eyes in this room were becoming clearer. He could safely say he had seen Gwen before when the Gelth had tried to come through the rift after their planet had been destroyed in the Time War. Tosh hadn't been crazy when she told him about the pig that was like a mermaid. He remembered those things now, though the timing of them was still a little foggy in his mind. He also still didn't know how long he had been under Jack's care. He couldn't even ask Jack how long because his mouth was having trouble forming the words. He growled in frustration and hit the bed.

He took a deep breath. Getting angry was also not going to help him. He had to concentrate. Opening his mouth he began to make simple noises trying to form words. He sounded and felt like a child but at least no one was around to hear him.

"Dah," He managed to say instead of the word Doctor like he wanted. He couldn't help but groan at how ridicules it sounded. "Me dahdah," He said out loud. That would really scare the Daleks away, once they got done laughing at him. "Me Dahtah," He tried again. Closer but not what he wanted. Perhaps he should start with an easier word. He brushed the thought aside as he continued to practice.

-DW-

Jack went back to the kitchen feeling a little down about how easily the Doctor had dismissed him. He had been by the Time Lord's side constantly these last two years and now that he was awake he didn't want his company. He cleaned up the kitchen and then headed back to the Doctor's room to check on him. Through the door he could hear the Doctor making noises and growling in frustration.

"What is he doing?" Gwen asked softly as she came to Jack's side. She could also hear the Doctor and was wondering if there was some sort of strange Time Lord ritual she was unaware of. The thought that he was touching himself also briefly crossed her mind. If he was though, he was angry at himself.

"He is trying to talk," Jack whispered sadly. It was no wonder that the Doctor had pushed him away. He could hear the embarrassment and frustration in his voice as he just tried to say his own name. Jack placed a hand briefly on the Doctor's door before leading Gwen away to give the Time Lord his privacy.

Jack though checked on the Doctor several times. He stood outside the door listening him babbling away to himself. Jack didn't know whether to laugh or cry in those cases so instead he just walked away. It was when he came to the door and heard nothing that he finally opened it and looked in. The Doctor had fallen asleep and was snoring lightly. Jack smiled and went into the room. He carefully lifted the Doctor's legs and pulled the blanket out from beneath him. The Doctor didn't even stir as Jack covered him up, leaving him to take a kip. He didn't let him sleep long though as it was all ready late in the afternoon and it would soon be time to eat.

"Wake up Doctor," Jack cooed as he tried to wake to Doctor after just over an hour.

"No Jack, bah Jack," The Doctor moaned. He had been having a nice dream where he was back on the TARDIS with Rose and Jack. He was explaining to Rose why the waves of Woman's Wept had been frozen in time. She was listening to him, but he could see that she was more excited for a chance to go skating then the actual details of his story. Jack though was listening intently.

"Did you just call me bad?" Jack wondered. The Doctor nodded, happy that Jack had understood him because it sounded as though he had marbles in his mouth when he spoke. He originally thought that he was having trouble talking due to not talking for so long, but now he was beginning to wonder. It was as if there was a communication problem between his brain and his mouth. He knew what he wanted to say but getting his mouth to form the words was trickier then he anticipated.

"Yes, bah Jack," He commented again, trying to hide his head beneath the blankets. Jack though didn't budge. He pulled the blanket down and then lifted the Doctor out of his bed. He groaned unhappily as he was placed in his wheelchair and pushed towards the kitchen. The smell of food filled the air and Gwen was finishing plating for five. He was confused as he was pushed to the table next to a cup of tea, but his confusion was soon answered as Gwen, Owen and Tosh sat down to join them. He still wasn't happy about being taken out of his bed though when he wanted to sleep. So rather then participate in the dinner, he closed his eyes and drifted back to sleep.

"I'm sorry," Jack apologized to Gwen as the Doctor began to snore softly. Gwen had spent time making the dinner for the group to share in celebration of the Doctor waking up and her recent proposal to Rhys. Jack had offered to take them out to dinner, but she had felt that the Doctor would be more comfortable eating in the hub.

"It's all right," Gwen informed him. She wasn't insulted as she could see how tired the Doctor was when he came into the room. Jack excused himself and took the Doctor back to his room. The Time Lord didn't stir as he was changed into his jimjams and tucked back beneath the blankets on the bed. Jack closed the door behind him and went back to the kitchen to enjoy the meal with the others.

-DW-

"Jack," The Doctor called out from in his room. Looking at the time, Jack sighed. It was two in the morning and though he was awake anyways, he had been reading quietly enjoying the silence of the hub. The others had been around until eight and he had offered to clean up and sent them on their way home. Cleaning up took longer then he expected but by ten pm he had finished the dishes, showered and checked in on the sleeping Time Lord. He finished his sentence and marked the page he was on before heading into the Doctor's room.

"It's the middle of the night, you should be sleeping," Jack informed him softly as he entered the room. The Doctor rolled his eyes and made a rude noise with his mouth, letting Jack know exactly what he thought of conforming to Earth time. Jack laughed. He scooped the Doctor up off the bed and carried him through into the main part of the hub. "You missed dinner, are you hungry now?"

"Yes," The Doctor chuckled as Jack twirled and then rocked him upward before plopping him in a chair.

"Well I hope you are hungry because for your eating pleasure, we have a banana," Jack told him. "Followed by a curried chicken with tea and for dessert banana cream pie."

"Jack," The Doctor rolled his name playfully, making Jack smile again. He didn't even think about it as he dropped a kiss on the top of the Doctor's head before making his way to the kitchen. Though he had to reheat the curry it still tasted good and he dished up two plates of it. Returning to the Doctor's side he sat the food down. The Doctor looked at him confused, but Jack reached into his pocket, pulled out the banana. The Doctor laughed reaching for it.

"You thought I forgot didn't you," Jack told him.

"Yes," The Doctor agreed. Jack let him get a grip on the banana and helped him to bring it to his mouth. Simple foods the Doctor could learn to eat by himself again but Jack didn't think the Doctor would appreciate it if he wore a raincoat and made the Doctor wear a bib the first time he tried to use a spoon again. They would first build back up his muscles and get him use to the movements before going that far. For now the Doctor was eating a banana almost on his own and laughing. That was enough of an accomplishment to make Jack happy.

-DW-

The rest of the week was relatively quiet as the Doctor continued to adapt to his now limited lifestyle and Jack got use to him being awake and able to voice his needs. The Doctor was still extremely limited in his ability to talk but he was able to express himself a little more clearly. He was eating more then the three meals a day that Jack had been giving him and Jack wasn't sure if that was normal for him or just because there was little more he could do. He wasn't coordinated enough to write or type well so he was getting frustrated easily as well. Jack planned to get him out of the hub for a few hours on Saturday to head up to UNIT and visit the Brigadier.

It would have been easier for the Brigadier to come to Torchwood but Jack had his reasons for wanting to go to UNIT instead. He wanted to talk with the Brigadier and have Martha examine the Doctor to see if there was any exercises they could do with him to help him get his strength back up. There was also another doctor at UNIT who specialized in speech and Jack was hoping that he could work with the Doctor to help him relearn how to talk. So rather then putting several people out of the way for the day, he figured he would just take the Doctor to UNIT as he had done a few times in the past. Looking at the time, Jack realized that the Doctor had decided to sleep in today. That would have been fine on a normal day but they needed to get going soon. Standing up Jack headed to the Doctor's room to wake him.

-DW-

The Doctor was having a nice dream. Well better than nice. In his dream he was on new Earth with Rose and they were laying on his coat. Unlike the time they had gone there, Rose's naked body was beneath him and their two bodies were moving as one. He leaned down to kiss her lips as she cried out his name. He tensed slightly as he felt a hand on his back.

"Mind if I join in?" Jack whispered seductively in his ear. He shook his head no. He felt Jack pushing firmly into his body and groaned at the sensation as the three of them began to move together. He couldn't hold off long as the sensations became too much and he found his release deep inside Rose. Jack continued to move inside of him trying to find his own release. He felt Jack lean down and kiss the back of his neck.

"Doctor it's time to wake up," Jack whispered in his ear as he continued to move.

"No," The Doctor whimpered. He felt a hand shaking him and the dream faded to the reality that he was still within the Torchwood hub. He opened his eyes wide, finding that he had ejaculated recently from his dream. The Doctor was mortified. He hadn't found release in his sleep since he was a teenager back on Gallifrey. Seeing that he was awake, Jack pulled the covers down to start getting him ready for the day. It took a little coordination but the Doctor hid his face behind his arm as Jack began to remove his trousers to get him cleaned up and changed. He had no doubt that Jack would know exactly what the fluid was and would comment on it.

Jack didn't comment though. He knew something was wrong when the Doctor hid his face. He had never done that before and Jack was worried that he had did something wrong. He hadn't made any advances on the Doctor so he wasn't sure why the Doctor was suddenly shy about Jack changing him. He knew right away what the problem was when he found the white fluid on the Doctor and though he was surprised to see it, he kept his comments to himself. He wasn't about to scare the Doctor or have him try to run from him after he had worked so long to take care of him. He was shocked though that the Doctor had wet dreams and wondered who the dream was about.

"We are going to UNIT today to visit the Brigadier and you have an examination scheduled with Martha as well as another doctor named James. He is going to work with you on relearning how to talk. So I was thinking you could wear your brown suit today. How does that sound?" Jack asked him softly as he finished cleaning him up. The Doctor peeked out from underneath his arm.

"K," The Doctor said softly. Jack could see the embarrassment in his eyes and knew that he had made the right choice by not saying anything. He dressed the Doctor in his brown suit with a light blue undershirt forgoing the tie. Lifting the Doctor up, he carefully placed him in his wheelchair and pushed him through to the kitchen. The Doctor refused to make eye contact with him the entire time he ate his breakfast of oatmeal and drank his tea.

"Doctor, look at me," Jack told him.

"No," The Doctor replied, keeping his eyes lowered.

"What happened last night in your dreams is nothing to be ashamed of. You were having..." Jack started

"Jack," The Doctor rolled his name in embarrassment as he continued to look down.

"A good dream and it happened. I am not going to try to take advantage of you or push you because you dream like everyone else does," Jack continued, ignoring the interruption. "I am not the same man that you left on the game station all those years ago. I have changed for the better. I run Torchwood as a legitimate place and don't con people anymore. I also haven't had sex with anyone or thing for the last two years." That got the Doctor's attention and his head shot up. He looked Jack straight in the eyes surprised.

"Why?" He questioned as he could see Jack was telling him the truth.

"Because the last person I trusted that much, ruined my trust in the worst way possible," Jack admitted, deciding to be honest with the Doctor. "Since then I haven't wanted to invite anyone to my bed." He didn't want to talk about it anymore and have the Doctor push for answers. They had to get going anyways so he stood up and went around the chair to take the Doctor out to the SUV. Before he would leave the Doctor in his chair and buckle it into the special seat he had put in. This time though he lifted the Doctor out and placed him in the passenger side.

"Are you going to be all right if I buckle you in?" Jack asked him.

"Yes," The Doctor answered softly. Jack buckled him in and the Doctor tensed. Fear flashed across his face and he fought against the seat belt. Jack rubbed his arm comfortingly but the Doctor thrashed several times before passing out. Jack waited for him to come back around before moving from his side. The Doctor realized he was restrained in the seat again as he came to and immediately his breathing sped up again.

"You're all right," Jack reassured him, taking his hand. The Doctor gripped it tightly as he managed to calm down. Once he was breathing normally again, Jack removed his hand and closed the door. He went around the SUV to put the wheelchair in and then got in the driver's side. By the time he entered the Doctor had passed out again. He came to fairly quickly and gripped Jack's hand tightly as he pulled out of the hub parking lot. Jack released his hand long enough to turn on the stereo as it was going to be an interesting ride up to UNIT.


	9. Chapter 9

The Doctor had been doing well most of the trip up to UNIT. He held tightly to Jack's hand as he watched the scenery change out the SUV window. Occasionally a whimper would escape but over all he had calmed down. That was until Jack had to stop fast. The seat belts tightened and the Doctor went into a full on panic attack. With in moments he was screaming and kicking out, his hands grasping to get the seat belt off of him or to get the door open. Jack pulled off to the side of the road as he made gentle shushing noises. Leaning over the Doctor he eased the seat back a little so the belt was no longer touching his chest.

"Easy now Doctor, you're all right," Jack cooed softly. Tenderly he brushed the hair back from the Doctor's face. Without warning the Doctor turned his head and clamped his teeth down tightly on Jack's hand. Jack cried out in surprise pulling away. His hand felt bruised and they were was blood pooling in the teeth marks the Doctor had left.

"Shit," Jack swore as he grabbed a handkerchief. He wrapped it around his hand to try to staunch the bleeding. He would heal quickly and in a few hours the bite would just be a memory but at the moment it really hurt. He jumped as he heard a tap on his window. Looking over he saw a police officer standing there. Jack sighed. He rolled down the window so he could speak to the officer.

"Is everything all right?" The officer asked as he looked in. The Doctor had stopped screaming at least and now was hyperventilating.

"He is having a panic attack, so I pulled over to calm him down," Jack explained. "I am from Torchwood and am taking him up to UNIT. If I may?" He reached slowly for his pocket. The Officer nodded and took a step back as Jack pulled his ID out and opened it. It showed his special clearances along with his ID. The office examined it a moment, before handing it back to Jack.

"Would you like me to call an ambulance for him?" The officer questioned as the Doctor passed out.

"No, he will wake up and be fine in a moment," Jack reassured the officer. The man nodded unsure, but he had no jurisdiction over Torchwood and Jack hadn't been breaking any laws. He left and Jack rolled up the window again.

"Jack," The Doctor moaned softly as he started to wake up again.

"Just keep your eyes closed. We are almost to UNIT," Jack reassured him. He put a comforting hand on the Doctor's leg.

"K," The Doctor whimpered. He didn't feel good and just wanted out of the SUV. He kept his eyes closed the rest of the ride, just listening to the music on the radio and feeling the car move. He held Jack's hand tightly the entire time, not willing to relinquish the comfort he got from it. When the arrived at UNIT, Jack quickly checked them in and then parked the SUV to walk the rest of the way. Going around he got the Doctor's wheel chair first and then lifted the Time Lord out of the SUV. The Doctor wrapped his arms around Jack's neck refusing to let go.

"I am not going anywhere I am just going to put you in your chair," Jack cooed softly lowering him. The Doctor held on and as Jack straightened up again the Doctor went with him. Jack gave in. He wrapped his arms around the Doctor, holding him upright as he made gentle shushing noises.

"Hello Old Chap," The Brigadier said happily as he got close. The guards at the gate had sent word of the Doctor's arrival and he had come down to meet him. The Doctor smiled happily at him. "You seem to get younger every time I see you."

"No," The Doctor disagreed. He didn't feel that young. He was also wondering how many times the Brigadier had seen him. It was another mystery like Sarah Jane and he was no closer to the answer then he had been about a week ago. He didn't like not knowing.

"Well then I understand that you are here for two appointments, but how about a nice cuppa first," The Brigadier offered. The Doctor nodded eagerly. He finally allowed Jack to lower him into his chair and together the three of them walked over to the officer's quarters. The Brigadier put the kettle on the oven and found a box of jammy dodgers to go with the tea. He set them down in front of the Doctor.

"Me Jack," The Doctor asked happily as he pointed at the biscuits. Jack smiled and took one. He handed it to the Doctor who clumsily lifted it to his mouth and took a bite. The Brigadier watched him from the kitchen. It was hard to see his friend struggling just to feed himself. He poured three cups of tea and brought them over. Jack didn't even let the Doctor attempt to hold his own cup as he lifted it for the Doctor. The Doctor took a drink.

"Ah," He sighed happily as the sweet liquid filled his mouth.

"Good," The Brigadier chuckled.

"Yes," The Doctor agreed. He bit another of the biscuits.

"When you are feeling better, your old job of scientific adviser is still available if you are interested," The Brigadier informed him.

"May be," The Doctor answered. He wasn't really that interested at coming up to UNIT every day from Cardiff. He hadn't enjoyed the drive at all and he knew that Jack wasn't going to let him drive the TARDIS until he was fully healed. He thought about maybe then working for UNIT but he also knew that he would be traveling the stars again once he was healed and wouldn't want to stay in London.

"Did you review the paperwork I gave you?" Jack asked, not elaborating as he didn't want the Doctor to know what they were talking about.

"Yes and based on the confession, my legal time has decided to carry out your sentence of life in prison. He will be formally charged on Monday as long as he continues to plead guilty and then transferred to a long term prison facility," The Brigadier advised Jack.

"I don't think he is going to retract his statement as there is to much evidence against him. The DNA along would at least get him a few years in prison," Jack told the Brigadier.

"Why?" The Doctor questioned, showing that he was paying attention to their conversation. He looked from Jack to the Brigadier and then back to Jack as they didn't answer him.

"Because he did a very bad thing and we are trying to make sure that he stays off the streets so that he can't hurt anyone else," Jack informed him. Reaching out he squeezed the Doctor's arm. "Now don't worry about it anymore. Instead why don't you think about what we are going to do after your examinations. We could head back to the hub, but I am sure if you ask nicely the Brigadier will have Martha show you around the improved science department." The Doctor rolled his eyes. He wasn't a child and couldn't be distracted that easily. At least he hoped not.

"We need to get you to the clinic, Martha is going to be wondering where you are," Jack informed the Doctor as he looked at his watch. He had only meant to stay a half an hour with the Brigadier, but almost an hour later and two packs of Jammie Dodgers and they were still visiting with him. The Doctor looked at Jack, making a rude noise with his mouth in the process. Biscuit went all over the table. "That's disgusting," Jack made a face.

"No." The Doctor shrugged, showing he didn't care. He put another biscuit in his mouth as Jack cleaned up the mess so the Brigadier didn't have to.

"Be nice to Jack he has taken good care of you," The Brigadier laughed. The Doctor turned to look at him. He swallowed his mouth full of food and then reached for the tea. The Brigadier helped him to take a drink.

"Why?" The Doctor asked once his mouth was clear. The Brigadier looked at Jack.

"Come on," Jack sighed rather than answering. He released the breaks on the wheels and pushed the Doctor out of the door before he could protest. The Doctor wasn't happy he was being treated like a child again and not receiving the answers he wanted, but he had managed to grab several biscuits before he was made to leave. He snacked on them happily as he was pushed across the UNIT grounds to their medical facility. Solider's saluted him as they went by making him feel uneasy. He didn't like being saluted and never felt as though he deserved it. They went into the clinic where Martha was all ready waiting for them.

"I was just about to come and find you," She informed the Doctor as they walked in.

"Sorry we got sidetracked," Jack answered for him.

"I can see that," Martha told him as she noticed the handful of biscuits the Doctor had. "I am happy to see that you are able to feed yourself now. That is a lot of progress in a short time."

"Simple foods. He can't manage a fork or a spoon well yet," Jack clarified for Martha. She nodded her understanding.

"We will have you eating on your own again soon enough. Now if you will follow me, I want to run an MRI as well as a CT scan so we can see what we are dealing with," Martha informed. She led them down to a small room where Jack helped the Doctor change into a hospital gown. Rather than strapping him down and causing another panic attack, she allowed Jack to sit with him as they scanned his head. She was surprised to see how active his brain had once become in the short time since he woke up.

"Jack?" The Doctor asked, sounding uneasy as they continued to run the scans.

"I'm right here," Jack reassured him reaching out and squeezing his leg. He left his hand in place as Martha finished the scans and then came back into the room to get the Doctor.

"How did you get that bruise Jack," Martha questioned as she saw the hand resting on the Doctor's leg. Jack looked at his hand. The teeth marks had faded but the skin was still almost black with green tinges at the edges. He lifted his hand as the Doctor came out of the machine.

"He had a panic attack on the way up here and bit me," Jack informed her. The Doctor shrugged when Martha looked at him. He didn't remember biting Jack. He lifted his arms slightly and Jack picked him up. He held on tightly to Jack, not allowing himself to be put back in the wheel chair after the scan. He didn't like the machine. Jack carried him through to the examination room, as Martha pushed his wheelchair behind them. Jack carefully laid him on the table in the room.

"Your brain scans look good. I am surprised how much progress you have made in a short time. I will review them in more detail after you leave and we can go over them when I come in for your twice weekly examination. For now though Jack has asked I see if there are any stretches and exercises you can do so we can get your strength up. Is that all right?" Martha asked the Doctor.

"Yes," he agreed. He wasn't sure how much she could do though, being that he wasn't human. She surprised him though by stretching his arms based on his unique muscle structure, taking into account that he had more movement and dexterity then a human would. He looked questioningly towards Jack and Jack realized that he could only avoid the Doctor's question of why for so long. The Doctor knew there were things he wasn't being told and it was obvious he was beginning to put the information he was receiving together. If they didn't answer his questions soon, he would end up coming to his own conclusions.

"Besides being able to eat on your own, are you able to do anything else on your own yet?" Martha asked as she finished with his legs.

"Yes," The Doctor told her happily. He pushed himself yo so that he wasn't laying flat anymore. He wasn't able to sit up on his own, but he could hold himself up once he was sitting.

"Good job. Can you come up just a little further?" Martha asked him. He tried but he couldn't do it. "That's all right," Martha reassured him as he started to get frustrated. He flopped backwards on the bed, unhappy with how little he could sit up.

"You did really well," Jack told him.

"Ape," The Doctor mumbled as he turned away.

"So is there anything I can do to help him?" Jack questioned as the Doctor sulked.

"I am going to compile a list of stretches and exercises he can do. For now you can run through the ones I did with him today at least twice a day to help him get his muscle tone back up," Martha answered Jack. She went around the bed and knelt down so she was close to the Doctor's face. "Regardless of how unhappy you are with your progress, you are showing remarkable progress. You just need to be patient for a little while longer. I am sure that you are going to surprise us all with how quickly you get back on your feet."

"K," The Doctor sighed. Martha squeezed his hand gently before turning to Jack once more.

"Is there anything else you need from me before I bring Doctor James in to evaluate your speech?" Martha questioned.

"Would it be possible for you to give him a sedative for the drive back to Cardiff?" Jack asked Martha. He really wasn't looking forward to the three hour drive back with an anxious Time Lord.

"Do you really think that is the best thing for him?" Martha wondered narrowing her eyes. She was slightly worried about Jack's eagerness to drug the Doctor rather then taking care of him on the way back. The Doctor answered for Jack by nodding his head eagerly. Sleeping the entire way back to Cardiff sounded a lot better then the ride back. "All right," Martha relented. "I will give you pills before you leave."

"Thank you," Jack told her. She shook her head as she left the room. Stopping by the door she saw Jack lean down and gently give the Doctor a hug. The Doctor lifted his arms to cling onto him, relishing in the contact. Less worried she went to find James.

-DW-

The Doctor started off well talking to James as James tried to help him to learn to talk again. James though didn't know how much the Doctor really couldn't say. He didn't know the Doctor spoke thousands of languages without the help of the TARDIS and more with her translating. The Doctor prided himself on his ability to talk his way of situations and using his voice to help others. The fact that he was relearning English first also bothered him as Gallifreyan was his first language but there was no way James would be able to pronounce a lot of the words. So rather then the Doctor feeling more confidant as the session went on he was getting grumpy and quickly.

"You almost had it. Let's try that again," James encouraged as they worked on the alphabet together. James hadn't been sure where to start with the Doctor when he first entered the room. He had the Doctor run through the list of words that he could say clearly then the few words he was struggling with. After that the two of them had gone over the letters the Doctor was able to pronounce. It was when they started with the letters the Doctor couldn't say, that the anger had began. So rather then trying again like James wanted, The Doctor rolled his eyes at him.

"No," The Doctor told James. He crossed his arms, looking around the room for Jack. Jack was pretending to ignore them as he sat reading a magazine on the other side of the room. He didn't meet the Doctor's eyes as he stayed focused on the same page that he had been reading for the last ten minutes.

"Doctor, I know it is hard but you almost had it. Now just try again. F," James said, over pronouncing the letter.

"Jack," The Doctor called out, done with James. Jack flipped the page in the magazine. "Jack," The Doctor snapped, slamming his hand down on his chair. Jack sat down the magazine and came over to his friend. He knelt down in front of the Doctor.

"You still have twenty minutes left with James. Now you either continue to work with him, while I read quietly, or I will leave the room and let you talk to him alone," Jack told the Doctor firmly. The Doctor raised his hand as though he was going to hit Jack. Jack waited as the Doctor put his hand back on the chair instead as he glared at him.

"K," The Doctor whispered. He turned to look at James. Rather than trying to pronounce the letter F, he moved on to the next letter. Jack smiled, starting to move back to his own chair. The Doctor didn't even look at him as he reached out and caught Jack's arm with his hand, holding on to Jack's coat. Jack chuckled, then removed the Doctor's hand. He kissed the Doctor's knuckles before heading back to his own chair. At exactly twenty minutes the Doctor stopped talking to James again. "Jack," he called out happily.

"Yes?" Jack questioned, looking up from his magazine. The Doctor pointed at the clock and Jack saw that his session was over. "You could be nice to James."

"No." The Doctor shook his head. He bounced a little in his sit as he started to squirm. "Jack, Jack, Jack." He repeated over and over again.

"He is free to go. I have another patient coming in," James laughed. "You did very well today though Doctor. I want you to keep working on the sounds that are harder for you and though you may not like the letter F, it is a good one to relearn as well." The Doctor stuck his tongue out at James. "Jack if you want to schedule another appointment for him, I have openings next week."

"I will do that because regardless of whether or not he wants to be here, I could hear the improvement he was making," Jack answered more for the Doctor than for James. He pushed the Doctor out to the receptionist desk and scheduled the Doctor for a one hour session with James every Friday for the next month. It would mean having to come up to UNIT every week, but Jack saw the benefit in it. He could have Martha examine the Doctor on Friday's as well so she only had to make one trip a week to Cardiff rather than two. In the meantime Jack was just going to have to work with the Doctor to get use to being buckled in with out having a panic attack.

"Want a tour of the base?" Jack asked, leaning over the chair slightly so that he could see the Doctor.

"No," The Doctor answered. He yawned as he did. It had been a three hour trip up, then with his examinations and visit with the Brigadier, he had been up for almost six and a half hours without a nap and with three panic attacks. He was exhausted. He was a little upset with himself because as a Time Lord he shouldn't need to sleep so much, but he also knew that he was still recovering from whatever had happened to him.

"How about a nice sleeping pill then with a hot cuppa? Then when you wake up you will be back at Torchwood in your own bed," Jack offered. The Doctor smiled.

"Yes." He nodded happily agreeing to the second offer. Jack messaged Martha and she met them at the Brigadier's with two pills. She gave them to Jack who helped the Doctor to take them. There wasn't much talk as he drank his tea waiting for the pills to take effect. As soon as they did though his natural instinct was to fight it. Jack though was ready to leave.

"Come here Doctor," Jack cooed softly upon seeing the Doctor trying to force his eyes open more. As gently as he could, he picked the Doctor up out of his wheelchair and placed him on his lap. He cuddled the Doctor close to him, rubbing his back in a soothing circular motion.

"Jack," The Doctor moaned softly as he turned further into him. He nuzzled Jack's neck with his head as he relaxed under his touch. His eyes drifted closed and soon after his breathing evened out.

"I will help you get his chair into the car," The Brigadier whispered.

"Thank you for everything," Jack responded standing up. He carried the Doctor to the SUV, carefully laying him in the passenger seat. He put the seat back as far as it could go to make the Doctor more comfortable on the ride back to Cardiff. He buckled the Doctor in and made sure the wheel chair was secured before starting back.

Upon arriving at the hub. Jack didn't even try to wake the Time Lord. He carried him through to his room and laid him on his bed. It was easy for him to change him into his jimjams without disturbing him. The Doctor though stretched slightly, trying to turn on his side as his trousers were being changed. Jack finished changing him quickly and then tucked him into his bed to sleep off the rest of the pills. He though wouldn't get a chance to rest as even though it was Saturday there was still work to do within the hub.


	10. Chapter 10

Jack was in the middle of tracking an unknown species when he heard the Doctor moan. He tried to ignore him and hoped the Doctor would go back to sleep so he could keep working. This wasn't the first time the creature had appeared on his radar but they had lost it every time before now. Jack wasn't about to let that happen again. He had his full team in the field and they were quickly gaining ground.

"Gwen in about 10 meters you and Tosh should come to a fork in the road. Turn left," Jack told him through the ear pieces they wore. "Owen keep heading straight for now."

"Yes sir," Gwen replied.

"Message received," Owen responded. Jack leaned forward in his chair studying the map and looking for any place he could send Owen to the right. If he didn't find one soon the only choice would be to waste time having Owen turn around. He wanted to avoid that if at all possible because he was trying to corner the creature while keeping it away from the city.

"Jack," The Doctor whimpered loudly from his room.

"I'll be there in just a moment," Jack called back, cursing slightly at the Doctor's timing. He found the road he was looking for and radioed its location to Owen. Standing up, he hurried to the Doctor's room, hoping to just get him and get back out to the computers. The minute he walked into the room though, he knew why the Doctor sounded upset. The room smelled of sick. The Doctor himself was pale and shivering despite being covered by his warm comforter.

"You ate too many Jammie Dodgers didn't you?" Jack questioned as he walked over to the bed. The Doctor nodded, looking miserable as he lifted his arms for Jack to get him out of the bed. Jack obliged him, setting him in his wheel chair, before stripping off his sweat soaked shirt. Getting a wet cloth he wiped the Doctor's face and chest down, then put a new shirt on him. Then came the task he really didn't like but had no choice to perform. He cleaned up the mess the Doctor made.

"If you feel sick again, call me so I can give you a bucket," Jack gagged.

"Da-di-di," The Doctor stuttered trying to get the word out.

"You did," Jack sighed and the Doctor nodded. Jack stood leaning over to kiss the Doctor on the head. "Then I am sorry I didn't listen. I have a project I need to get back to, but you can come and sit with me. I will also get you a cup of tea to calm your stomach as well as a bowl of chicken soup."

"K," The Doctor answered. He didn't want to be in his chair but he didn't complain as Jack pushed him over to the rift computers. On the screens he could see several maps as well as dots moving towards a central location. Jack's team was out trying to catch something, but what they were after was also moving. While Jack made his tea, the Doctor worked out that at the angle the unknown creature was heading, that Jack's team would miss it. The only way to catch it was to have Owen get back on the main road and have Gwen's team push it in that direction. It was still a long shot but would give Jack a better opportunity. Now the problem was trying to convey his idea to Jack.

"Here you are," Jack cooed as he helped the Doctor take a sip of the tea.

"Jack," The Doctor pointed at the maps. "No."

"I am sorry we have to catch it. It has been wrecking havoc in the area for six months now," Jack apologized. He picked up the spoon for the soup and offered the Doctor a bite. He took it but then pointed at the maps again.

"No," he said again, this time pointing to the blip that represented Owen. He moved his hand slowly so that it pointed back to the main road.

"I just got him off the main road because I am trying to corner the creature here," Jack explained. He pointed to a small clearing in the woods. The Doctor sighed. The creature would be long past the clearing before Jack's team ever reached it. He took another bite of the soup as he continued to stare at the map.

"No ape. See," He pointed again. The creature was quickly getting to the clearing and Jack's team was no where close.

"Shit," Jack realized what the Doctor was seeing. Grabbing the radio he flicked it on. "Owen turn around and get back to the main road as quick as you can. Gwen, I need you to speed up. The creature is going to get away unless you can push it away from the clearing towards the main road."

"Are you sure Jack," Tosh's voice spoke up.

"It's the only way," Jack told her as he looked at the Doctor. The Doctor nodded his agreement. "Now move."

"On it," Owen radioed back. Jack smiled as he turned towards the Doctor.

"Thank you. I almost missed that." The Doctor rolled his eyes. "Okay I did miss that. Now let's finish your dinner and then you can help me guide them." The Doctor nodded again and ate the rest of the soup. The hot liquid calmed his stomach and made him feel relaxed. He yawned, leaning his head against Jack's shoulder as they sat side by side staring at the screen. It took almost an hour but Jack's team was finally able to corner the creature they were chasing.

"It's a bloody cat," Gwen's voice came over the radio.

"A cat couldn't think the way this thing does," Tosh disagreed.

"Well it looks like a bloody cat then," Gwen spat. They had just spent several hours chasing what looked like a common house cat. She was tired and just wanted to head home to Rhys.

"Bring it in anyways," Jack told his team. He turned his head to look at the Doctor. "Do you think it is only a cat?"

"No," The Doctor yawned.

"Me either," Jack responded.

Jack worked on reports quietly while the Doctor waited, excited for the cat to come back to the hub. He had a few ideas of what the creature might be but he wouldn't know for sure until he was able to examine it himself. Even though he was tired he forced himself to a little taller in his chair so that Jack wouldn't try to put him back to bed. Though he knew that Jack had his best interest in mind, he looked forward to the day he could take himself to bed again when he was tired or tell Jack wanted he wanted to eat. He was sick of oatmeal but he was positive he would be having it for breakfast tomorrow. His stomach flipped at the thought of food and he groaned.

"Jack," He moaned.

"Yes Doctor," Jack asked looking up. He moved his hand to his stomach. Jack noticed the gesture and how pale he was. He grabbed the nearby trash bin and held it up just in time. The Doctor coughed and gagged as his stomach rejected all of the soup he had eaten. He groaned as he gagged again.

"ugh," he managed as he sat up a little.

"Are you done?" Jack wondered softly as he looked at the miserable Time Lord. His eyes were red and he had tears on his face from getting sick. The Doctor nodded, no longer trying to hold himself up. He slumped in the chair as Jack left the room for a moment. The thought of going to bed again was sounding better and better but he was bound and determined to stay up. Jack returned a moment later, taking in the Doctor's appearance. He wanted to send the Doctor to bed but he knew that would crush the Doctor's spirit. Instead he knelt down in front of him, and wiped his face with a warm cloth.

"There is that better?" Jack questioned as he finished.

"Yes" The Doctor sighed. Jack reached into his pocket and pulled out a packet of polos. Opening them he decanted several onto the table near the Doctor. The Doctor reached out gratefully and took one, placing it into his mouth.

"When Owen get's here I am just going to have him run a quick examination to make sure that your infection healed up and that isn't what is causing you to be sick," Jack explained to the Doctor. The Doctor nodded, he was still taking antibiotics for the infection, but there was no point in trying to argue Jack. He didn't have the vocabulary at the moment to get his point across. Instead it was just easier for him to agree now and have Owen confirm he ate to much so that Jack would stop worrying.

Jack sat down next to him again. He lifted his head to rest it on Jack's arm, not worrying about the fact he looked tired. He felt exhausted. Jack though went back to his paper work, just letting him rest. He took comfort in the warmth of Jack's arm. He needed to be touched and held in this body more then any of his others. He blamed Rose for that. He pushed the thought of Rose away as he tried not to dwell on how much he missed her again. She was always a thought at the back of his mind as he wondered if she was happy wherever she was. He reached his hand up, trying to take Jack's as he just needed someone to hold on to. Jack gently gripped his hand back and he held on as tightly as he could.

"I've got you," Jack reassured him. Jack kissed him softly on the head and he found himself trying to cuddle closer to Jack. His wheel chair arm was in the way though causing him to growl in frustration. Jack looked over at the growl and saw the way the Doctor was sitting. Laying down his own work he picked the Doctor up, carrying him over to the couch. He sat the Doctor down on it first, then sat down beside him. Lifting his arm he wrapped it around the Doctor's shoulders, pulling him in close. "Is that better?"

"Yes," The Doctor sighed as he snuggled up closer relishing in being held. It was such a small gesture on Jack's part but it meant a lot to the Doctor. He rested his head on Jack's chest, listening to his heart and just breathing in the familiar scent. As much as he wanted to stay up, he found was quickly loosing his battle with consciousness. At the moment that seemed all right though. Jack would make sure that the cat was still there when he woke up. He let his eyes drift closed and had just about given in when he felt another mind tapping against his.

He opened his up as the door to the hub opened. Jack's team entered with a pet carrying cage. Inside the cage was the cat. They were right that it looked like an earth cat, but the Doctor was sure that it wasn't. It was a Dejinshen from the planet... Well the Doctor couldn't remember the name of the planet at the moment but that didn't matter. The creature was only a few years old and probably terrified because it was separated from its family group. He could feel its mind reaching out to them but it wouldn't of course receive an answer.

"Here is your blood cat. I am going to bed," Gwen informed Jack testily.

"Have a good night Gwen. You can go to Tosh, I just need Owen to stay back a moment," Jack informed the trio. Tosh quickly left behind Gwen before Jack could change his mind and make her stay as well. She was tired to but better at not showing it. Jack carefully eased his way out of the Doctor's arms and went over to the cage.

"Did you need something sir?" Owen asked as he sat the cage down.

"The Doctor has been sick to his stomach tonight. He ate a lot of Jammie Dodgers earlier and I was just hoping you could give him something to calm his stomach before you left," Jack explained surprising the Doctor. Owen nodded.

"I have an anti-emetic I can give him." Owen left the room and returned with a pill. "Just hold this under your tongue and let it melt," He informed the Doctor. The Doctor opened his mouth, letting Owen place the pill inside it.

"If he is still feeling bad tomorrow I will have you examine him. For now though you can head home for the night." Jack dismissed Owen. "I do expect a full report on my desk tomorrow about the capture of the creature."

"Will do," Owen answered as he left. Once the hub was empty Jack turned to the Doctor.

"Do you know what we are dealing with because I am beginning to think the rest of them are right and it is a cat," Jack sighed in disappointment.

"Yes," The Doctor voiced. He tried to figure out how to tell Jack what it was. Seeing the keyboard he pointed at it. "Me Jack," He exclaimed.

"You want the computer?" Jack asked. He nodded happily. Picking him up Jack carried him back to the computers and sat him down in front of it. The Doctor reached up for the keyboard. He had to go slow and concentrate as he hit a letter. A few times he hit the wrong one and would tell Jack no, until Jack erased it, then he would try again. Until finally the word Dejinshen was on the screen.

"See Jack!" He exclaimed happily as he pointed at the word then to the cat.

"I have never heard of them. Are they dangerous?" Jack asked the Doctor in concern.

"No," the Doctor answered. Jack eyed him for a moment not sure if he should believe the Doctor. The Doctor though wasn't stupid and he was proving that while his vocabulary and body may not be working properly, his mind was. Jack leaned down and opened the cage. The cat shot out of it, immediately hiding. The Doctor laughed as he watched it run off.

"I will get it some food and it will come out again. Now that your cat is here let's get you to bed," Jack stated. He took the Doctor into his room and tucked him into bed.

"Jack me?" The Doctor asked patting the bed beside him.

"Are you sure?" Jack questioned, not wanting to push anything.

"Yes," The Doctor answered. Jack toed his shoes off before climbing up on to the Doctor's bed. He lay down next to him so that he could cuddle the Time Lord close. It didn't take long for the Doctor to fall asleep in his arms, but Jack didn't sleep as he just lay there listening to him breathe.

-DW-

The corridor was larger then he previously remember as he stood with his face pressed against the cool wall. Rose had lost her grip, he knew that now with a clarity that he didn't have before. He had watched in horror as she flew towards an opening the rift and was caught at the last moment by a man that he didn't recognize. That man had disappeared, taking Rose with him. He was sure that he should have known who the man was but the day leading up to now was still fuzzy. Rose though was safe, though he would never be able to see her again. He turned to move away from the wall, back to the TARDIS to carry on once again alone.

"Hello Doctor," He was slammed hard against the wall as hands wrapped around his neck, forcing the air out his lungs. The man with no face squeezed his neck tightly. He tried desperately to get the man to let go as he struggled not to go into respiratory bi-pass. He was still close to it kicking in when the man finally let go. He collapsed to the ground, holding his throat as he wheezed. The air felt good going into his lungs, but it hurt his throat as he gasped in the cool air.

"Get up," the man demanded his voice deathly calm. He tried to follow the man's orders but he was kicked hard in the stomach before he even had a chance to move. His stomach flipped and he let out all the air he had in his lungs once more as he cried out in pain. He bent forward gagging as he struggled to breathe. "I said get up," The man's tone didn't change. He almost sounded bored with what he was doing to the Doctor. He didn't even get a chance to move this time, as a fist connected with the side of his face, and his world went black.

When he opened his eyes again, his hands were bound above his head by his own shirt and something was wrapped around his ankles holding them closed. The man was sitting on his chest staring down at him. He still couldn't see the man's face, but he could feel the man's eyes watching him intently.

"Why?" He managed to rasp out.

"You betrayed Jack. He trusted you and you betrayed him." The man leaned down so close, he could feel his breath on his face. He shuddered slightly as he forced himself to continue looking at the man. "He wanted to kill you for hurting him. You left him alone and cold because you were bored with him."

"That's not..." He was rewarded for his effort by the man sitting up again quickly. He didn't have time to process what was happening before reciving another fist to his face. He managed not to pass out this time.

"I don't need to hear your lies," the man snapped. His voice changing for the first time. He cleared his throat and it went back to overly calm. "You betrayed him when I know that he loved you. I can hear it in his voice when he talks about you." A fist hit him again, this time another fist followed and then a third. The man leaned close to him again. "I wonder what he saw in this body. You're nothing special." The weight went away as the man stood up. He felt hands on his waist and his belt buckle being undone. He tried to turn away from the man and was kicked hard in the stomach. He gagged, this time getting sick from the blow.

The Doctor's eyes shot open as in the dream his trousers were being pulled down. He whimpered as he forced his mind to concentrate on something else. He knew it wasn't a dream and he didn't want to know what happened next. He tried to focus on anything that would stop the memories from surfacing. Fear filled him as he felt the bed shift. Turning his head slowly he saw that Jack was still laying on the bed behind him. Jack's eyes were closed and his breathing was even as he slept.

The man had said it was Jack's fault that he was being hurt. That he had betrayed Jack and the man was going to make him pay for it. He trusted Jack but had Jack known that the man was waiting for him. As the thought crossed his mind he felt the need to run. He couldn't run physically though, his body wasn't strong enough. Mentally though, he could picture the console room of the TARDIS. If he could just get there he would be safe from the memories and safe from the thought that Jack might have wanted him hurt so badly. He moved closer to the room as he struggled to turn over and look at Jack.

"Doctor," Jack asked opening his eyes a little. The Doctor froze in his movements. He had made it on to his back and he stared up at Jack with wide scared eyes. "Please don't look at me like that." The hurt in Jack's voice was clear, even as he inched closer to the door in his mind. Jack got out of the bed, coming around it so that he could kneel eye level to the Doctor. He could hear his own breathing, feel it as he breathed quicker.

"I don't know what you remembered but I promise you Doctor, no matter what he told you, I didn't send Ianto," Jack's voice was soft as he tried to calm the Doctor down. "I was here at Torchwood three when he called me to let me know that you were at Torchwood one. I dropped everything to rush there so that I could talk to you. If I had known what he planned I would have moved faster so that I could have stopped him. I often think back to that day and wonder if there was something I missed. Something that gave away what he was planning to do but no matter how hard I think about it, I still can't figure out why he hurt you."

The Doctor paused. He had one hand on the door. He had turned his head so that he could see Jack better and listen to him. He felt Jack take his hand in his. He thought about the short time he had been with Jack, that he was aware of. During that time Jack had never tried to hurt him, he had always been so gentle when cleaning him up or picking him up out of bed. The kisses that were given were nice and not forceful, but a gentle peck on his head as Jack showed his affection. His stomach was always full, though he may not like all of the food, he never had to worry about being hungry. Even when he woke up, he could tell that he had not been starved or denied tea as even though he felt weak and had a bladder infection, he wasn't dying. He patted the TARDIS door affectionately as he crept closer to the surface of his mind again.

"Please Doctor don't leave again. I will take you to Martha, if that is what you want and what it takes for you to get better, but don't hide away again," Jack begged him. He reached his hand up and touched the side of Jack's face. He tried to gently thumb off one of the tears that was rolling down Jack's cheek.

"Jack," He sighed softly. "M-m-m-my Jack," He managed to stutter out, causing Jack to smile. Jack lifted the hand he was holding, kissing the Doctor's knuckles. The Doctor smiled weakly back at Jack. Jack leaned his head down, resting it on his and the Doctor's hands.

"Always," Jack answered. Jack eventually lifted his head to look the Doctor in the eye once more. Though the Doctor seemed relaxed there was still a hint of fear in those brown eyes. Fear of what had happened to him and the possibility, how ever small it was, that Jack was involved. Jack released the Doctor's hand, leaning up to kiss him softly on the cheek. The Doctor's face was flushed and felt warmer then normal. He was also sweaty due to tossing and turning from his nightmare.

"I am going to go and draw you a nice warm bath," Jack informed him softly as he leaned back. He left the Doctor laying on the bed as he hurried to get the bath ready. As the water filled the tub though, he leaned against the counter and waited. He had come close to losing the Doctor again tonight from the memories that plagued him in his sleep. He tried to avoid talking to the Doctor out of fear that he would scare the Doctor away, but he realized avoiding the conversation was worse. He was going to have to talk to him, as hard as the conversation was going to be. Taking a deep breath, he turned off the water before returning to the Doctor.

The Doctor lay on the bed in the same position that he had been left. Jack undressed him and then picked him up to carry him back to the tub. The Doctor was watching him as he carried him through, placing him in the warm water. Jack didn't say anything as he thought about what he was going to tell the Doctor. Instead he focused on taking care of the Doctor for what he hoped wasn't the last time. Lathering up a cloth, he started with the Doctor's face and began gently clean the Doctor's body. He then grabbed the shampoo. Carefully, so as not to get water in his eyes, he wet the Doctor's hair. The Doctor sighed in content as Jack massaged his scalp with his fingers as he worked the shampoo into his hair. After rinsing his hair out, he got the Time Lord out of the bath, carrying him back to his room. He dressed the Doctor in a clean pair of pajamas and brushed his hair out.

"Jack?" The Doctor questioned as he was lifted off of his bed once more then placed in his chair. Jack pulled up the chair he normally sat in, so that he faced the Doctor.

"You keep asking me why and I have been avoiding your question because truthfully I don't know why," Jack admitted, deciding it was the best place to start. The Doctor nodded, showing that he was listening as he waited for Jack to continue. "The man who attacked you is name Ianto Jones and he was my lover. I had been with Ianto for about a year when he found out I was immortal. It was an accident of course. We were both working for Torchwood and had gone out into the field together. We were attacked by a weevil. I died to save him. When I woke up again he demanded answers, so I told him about traveling with you."

"I forgave you long ago for leaving me on the Game Station but for the longest time I did want to kill you for leaving me." The Doctor tensed up, his eyes going wide. Jack didn't reach out to him as he knew his words would upset the Time Lord but he had to say them. "I didn't understand back then why you had left. Honestly I still don't understand but being over one hundred years old has given me a lot of time to think. I came to realize that I was so mad at you because I did love you Doctor, I still do. So I eventually decided if I ever met up with you again, I just wanted answers on why you had left me. I still expect those answers when you can speak clearly again," Jack informed him.

"K," The Doctor whispered, his voice so soft that Jack barely heard him.

"I told the same story to Ianto one night. He told me that he would help me to get my answers. That you had shown up at Torchwood before and he was sure you would make your way back if we waited. I was here when you went to Torchwood one. Ianto called me and told me you were there. I rushed as quickly as I could but by the time I got to London it was over. I assumed I had missed you again, so instead I went around helping people until I stumbled across you by accident." Jack hung his head slightly as he remembered walking in on the Doctor laying on the ground. He wasn't going to tell the Doctor how he looked and how Jack thought he might be dead. No that was his own horror to remember.

"I took you to the TARDIS and vowed that I would take care of you until you were back on your feet again. That was two years ago last month." Jack lifted his head up again to see the understanding in the Doctor's eyes. It finally made sense to the Doctor why everyone seemed to know him. It explained why Sarah Jane and Jack had time to become friends and Sarah Jane was able to adopt a child. Two years would give Martha plenty of time to study his muscles and adapt her stretches to his unique physique. He wondered how many cups of tea he had sat in with his friends, not realizing that they were across from him.

"Are you still with me Doc?" Jack asked after a moment. He reached out gently stroking the Doctor's hair back behind his ear. The Doctor had been quiet for so long that Jack was starting to get worried.

"Yes," the Doctor answered him immediately. He had a lot to think about but he didn't feel the need to run at the moment. No what he needed was a hot cup of tea. "Tea?"

"Of course," Jack smiled. Standing up he pushed the Doctor into the hub. As he did, the Dejinshen darted across the hub, back to its hiding place. The Doctor put a hand on the wheel, trying to turn the chair towards where the cat had disappeared. "What are you doing?" Jack asked in confusion. The Doctor pointed to where a pair of eyes was watching them from underneath the computers. Jack wheeled the chair over and put the breaks on. "I will be right back."

"K," The Doctor answered as he tried to see the Dejinshen. He could feel the loneliness radiating from it as it called for its lost family group. He knew the feeling of being all alone and emphasized with the creature. Reaching his hand out to it, he opened his mind enough for the cat to be able to feel him. Slowly the creature slinked out of underneath the computers. The Doctor let the feeling of safety radiate from him towards it as he left his hand extended. The cat came forward and jumped up into his lap, sadness radiating from it. He placed his hand on the creature's back.

The Dejinshen had the intelligence of a small child. Though they may not be able to talk in words they understood simple thoughts. He placed his hand against the side of the cats head. Closing his eyes, he could see the Dejinshen wandering the earth woods, looking desperately for its family. It had been part of a small pack and it didn't know how to survive properly on its own. Only three moons had passed though since it came to this strange place, certainly not long enough to be the creature Jack had tracked in the past.

"I think it likes you," Jack told the Doctor as he came over with his cup of tea. The cat started to move, but the Doctor continued to let it know it was safe. Leaving his hand on the cat's back, he lifted his other hand to point at the keyboard. Jack moved it closer and carefully the Doctor type out the word home. "You want to take it home?" Jack looked at him like he was crazy. He couldn't walk or take care of himself yet, let alone fly the TARDIS.

"Yes," The Doctor answered. He was sure the TARDIS would know where the Dejinshen's home planet was and he had yet to see her since he woke up. He decided it was time to change that, regardless of the look Jack was giving him.


	11. Chapter 11

Jack had never been much of a cat person. He had one growing up but he had always wanted a dog instead. The Dejinshen just reaffirmed Jack's dislike of cats over the next three days. In reality it wasn't the cat's fault but Jack still blamed it rather then the Time Lord who was bound and determined to save the creature. It took him three days to break Jack down but in the end the Doctor got what he wanted, Jack was going to let him take the cat home.

The first day hadn't really been that bad. The Dejinshen was frightened and alone. It spent the day on the Doctor's lap mewing pitifully and then Doctor cooed at it softly. Though he couldn't talk, he found out quickly that he could still hum and spent the day humming Gallifreyan nursery songs to the cat as he tried to coax it to eat. He still ate himself and interacted with Jack like normal so Jack wasn't too worried. He had Owen examine the Doctor for any signs of infection or illness. Much to his relief the Doctor was given a clean bill of health and warned that he shouldn't eat two packages of Jammie Dodgers by himself again. The Doctor found humor in that and was in a good mood most of the day. They made a bed for the Dejinshen of a blanket near the vortex manipulator where it would be warm. The Doctor allowed Jack to take him to bed and he even hummed to himself as Jack laid him down the first night.

The second day though changed that. The cat didn't respond as it laid limp on the Doctor's lap. It didn't mew, didn't eat, didn't do anything but lay there breathing. The Doctor still allowed Jack to feed him, but he stopped answering Jack. He did nothing but stare at Jack with anger in his eyes as he tended to the cat. Jack tried to help him to coax the creature into eating but as he laid the Doctor down on the second day, he knew there was nothing that could be done for it. He also knew that if the cat died, it was going to destroy the Doctor and he had to come up with a plan to help it. The third day is when Jack realized that he had no other choice then to allow the Doctor to try to take it home. It all started first thing in the morning as Jack went into the Doctor's room to get him out of bed.

"No Jack," He growled angrily as Jack tried to get him out of bed that morning. Jack didn't listen to him, but he didn't push it as he placed the Doctor in his chair. The rest of the morning was filled with the Doctor trying to do things by himself and if he couldn't, then he didn't want Jack's help. He closed his mouth tightly against Jack trying to feed him oatmeal, keeping his head turned away from the spoon. Jack gave up after awhile and instead made him toast, which the Doctor still refused to eat. The final straw for Jack is when the Doctor tried to get out of his wheelchair on his own to get the cat up off the blanket on the floor. The Doctor ended up on the floor, but refused to let Jack help him off of it. Instead he laid there with his head on the blanket, gently stroking the cat's fur. Jack watched him for awhile before giving in.

"Enough of this," Jack snapped angrily. He stood up and went over to the Doctor scooping him up in his arms. The Doctor was surprised how gentle Jack was even with how angry he seemed.

"No ape," The Doctor spat, glaring at Jack with all the anger of the oncoming storm. He squirmed in Jack's arms, trying to get back to the Dejinshen.

"Relax before I drop you. I am taking you to the TARDIS," Jack informed him. The Doctor stopped squirming, but continued to glare at Jack as he bent down and picked up the cat. He had the Doctor hold it as he carried them both down the stairs of the hub. They went past the cells to the end of a long hall with a thick metal door. Through the door was Jack's vault and where he was keeping the TARDIS safe until the Doctor was able to fly her again. Opening the panel on the door, he put in the security code and then put his key into the lock. The door opened and he stepped inside.

"Jack," The Doctor whimpered, sounding afraid. He trusted Jack but he had also made Jack angry and he wasn't sure what the Captain was capable of when he was mad.

"Shh, I had to make sure she stayed safe," Jack reassured him. He carried him to a second door and put in the pass code for it. Opening the door, revealed the blue box sitting alone in the small room. The Doctor smiled as he was taken over to her. Jack handed him his key and helped the Doctor to place it into the lock and open the door. As the three of them entered the TARDIS hummed her happiness at her thief's return. She had only occasional visits from Jack the last two years, otherwise she had sat hidden away on standby power waiting for her thief to heal. As they approached the console she ran a scan on him, blowing Jack with warm air as a thank you for taking care of him. The Doctor may have been weak still but he was healthy and healing.

"You are going to have to direct me on what buttons to press," Jack informed the Doctor. He sat him down on the captain's chair a moment, then took the Dejinshen out of his arms and laid it on the chair. Hauling the Doctor up, he held him so that he was standing with Jack's help, facing the console. The Doctor giggled as he pointed and was moved around the console so that he could take the TARDIS off of standby power. He set the TARDIS to random as he opened his mind up to her and let her know they needed to take the cat home. He felt her wash over him in a way to him that was familiar as breathing and he relished in it.

Pulling the hand break, the TARDIS took off for the first time in over two years. She was gentle as her thief was still injured and she didn't throw them to the ground or give him to much trouble as Jack and him danced around the controls trying to keep her steady. Jack had helped him before with this part and he only made a couple of mistakes in direction, but otherwise he was quick at getting the Doctor to the next part of the console in time to press the button, pull the lever or turn the knob that he needed to. Soon the TARDIS was landing and she thumped on the ground shaking them slightly. Picking up the cat again, they made their way to the door and looked out.

The forest stretched out in front of them as far as Jack could see. The place almost looked like a rain forest on the planet earth but the trees were a light brown color with almost a golden hue on the bark. The leaves though were dark green and fanned out under the blue sky. From the leaves Jack could see eyes watching them, not approaching but staring at the intruders. The Doctor could see as well as feel the other Dejinshen. He opened his mind enough that they would know that he meant no harm as he nodded for Jack to go forward. Carefully he laid the small cat in his arms, on a mossy bed and then they backed away.

Once inside the TARDIS door again, one of the others slunk out of the bushes. Jack's eyes opened wider as the cat was larger then a tiger and pure black. It nuzzled the smaller cat gently with it's nose and the little one mewed pitifully. Another cat came out of the bushes, this one smaller then the male who first approached. It leaned down nuzzling the smaller one with its head. The Doctor could feel the little one's joy at being reunited with its family. He smiled as gently the female picked the smaller cat up with it's mouth and the group disappeared again into the trees. There was nothing more they could do now, but hope that the cat lived now that it was reunited with its family.

"I'm sorry I didn't listen to you sooner," Jack apologized. He rested his chin on the Doctor's shoulder as the two of them stood in the looking out at the unfamiliar planet.

"Jack," The Doctor sighed. Jack closed the door and took the Doctor back to the console. The Doctor hit a button that would reverse the trip and the ride home went just as smoothly. Yet as they stepped off the TARDIS again, Jack saw that she was no longer down in the vault, but nestled in the corner of the Doctor's bedroom. The Doctor smiled at him playfully as Jack shook his head. He wasn't going to make the Doctor move her, he just hoped that the Doctor wasn't going to try any midnight escapes with the TARDIS being so close.

"Now that the cat is home, how about I get you something to eat. I know you have to be hungry since you have refused food all morning," Jack told him as he carried him back out to where the Doctor's wheelchair was sitting.

"K," The Doctor answered.

"Is there anything in particular you want to eat?" Jack wondered. He was thinking of ordering pizza because it had been awhile since he had it.

"No," The Doctor answered. Jack sat him down in his chair. As he started to stand the Doctor reached up and placed his hand gently on the side of Jack's face. Jack took the Doctor's hand in his and kissed him gently on the wrist. The Doctor didn't pull away or make a face at the gesture, instead he just held his arm still for Jack. Jack kissed his wrist again and then released the Doctor's hand.

"I am going to order pizza, I will be back in a moment," Jack informed him. Not able to contain his happiness, he hurried to find his phone. He order a large pizza with everything on it and then not sure if the Doctor would like that he also ordered just a pepperoni pizza. Before hanging up with the restaurant he walked out into the hub again where the Doctor was waiting for him. "Do you like pizza with everything on it?"

"Yes," The Doctor answered. Pizza sounded good as he was afraid Jack was making him oatmeal again. He was really going to have to find out a way to let Jack know that he was sick of oatmeal. Jack finished placing the order and then hung up the phone. They had a little bit of a wait before the pizza arrived and Jack used that time to help the Doctor stretch his muscles out so that he could get back on his feet properly. When the pizza arrived, Jack placed the box where the Doctor could reach it and together they sat and finished off almost all of the two large pizzas, the Doctor needing little help to feed himself the slices. For just a moment Jack could pretend that there was nothing wrong with the Doctor. The Doctor though was making a lot of progress in a short time and Jack hoped that soon he wouldn't have to pretend anymore.

Jack just sat watching the Doctor sleep, curled up on his side around a pillow. His breathing was even as his dreamed peacefully, not plagued by the nightmares that had haunted him a few days before. He really didn't need to be watched as he was able to call out to Jack and let him know when he was awake, but Jack didn't want to leave him quite yet. He couldn't when his mind was reeling with the fact that the Doctor was freely accepting him kissing him on the head and holding his wrist still as Jack kissed the inside of it.

He told himself that he could be platonic to the Doctor. That he could take care of him as a doctor, patient relationship even after the Doctor had woken up from his coma. He was kidding himself though as he knew that he still loved the Doctor and any sign that the Doctor was returning his love was enough to give Jack hope. He had to be careful though, he wasn't sure if the Doctor was even ready for a relationship. If he pushed the Doctor to hard, to fast there would be nothing stopping the Doctor from getting on the TARDIS and leaving him forever. If that happened Jack knew he would have no one to blame but himself. Still he had gone two years without sex, he was sure that he could go another ten years if he had to. He really didn't want to but for the Doctor's sake he would.

"No," The Doctor groaned turning into his pillow more. He smacked his lips and went back into a deeper sleep again without fully waking. Jack took the opportunity to sneak out of the room. The next morning the Doctor refused to eat again. Jack tried to spoon the oatmeal into his mouth but the Doctor kept his head turned away with his lips sucked in. Jack worried that the Doctor was still refusing to eat, but he had eaten the pizza last night just fine. Jack put the spoon down in the bowl.

"Don't want oatmeal?" Jack wondered.

"No," The Doctor sighed in relief as Jack caught on. Jack stood and poured the bowl into the trash bin. He then proceeded to make the Doctor toast with marmalade. He cut the bread into bite sized pieces that the Doctor would be able to eat by himself. Setting it down in front of him, the Time Lord reached out and started to eat hungrily.

"Do you just not want me to help you eat anymore?" Jack questioned as he began to try to think of meals the Doctor would be able to eat with little or no assistance. The Doctor looked at him like he was crazy though.

"Ape," The Doctor mumbled as he picked up another piece of bread. He shoved it happily in his mouth, licking the gooey marmalade off of his fingers. He picked up another piece and licked the marmalade off of the toast. Holding it out to Jack, he stuck out his lower lip pouting.

"You just licked the marmalade off," Jack informed him. The Doctor nodded the sad look not leaving his face. Sighing Jack stood and got him the jar of marmalade. The Doctor immediately smiled as Jack opened the jar putting it in his reach. The Doctor dug two of his fingers into the jar, covering them in the sticky substance before bringing them to his mouth.

"He is going to get a sugar high," Gwen commented as she came in to find the Doctor almost half way done with the jar.

"Probably," Jack agreed.

"I thought you should know Martha just pulled into the hub," Gwen informed Jack, remembering her original reason for going into the kitchen.

"We better get you cleaned up and down to the exam room," Jack stated. The Doctor pulled a face. "Don't give me that look. Martha has helped keep you healthy and alive these last two years. She takes time out of her busy day twice a week to come down here and make sure that you are still healthy. So give me the jar of marmalade for now and for lunch I will put the rest in a bowl so you can eat it easier." The Doctor nodded. He still wasn't happy but accepted he wasn't going to get out of the exam. Reluctantly he gave up his jar of marmalade to Jack. Jack took him down to the exam room, lifting him on the bed.

"Hello Doctor," Martha said cheerfully as she set to work checking his vitals. "How are you feeling today?"

"Go-Go-Go-ood," The Doctor managed to get out with a smile.

"Good, because I want to run you through your stretches today and then we are going to see if you can hold yourself up while Jack supports you. I saw the way you were hanging off of Jack at UNIT and I am happy to see you can hold your weight partially with your arms. But in order to walk again you have to support yourself with your legs as well," Martha informed him as she started on his stretches. He was nervous by the time she was finished but he trusted Jack not to let him just fall. Jack pulled him up so that he was holding him again.

"I've got you," Jack whispered to the Doctor as the Doctor seemed reluctant to try and put his feet down. Jack felt the Doctor take his own weight for just a moment before he lost it. He slipped and Jack wrapped his arms around the Time Lord's waist tightly to keep him from falling.

"No," The Doctor screamed starting to squirm in Jack's arms. Martha stepped forward to try to help Jack.

"Get back, he is starting to panic and he can get violent," Jack warned her. He lifted the Doctor up on to the bed, loosely supporting him. "You're all right nothing is going to hurt you."

"Jack," The Doctor cried out, the panic clear in his voice. He swung his fist at Jack, even as Jack rubbed his shoulder.

"I am right her, you just need to calm down so you can see me clearly," Jack cooed softly.

"How long does he normally stay like this?" Martha asked as she observed, staying clear of the Doctor's fist. Jack though was prepared for the Doctor to swing at him again and caught his hand with ease.

"Only a few minutes until he calms down and realizes he isn't being restrained and nothing is going to hurt him," Jack told her though he directed his answer more at the Doctor. It took several more minutes before the Doctor calmed down enough that he latched on to Jack. He held on to Jack's shirt tightly in both hands as Jack wrapped him in a hug. "There now that's better."

"Jack," The Doctor moaned, hiding his face in Jack's shirt. He didn't know what just happened, he just knew the rush of adrenaline in his system was now making him feel poorly.

"You did well Doctor. You managed to take your own weight for a moment while Jack held you up. We will continue with your stretches and the next time you should be able to hold yourself up for longer," Martha told him trying to look on the bright side.

"You hear that you will be walking soon and then before you know it, running." Jack smiled. The Doctor though just continued to hold on to Jack. They may have had high hopes that he would be running again soon, but at the moment he didn't feel that way. He felt as though he was useless with a body and mouth that didn't want to work. He also didn't deserve Jack, but he wasn't going to let the comfort Jack gave him go. As annoyed as he got with Jack sometimes, he also felt as Jack was the only thing keeping him from hiding within the TARDIS. He just had to trust Jack to keep him anchored.

-DW-

The Doctor held on to Jack as tightly as he could for as long as he could. Eventually though, Martha had to go and so Jack carefully pried the Doctor's hands loose from his shirt. To Jack's credit rather then putting the Doctor into his wheelchair, he took him through to his room, laying him down carefully on his bed. He then got up on the bed beside him, pulling him close so that the Doctor could cuddle up with him as long as he needed to. Jack's hand was rubbing his back soothingly and he concentrated on how it felt.

The Doctor hated his body. He wanted to go to sleep and wake up with it working again, just like he had suddenly woke up into his useless body that he didn't understand. He stuttered when he said anything more then a few words and he couldn't stand on his own without having a panic attack. He had always know that he was a bad Time Lord but his body went and proved it without his permission. If the others could see him now they would know for sure that he was the disgrace that they had always thought he was. He wrapped his arms around Jack holding on to him tightly. He was thankful Jack had never met the other Time Lords or Jack wouldn't be so willing to comfort him. Jack would turn his back just like the rest of them did. He didn't want that though. He needed Jack to be there for him.

"Jack st-st-st-st," He tried to say getting frustrated when he couldn't get the word out. Jack stopped rubbing his back, thinking he was trying to tell him to stop. The Doctor though growled in frustration at the lost contact. "Jack," He moaned, rubbing Jack's back the best he could with his own hand. Jack thankfully got the message and began to rub his back again.

"What do you need then Doctor?" Jack questioned. He was slightly confused but he didn't know how to help the Doctor to talk clearer.

"St-st-st-st," The Doctor stuttered again.

"I know it is frustrating Doctor but you can't give up. You just need to try again," Jack informed the Doctor not quite sure what he wanted to say. The Doctor though was done trying. He buried his face in Jack's chest, breathing in Jack's unique comforting scent. It didn't matter how many years had passed for Jack, he still smelled the same as when he had first set foot on the TARDIS all those years ago. He had been a different person back then but he would always remember Jack's scent. It was a strange mixture of fifty-first century hormones, soap and Jack's own body chemistry. He closed his eyes, just enjoying Jack's warmth.

"No," He whined when Jack started to move him after a little while. He opened his eyes to look up at Jack sadly.

"Sorry Doctor, I thought you were asleep," Jack admitted as he settled back down into the bed again. The Doctor adjust himself so that he was more comfortable. He should have been thinking about Jack's comfort as well but at the moment that didn't matter to him. All that mattered is that Jack didn't leave him like everyone else.

"Jack st-st-st-st," He tried again.

"Stay?" Jack questioned finally realizing what the Doctor had been trying to tell him for a while now.

"Yes," The Doctor breathed a sigh of relief that Jack caught on.

"Oh sweetheart I am not going anywhere," Jack informed him cuddling him a little closer. If that was even possible. The Doctor didn't even mind that Jack called him sweetheart as he laid holding Jack. "I am not going to leave you until you are ready for me to and if that day never comes then I will always be by your side."

"K" The Doctor replied. He wished he could say more and tell Jack how much he appreciated him, but with his limited vocabulary he was forced to the single words that didn't express how he truly felt.

"Now I know you are comfortable but there is a jar of marmalade in the kitchen for you and a banana. I could also cook you a nice plate of chips if you are hungry," Jack offered. He was hungry himself but he wasn't going to make the Doctor get out of bed if he wasn't ready to.

"Yes." The Doctor agreed with a smile.

"Yes," Jack clarified as the Doctor's voice was a little muffled against his shirt. The Doctor nodded. Getting out of the bed, Jack scooped him up and carried him through to his wheelchair. Sitting him in it, he took him up to the kitchen and set the oven to preheat while he emptied a brand new jar of marmalade into a bowl. He was sure he was going to regret it later, but the smile on the Doctor's face as he dipped his fingers in was worth it. By the time the chips had baked, the Doctor had eaten majority of the marmalade, two bananas and drank an entire cup of tea. Jack didn't think he would be hungry for the chips anymore and he was right as the Doctor only at a couple. Jack though ate the rest of them. He needed a lot of calories to keep his atron energy fueled body going and didn't eat as much as he should in order to care for the Doctor instead.

"Jack be-be-bed," The Doctor yawned after he finished his meal. Jack wasn't surprised at the request as it seemed to becoming the Doctor's afternoon routine to eat and then sleep.

"All right. Let me put you to bed and then I will do the dishes," Jack informed him.

"No, Jack st-st-st," The Doctor argued.

"Of course I will," Jack agreed. He took the Doctor to bed once more, settling down beneath the blanket. The Doctor laid on his chest, his legs between Jacks and their groins touching. Jack was surprised when it didn't turn him on, as he settled down to be the Doctor's pillow as he slept. He wasn't sure what it meant except for the fact that he knew he loved the Doctor enough that he could hold him without thoughts of sex when necessary. Kissing the sleepy Doctor on top of the head, he closed his own eyes to rest for awhile.


	12. Chapter 12

There were many things that the Doctor regretted in his long life. The list included people he couldn't save like his companion Adric that lost his life trying to stop a ship from crashing into the Earth. He regretted not being able to be there for his sons as they grew up on Gallifrey. Though he was around still at the time, since he wasn't a good Time Lord he was seen as an unfit parent and disgraced his family by divorcing his wife. His mother, youngest son and granddaughter eventually forgave him but he didn't see any of them as often as he would have liked. He regretted leaving his companions behind over the years but he tried not to think about what became of their lives after he stopped traveling with them. Dwelling on the past made it hard for him to get out of bed in the mornings and so he had to keep thinking of his future.

Looking up into Jack's sleeping face though, he actually found himself regretting the fact that he had left him behind on the Game Station. It hadn't been Jack's fault that Rose had turned him immortal but he had ran still as the time lines bounced off of Jack. He could use the excuse that he was about to regenerate as he ran but he was clear headed about the fact he was leaving Jack behind. Jack should have hated him for leaving him, yet here he was laying safe and sound on Jack's chest after being cared for him for two years. Two years that he was helpless and could have been starved to death or mistreated, instead Jack took care of him in a way that he didn't deserve.

When he had first woke up, he had been confused. Things didn't make sense and he couldn't wrap his head around the fact that he was within Torchwood when he had just been with Rose. Now though his mind was clearer but his body was still useless. He wondered if it would just be easier to regenerate then to continue trying to get this body to work. He didn't like regeneration as it felt as though he was dying and he had only been in this body for three years and it still had thousands of years left if he treated it right. Still regeneration would get him back into a body that worked with a mouth that could tell Jack everything that he needed to say. The problem was in order to regenerate he needed to be seriously wounded unless he was forced to regenerate by an outside factor and he could say for sure that he wasn't hurt, just weak.

He laid his head back on Jack's chest, listening to Jack's heartbeat. He wondered if Jack would forgive him for forcing himself to regenerate. His useless mouth couldn't tell Jack his reasoning now, but once he was in his new body he could explain it to Jack. Explain to him that he wouldn't have panic attacks anymore when he felt restricted and that Jack wouldn't have to take care of him anymore. He would be able to take Jack to new planets and the two of them could run along sandy white beaches or across green apple grass. He lifted his head and looked around the room. There was nothing within reach that would allow him to cause himself to regenerate. Frustrated he laid his head down again.

"Can't sleep?" Jack's sleepily voice spoke up. He had been sleeping comfortably until the Doctor had headbutted him in the ribs. He looked down into the frustrated face of the Doctor. Tears filled his eyes but he wasn't sad. The tears came from anger at his situation.

"No," The Doctor growled. He tried to push himself up, but he only managed to get up a little. "Jack tea?" He questioned.

"Of course," Jack kissed him on the head before easing himself from underneath the Doctor. He started to pick the Doctor up to take him to the kitchen but the Doctor put his hand up to stop him. As he did, the Doctor reached into Jack's pocket, taking his key and a piece of paper.

"No, me st-st-st," He stuttered as he looked Jack in the eye. Jack noticed him taking the paper and took it back, depositing back in his pocket, but he didn't notice the Doctor still had the key. Realizing that the Doctor wanted a moment alone, Jack moved him further up on the bed, so that he was resting on the pillow. He hoped silently that he hadn't given the Doctor a bad dream by resting with him again.

"I will be right back with your tea," Jack informed him. He left the room to make the Doctor's tea and as soon as he was gone, the Doctor began to rock. Pushing his body up with his hands, he twisted and rolled. He hit the edge of the bed and pushed a little harder to send himself to the floor with a clunk. His body jolted and he bit back the cry of pain that went threw him. Without waiting to see if Jack heard, he began to turn his body to make his way towards the TARDIS. She was in the corner of his room, so he didn't have to go far, but it felt as though he had to work hard for every inch that he made towards her. He made it to her door and then sat up. That part at least was easy. He pulled Jack's key out of his pocket. Reaching up as high as he could he managed to get the key into the lock and push the door open.

The TARDIS blasted him with cold air as she hummed at him. She could tell he wasn't there just to visit her and she tried to deter him from entering. He didn't listen though as he pushed his way inside, closing the door behind him with his feet. He was going to have to make it up the ramp to get what he needed. It seemed like a daunting task, but he was determined to make it. He clawed his way up the ramp, digging his fingers into the grating to pull himself towards the console. He caught one of his fingers bending it. He cried out in pain but he didn't stop. His shirt rode up and he scrapped his stomach and chest on the floor, but he was determined to make it.

"Doctor are you in there?" Jack called out trying the door. He didn't answer him as he pulled himself closer to the console. He was almost there. He heard Jack swear as he realized that his key was gone. "Doctor please let me on." Sitting up he reached under the console to find the tools that he used to frequently work on the TARDIS with. He pulled out a small knife that he used to strip the wire when making repairs. He tested it with the tip of his finger, finding that it was sharp enough for what he wanted to do. The TARDIS hummed loudly at him and he mentally projected for her to stop. She could be angry with him but it wasn't going to change his mind. His hand was shaking as he pushed the knife against his wrist. He gritted his teeth in pain but he didn't stop. The pain would only be for a moment once he regenerated he would be healed. He looked up as he heard a key in the lock and the door opened.

"What are you doing?" Jack cried out, rushing over to him. He grabbed the knife out of the Doctor's hand and flung it as far away from him as he could. The knife bounced off the TARDIS wall. Jack reached into his pocket, pulling out a handkerchief. He applied pressure to the Doctor's wrist as he looked him in the eyes. The Doctor looked down though ashamed of what he had done. He didn't fight as Jack lifted him up, carrying him into the medi-bay. He was laid gently down on one of the beds and Jack moved to get a syringe and a suture kit so that he could close the wound the Doctor caused.

Jack felt numb and angry that the Doctor was trying to commit suicide after everything he had did to keep him alive the last two years. He wanted to yell at the Doctor but he couldn't find the words to. Instead he numbed the Doctor's wrist and then stitched it. He then wrapped a clean bandage around the wound. The entire time the Doctor refused to look at him, keeping his eyes closed and his head down. Jack tried to separate himself from the feelings he had for the Doctor as he cleaned the scrapes on his chest and then put a finger splint on his left ring finger. The TARDIS showed that it had been sprained. He was lucky as he hadn't tore the ligament but he would be sore for a few days. Once he was sure the Doctor was cleaned up and had no other sharp objects on him, he picked him up and carried him out to his wheelchair.

"I am calling UNIT in the morning and seeing if Martha will take over your care," Jack informed the Doctor as he sat down in front of him.

"No." The Doctor couldn't help his surprised cry.

"I have obviously failed you since you think taking your own life is the correct course of action. I would ask you what the hell you were thinking but I don't think you were and the fact that you tricked me to get me out of your room so that you could kill yourself is what upsets me the most. So since you don't feel you can trust me and I obviously can't trust you, UNIT is going to be the best place for you until you are healed." Reaching out, he grabbed the buckle and began to fasten it around the Doctor's waist.

"No, no, no," The Doctor cried out fighting him.

"I am sorry Doctor, but you can't be trusted." He clasped the buckle as the Doctor went into a full on panic attack. He clawed at the buckle with both hands, ignoring his sprained finger as he screamed. Jack didn't try to calm him as he stood up and moved away from the Doctor, needing to be alone for a moment.

"Jack," The Doctor called out as he started to hyperventilate. Jack didn't stop though. He moved until he was just out of sight of the Doctor before he slid down the wall finally letting the tears free that had been building since he walked onto the TARDIS. His life for the last two years had revolved around keeping the Doctor alive, but he had failed him. Maybe he should have taken him to UNIT to begin with, then maybe he wouldn't feel like such a failure.


	13. Chapter 13

Jack stayed away from the Doctor until he had calmed himself down. He was still upset over the situation that the Doctor had put him in, but he felt better able to deal with it. Standing up again, he headed to the bathroom and cleaned his face up before heading back to the Doctor. The Doctor was sitting in his chair whimpering as he clawed pitifully at the buckle. His body was covered in sweat, tears stained his cheeks and his eyes were slightly glazed as he fought against his panic. Feeling horrible for leaving the Doctor in such a state, regardless of how angry he had been, he carefully unbuckled the Time Lord before pulling him into his lap.

"Shhh, I am sorry," Jack cooed as he rocked the Doctor. The Doctor clung to him still whimpering softly. As mad as he had been at the Doctor he would never forgive himself if he caused the Time Lord to retreat into his mind again. He didn't deserve that. The splint around the Doctor's finger had moved. He cried out as Jack moved it back into place. "Shh, you're all right."

"Jack," The Doctor whimpered. The Doctor gagged and Jack moved him just in time as he was sick on the floor of the hub. He groaned, letting his head rest against Jack's chest again. He felt as though he had been running for hours and his throat was sore. He just wanted to go to bed and sleep. Jack placed him in his wheelchair again, thankfully not buckling him in, so that he could clean up the mess.

"Bed," He asked Jack softly.

"Not yet," Jack answered back as he finished cleaning. Once the sick had been cleaned up, Jack pushed the chair over to the computer. He was willing to let the Doctor rest, but only after he had his answers. He pulled the keyboard into reach, holding it so the Doctor could type.

"Tell me why you tried to kill yourself," Jack whispered softly. The Doctor groaned as he pecked at the keys. Jack watched as the word regenerate appeared on the screen. "You wanted to regenerate?"

"Yes," The Doctor answered.

"Regenerating is not the answer. I don't know how hard this is for you, I can't even begin to imagine what you are feeling, but giving up is not the answer. You will be able to walk and talk in this body again. I am not saying it is going to be easy, but I will help you to get back on your feet if you will let me," Jack informed him. The Doctor hit keys on the keyboard again and the word UNIT appeared. He looked at Jack questioningly. "I was angry with you. I am still am but I am not going to send you away unless you want to go."

"No," The Doctor informed him shaking his head to emphasize the point. He reached out his hand to Jack. "My Jack."

"And I will always be your Jack, unless you try something as stupid as forcing yourself to regenerate again. Then I won't hesitate to take you to UNIT no matter how much it will break my heart to lose you but at least I know you will be safe with round the clock supervision." Jack kissed the Doctor on the top of his head. "Now promise me that you won't try to regenerate again."

The Doctor sighed but typed out the word promise on the keyboard. He yawned loudly, trying to make his point that he just wanted to go to bed. He hoped Jack would lay him down in his own room beneath his blanket. He was to tired to even think of making it to the TARDIS at the moment, but her singing would help him to relax and drift off to sleep. Jack picked him up out of the wheelchair and carried him through to his room laying him down on top of the blankets. He disappeared for a moment, returning with a wet cloth.

"Before you even think of disappearing into the TARDIS again, I have hidden both of the keys until I think it is safe for you to enter again," Jack told him.

"K," The Doctor groaned. He wasn't happy with it, but he deserved worse. Jack carefully stripped him of his clothes, throwing them into the hamper He then picked up the wet cloth, wiping the Doctor down to clean him up a little. He was then changed into a clean pair of trousers and tucked beneath the blankets. Jack was afraid to leave his side, so rather then leaving the Doctor to sleep he settled down in the chair beside his bed. The Doctor rolled up on his side, reaching out to take Jack's hand in his own. Jack gripped his hand tightly back as the Doctor drifted off to sleep. Once he was positive the Doctor was asleep he stood and headed to the TARDIS. Unlocking the door he let himself on.

"Sorry old girl," Jack apologized as she hummed sadly at him. He ran a hand comfortingly on her coral as he retrieved the knife he had thrown in anger. The Doctor's blood still covered it and he fought being sick as he held it. He went to the console next, looking around it for anything the Doctor could hurt himself with. He took the tools from underneath the console, placing them on the Captain's seat. "Did I get them all?" He asked the TARDIS and she blew warm air on him. He smiled.

"I am going to place you on standby power again for awhile until he is healthier. I am sorry but I can't risk him coming in here again while I can't get to him. We could have lost him today and I know neither one of us can bare that," Jack said. He rubbed the console as she hummed at him. Going around her, he set her to stand by power. Picking up the tools off the seat, he took them into the kitchen on the TARDIS, hiding them on her highest shelf until the Doctor could be trusted again. The knife though he rinsed off in the sink and then pocketed it. He was going to lock it up in his office along with the TARDIS keys for now. Leaving the TARDIS he locked it behind him.

Jack checked once more that the Doctor was still asleep. The Doctor was snoring softly, wrapped tightly around his pillow. His face was lax and he was drooling slightly. Knowing the Doctor would be horrified to find he was drooling if he was awake, Jack quickly left the room. He locked the keys and knife in the safe in his office and grabbed his laptop. Heading back to the Doctor's room, he sat down and began to research ways to help the Doctor to walk again. He was going to get the Doctor back on his feet even if he had to fight him for every step.

-DW-

After almost ten hours the Doctor still didn't show signs that he was waking up. Jack didn't know if he should wake the Doctor to eat, or let him sleep until he was ready to wake. He just knew he was worried about the Time Lord not only because he had tried to take his life but also because he had panic attacks for almost a half an hour straight from being strapped into his wheelchair. Jack had set by his side almost the entire time, only leaving him long enough to eat and check on the rift. He was tired of sitting there though so making a decision he reached out and brushed the hair gently back from the Doctor's face.

The Doctor groaned slightly, rubbing his face against his pillow as he smacked his lips. Jack smiled as he watched him. He had almost lost the Doctor yesterday and the thought that he could try again was still at the forefront of Jack's mind. He was afraid to leave the Doctor unattended for even a moment but he couldn't stay by his side constantly. He needed someone to talk to, someone that would understand. Jack looked at the time, it was almost five in the morning, but he picked up his phone and called Martha.

"Jack," Martha asked sound sleepy. "What is wrong?" Jack took a deep breath, getting himself ready for the difficult conversation.

"I am worried about the Doctor," He began. He told her about the events that happened the day before, listening to her gasp at the suicide attempt. He knew she would be angry at him for causing the Doctor to go into numerous panic attacks on purpose but he had to tell her in order for her to help the Doctor. He also informed her of his threat to have the Doctor go to UNIT if he did anything again. He talked for almost five minutes straight without pausing. When he finally did go quiet the other side of the line was silent. "Hello?"

"I'm still here," Martha answered, her voice further away from the phone. "I am getting dressed and I will be there as soon as possible. You and I are going to have a serious discussion once I get there. He is probably just exhausted from yesterday but I am also worried that he could be hiding from his problems. I will examine him once I get there but for now just let him sleep. Also did you have Owen examine him at all?"

"Not yet. I called you first," Jack admitted. "I will call him as soon as I am off the phone with you."

"That's not necessary. Unless he attempts to end it again or is showing signs of illness or infection, he is fine to sleep until I get there or until he wakes up on his own. I am heading out now and I will be there in a few hour," Martha informed him.

"Thank you Martha. For everything," Jack told her. He felt a little better then when he first picked up the phone but only time would make things right again. He disconnected the call before settling down to wait.

-DW-

The Doctor's mind felt hazy as he woke up. He groaned moving his arm to block the light that was shining down on his face. He didn't want to wake up but he needed a drink. Opening his eyes, he looked around his room. Fear filled him as his eyes settled on Martha. Jack had promised that he wasn't going to send him to UNIT but he must have changed his mind. The Doctor felt his eyes filling with tears. He didn't want to leave Jack.

"How are you feeling?" Martha asked, seeing that he was awake. Martha handed him a handkerchief to wipe his eyes as she saw the tears filling them. "Don't worry I am not here to take you to UNIT. Jack told me about his threat and if you try again, I will take you there myself." He didn't answer her as he felt a tear roll down his cheek. Martha moved to his door opening it.

"Jack can you come in here please, we have a very unhappy Time Lord," Martha called out. A moment later Jack appeared in the door way with a cup of tea in hand. He headed straight to the Doctor's bed, toed his shoes off and climbed up next to him. He pulled the Doctor into his arms. The Doctor cuddled close to him as Jack wrapped his arms tightly around him.

"You're not going anywhere," Jack cooed knowing the Doctor's worry. He picked up the cup of tea and helped the Doctor to take a drink.

"Though I have informed Jack that if he makes you panic like that again on purpose I am going to slap him hard enough he will feel it for a few days, regardless of how quickly he heals," Martha teased. The Doctor smiled as he decided that he liked Martha. "Jack and I have also discussed the fact that you are getting frustrated because your mind is working fine but your body isn't responding to it. Now I have a solution but I don't want you to rely on it. You still need to practice talking and learn to speak again."

"K," The Doctor answered finally, not sure where she was going. He smiled brightly though as she pulled out a large key keyboard with a small screen.

"This will allow you to say what you need to. I still want you to talk when you can but this will help you to communicate with us. Now is there something you want to say to Jack?" Martha asked. She made sure the computer was on and handed it to the Doctor, setting it on his lap. Jack released him so that the Doctor could use it. The Doctor's tongue went up to behind his top teeth as he pecked at the keys.

"I hate oatmeal." A robotic voice sounded after a moment. Jack couldn't stop the bark of laughter that came from his mouth.

"All right I won't give you oatmeal for breakfast anymore," Jack informed him. He kissed the Doctor on the top of the head.

"I meant an apology," Martha tutted, trying to hide her smile.

"Oh," The Doctor said. "Ss-ss-ss-oowe." He tried not wanting to use the machine. It sounded slurred and babyish but he had managed it.

"I am sorry too. I should have handled it differently then I did, but see you with the knife in your hand really hurt me. I felt as though I had failed you" Jack replied. The Doctor began to peck at the keys again. It was a little slow going but he had a voice back and so he was willing to keep trying.

"You didn't," The voice came. Jack hugged him a little tighter. Regardless of whether the Doctor forgave him, it would be a while before he forgave himself.


	14. Chapter 14

With a voice back the Doctor seemed happier then he had the last few days. He didn't fight or complain at Martha as she removed the bandage from his wrist and examined the stitches Jack had put in. Jack had did a good job though she just rewrapped his wrist. He made a face as she pulled a small bottle out of her pocket and decanted one of the pills into his hand. The Doctor recognized it as an antidepressant. He held it in his hand for a moment as he debated taking it.

"I know you may think you don't need them Doctor, but you will feel better if you take it," Jack whispered in his ear as he cuddled him closer. He had discussed getting the Doctor on anti-depressants with Martha before the Doctor woke up. He explained that the Doctor probably wouldn't take it willingly but he did agree that he needed to be on them. The Doctor stared at the pill for a moment before placing it in his mouth. Jack helped him wash it down with a drink of his tea.

"I want you to take one pill twice a day. I know with everything you have been through it may seem hard at the moment, but giving up is not the answer. Not even if you will just regenerate." Martha scolded him lightly.

"I shouldn't need pills," The computer said for the Doctor.

"Why not?" Jack asked him.

"I am a Time Lord," The Doctor answered. He hung his head as his face burned with embarrassment. Though he hated the pills he did agree that he needed them and would take it for now. Just until he could get back on his feet and feel more confidant in himself. As a Time Lord he shouldn't need them and had always been told it was a weakness that he had to use pills to help control his emotions.

"I don't understand why that means you don't need pills," Martha said. The Doctor hung his head further.

"I am a bad Time Lord." Martha opened her mouth to argue him but Jack shook his head no. He put his hand on the Doctor's chin and guided his head up so that he could look the Doctor in the eye. The Doctor refused to make eye contact with him still and stared at Jack's chin rather then meet his eyes.

"You are the best Time Lord I have ever met," Jack informed him. The Doctor smiled weakly. "Needing to take pills doesn't make you weak but strong because you are willing to admit that you need help." He kissed the Doctor on the cheek and the Doctor finally looked up to meet his eyes. Martha watched the two of them interact. She could see the love between the two of them and wondered if the other one realized it. She wasn't going to mention it because she didn't think the Doctor was ready for a relationship but she also wasn't going to deter them as Jack was good for the Doctor. She let them cuddle for a bit longer before getting Jack out of the Doctor's bed.

She was careful with him as she ran him through his daily stretches. He even stood on his own, with a little support from Jack, for almost thirty seconds before he began to wobble. He tightened his grip on Jack before he fell and though he was breathing hard he managed not to go in to a full on panic attack. Jack gently eased him into his wheelchair, kissing him on the head.

"You are doing so well," Jack informed him happily.

"I agree with Jack. I am happy with the progress that you are making. Next time I come down I am going to bring a walker with me and we are going to work on getting you standing for longer." The Doctor made a face to show his distaste at the thought of using a walker. "Don't give me that look. It will only be for a short time until you are strong enough to walk on your own."

"You want to be able to run again don't you?" Jack questioned the Doctor.

"Yes," The Doctor answered.

"Then the walker will help you to achieve that by building up your leg muscles," Jack explained to him. The Doctor sighed. He pointed at his computer that had been left on the bed. Jack grabbed it for him, positioning it on his lap so that he could peck at the keys.

"You can help me," The Doctor told Jack cheekily.

"I can yes, but by using the walker you will have more freedom then having to wait on me," Jack explained.

"In time with the walker you will be able to get out of bed on your own, use the loo, make meals for yourself or even just go outside on the pier," Martha added trying to make the Time Lord see the good in using the walker. It was obvious that he wasn't going for it though as he continued to stare at them in disgust. He understood them wanting him to use it but he didn't like the idea.

"Just think about it for now Doctor. Martha will be back next week with the walker and by then I am sure you will see it is a good idea," Jack told him. The Doctor shook his head. He didn't see how he would ever see it as a good idea. After Martha left them for the day, Jack went to heat the oven to make the Doctor chips for lunch. The Doctor was looking at his computer as they went to the kitchen.

"Do you want me to leave?" The Doctor asked as he stared at Jack for the answer. Jack set the temperature on the oven before coming over to kneel in front of the Doctor.

"No, I want you to be here with me. You may drive me crazy sometimes but I enjoy your company. I have missed you so much and the thought of losing you again, even if you are just a few hours away, breaks my heart," Jack explained to the Doctor. The Doctor nodded and then looked back at his computer. He typed away on it for a moment.

"My Jack," The Doctor said aloud. He then used the computer to finish his thought. "I would miss you too." Jack took his hand and kissed it. As he prepared the chips and made a side dish, the Doctor babbled away on the computer about an artifact that he had seen in Jack's office. It took a little bit to get use to the fact that it was robotic voice but it was nice hearing the Doctor going on again about something he found interesting. He was going to have to find a way to tell Martha thank you for bring the Doctor back to him.

After breakfast Jack took the Doctor to his office so that he could examine the artifact that he had been explaining all during breakfast. What Jack thought to just be a simple sword turned out in fact to be one that was used in rituals to knight people on the planet Regalous. The Doctor explained the inlay on it was the design of the royal family and that the fact the sword had gone missing may cause problems depending on the year it was lost. The royal family had been over thrown after two hundred years. If the sword was lost during their rule many would pay until it was returned. The Doctor though didn't mention returning the sword, just explained its history.

"Do you want to take it back?" Jack asked him as he held the sword for the Doctor to look at.

"No," The Doctor answered with a small shake of his head. He wasn't sure when the sword was from but if it gave the people the strength to over throw the rulers then he had to let history take its course. The royal family had oppressed the citizens on Regalous to the point the planet was deep in poverty. Once they were overthrown Regalous became a popular tourist spot known for its unique cloth and blankets that were produced. The Doctor even owned several of the blankets, though they weren't very good for warmth but Susan had loved them and they still laid on the bed in her room. He teared up slightly at the thought of his beloved granddaughter. Of everyone he had lost that horrible last day, he missed her the most.

"Are you all right?" Jack asked as he noticed the tears forming in the Doctor's eyes.

"Yes," The Doctor lied reaching up to wipe them away. He stopped though as Jack gently placed his hand on his cheek and thumbed the tear away.

"What's the matter?" Jack questioned him softly.

"I miss Susan," The Doctor admitted. The Doctor didn't think that he could cry anymore over the loss of his planet, but with the admission the tears began to flow freely once more. Jack sat down the sword, wrapping his arms around the Doctor to hold him tightly. He cried not only for the loss of his granddaughter, but also for his mother, children and friends. He cried until he couldn't cry anymore and drifted off to sleep in Jack's arms. Noticing he had gone quiet, Jack eased him back to find that the Doctor was asleep. He left the Doctor to sleep in his chair as he went around the desk to get work done. He thought about taking the Doctor to his room to sleep but he didn't want him out of his sight, especially after what had happened yesterday.

The Doctor only slept for about an hour before he was up again. He was more subdue then before, not using the computer to talk more then a few words. Jack took him around the desk and let him use the main Torchwood computer to look at the artifacts that he had. The Doctor flipped through a few pages as Jack worked beside him.

"Jack," The Doctor said after a moment, as he tried to get Jack's attention.

"Yes Doctor?" Jack asked. The Doctor pointed at Jack's screen and Jack saw that he had typed the word Sonic on it. Jack debated giving it to him. He had the sonic locked up in the same cupboard that he had the TARDIS keys. He knew that the Doctor could use the sonic to hack the computer quickly or get into things he didn't belong in. Not having the sonic wouldn't stop him from doing either but it would take him longer.

"P-p-ease?" The Doctor asked Jack. Jack couldn't say no. He went to the locker and using his body blocked the Doctor from being able to see the code that he was putting in. He pulled the sonic out of the locker and held it to the Doctor.

"If I catch you breaking into my vault, I will take it away again," Jack warned him. The Doctor reached for his own computer and a few minutes later Jack heard the words.

"I don't need sonic to break into a vault." The Doctor smiled at him before turning back to the main computer. Jack just stared at him wondering what sort of trouble the Doctor was going to get into now they were helping him to learn to walk again. Still he looked forward to it.

The Doctor spent the rest of the day going through Jack's artifacts and artifacts that Torchwood had collected over the years. He used the sonic to change the information on the computer so that he didn't have to use the keyboard. As interested as he was in the information, he was actually thankful when Jack informed him it was dinner time. He was getting tired and just wanted to eat and go to bed. Jack made them a light supper. Afterwards he tucked the Doctor into bed, kissing him goodnight. The Doctor feel asleep almost immediately. Jack debated joining him for a few hours but the last few times he had slept in the Doctor's bed it had gone badly. He wondered if he would ever have a chance with the Doctor. Needing to rest he headed to his own room to sleep for a few hours.

-DW-

Jack planned to have a normal day at the hub the next day as he went into the Doctor's room to get him out of bed. He had paperwork that needed to be done and he planned to set the Doctor loose on the artifacts information to entertain him for a few hours. He went through their normal routine of cleaning the Doctor and then helping him to take a bath. He changed out the bandage on the Doctor's wrist, kissing his wrist softly in the process. The Doctor reached out and gently stroked his head, perfectly at ease laying naked on the bed while Jack tended to him. How much he trusted him amazed Jack and it was another reason he would never take advantage of the Doctor. He picked up the clothes that he had picked out for the day and the Doctor looked at the plain trousers with a white shirt in confusion. He reached over to his computer that laid near his head.

"I need my suit," The Doctor informed Jack using the computer.

"I can dress you in it if you want me to but we are just going to be in the hub today," Jack answered him.

"What about UNIT?" The Doctor questioned. With everything that happened the last two days, Jack really didn't feel like making the drive up there. He was planning on just rescheduling the Doctor's speech therapy for next week.

"I didn't think you liked James," Jack stated, still not moving to get the Doctor's suit.

"I want to talk," The Doctor answered. Jack couldn't argue that. The Doctor use to talk constantly and though he had a voice back with the machine, it still had to be frustrating for him.

"All right I will take you to UNIT," Jack agreed. Hoping he wasn't making a mistake, he began to pull out the Doctor's suit.

-DW-

Jack was smarter about getting the Doctor into the SUV this time. Though he still had to put him in first, he waited until he had got in on the drivers side to buckle him in. Then he he held the Doctor's hands tightly as the Doctor tensed, ready to go into a panic attack. Jack was worried that he wasn't going to be able to handle being buckled in again so soon after panicking for nearly a half hour the day before because of being restrained. Holding his hands though was allowing the Doctor to focus on something besides the belt across his waist. He still didn't like it, regardless of whether or not it was necessary.

"Breathe sweetheart, nothing is going to hurt you," Jack reassured him as he waited for the Doctor to calm down. The Doctor closed his eyes as he continued trying to breathe. He managed not to go into a panic attack as he held Jack's hands tightly. He was just reluctant to let them go even as he calmed down. Jack had to drive though and couldn't just hold his hands the entire time. He left his eyes closed as Jack released his grip and pulled out of the hub. Once on the road, Jack took his hands again, using one hand to drive and letting the Doctor hold onto him with the other. It took him longer to get to UNIT then normal because he made sure to drive slower and not stop fast or do anything that would cause the belt to tighten and send the Doctor into panic. The Doctor's eyes remained closed the entire ride, but he didn't sleep as he held on to Jack.

"We're here," Jack told the Doctor softly when they stopped. The Doctor opened his eyes as Jack unbuckled him. The familiar place was in front of him and he was relieved to see it. Even though he wanted to come to UNIT he didn't like the ride up. Jack left him alone in the SUV for a moment to get his wheelchair. His door was opened and Martha smiled at him.

"I didn't expect to see you so soon," She commented as Jack came around with his chair.

"He has his speech therapy today," Jack informed her. The Doctor nodded.

"Well since you are here, we can see about getting you standing with the walker today," Martha commented.

"No," The Doctor answered as Jack lifted him out of the SUV. He looked around for his computer. Jack pulled it out of the back seat, setting it down on his lap. He tapped the keys for a moment before looking up at Martha. "I don't need the walker."

"You do if you want to walk again. You aren't going to be able to use crutches at the moment because of your motor control and the longer you fight using the walker, the longer it is going to take to get you on your feet again," Martha explained. The Doctor made a rude noise at her with his mouth.

"Oi, be nice," Jack scolded him. "Now you have your speech therapy first and then I am sure that the Brigadier will want a cuppa with you. After that we can discuss your willingness to use the walker."

"K," The Doctor sighed loudly. He didn't look at Martha as she walked beside them to Jame's office. James was finishing up with a patient so they had to wait a few minutes for the Doctor's turn. Martha didn't push him or talk about using the walker again. Instead she bid them fair well, leaving them in the waiting room.

"At least try the walker Doctor. If you don't like it, or can't use it at least you tried," Jack told him. The Doctor glared at Jack.

"I don't want a walker," The Doctor argued. He was obviously becoming angry and with his willingness to come to UNIT in the first. Jack dropped the subject as well as the door opened.

"Welcome back Doctor. How are you doing today?" James asked him happily. The Doctor glared at Jack again then turned to James.

"G-g-ood," He stuttered slightly but got the word out cleaner then the last time. He smiled proud of himself. James went around the chair to push him into his office as Jack made no move to stand or follow. The Doctor noticed and tensed slightly. Despite his willingness to talk to James he didn't want to be without Jack. "Jack?"

"Yes," Jack asked still not moving.

"P-p-ease Jack," The Doctor said. Jack stood and followed them into the office. Despite his irritation with the Doctor at the moment, he wasn't going to make the Doctor suffer. He sat in the back of the office listening to the Doctor and James talk and the Doctor trying to say the letters James wanted him to. They focused on the letter t for the day with the Doctor relearning to make the different t sounds. The Doctor did well not arguing with James once as Jack listened. He even laughed as he tried to over pronounce the TH sound and made a rude noise with his mouth. About five minutes prior to the end of his session it was James who called it to a halt early.

"You have done very well today Doctor. I want you to keep working on the T sound this week and next week we will focus on a new letter. Now before you go I understand that Martha has given you a computer to help you talk. Is that correct?" James asked. He wasn't told why the Doctor had received it only that he had been given it.

"Yes," The Doctor answered slightly hesitant to tell him.

"I am not going to say you can't use it. I do want you talking when you can say the words and not relying on the computer to talk for you. Also I want you to practice saying words you have trouble with. You can practice with Jack or in front of a mirror but I want you to practice at least a half an hour a day. Can you do that for me?" James asked him. The Doctor nodded that didn't sound to hard.

He was in a better mood again as Jack took him to the Brigadiers for tea and lunch. The Brigadier made sure to have sandwiches and crisp waiting for them this time rather then just Jammie Dodgers. The Doctor happily made his way through two sandwiches as he joined in the conversation. It took him longer to reply but the Brigadier was patient with him as they joked about the last time he had worked for UNIT. Jack almost hated to take him to Martha afterwards but he had to be the bad guy if he was going to help the Doctor. He gave the Doctor as long as he could before wheeling him out of the Brigadier's place and to the hospital.

Once in the hospital all illusions of a happy, compliant Time Lord were gone. He crossed his arms and glared at the two of them with all the anger of the Oncoming Storm as Martha approached with the walker. As Jack tried to pick him up, he went limp in Jack's arms, making it hard for Jack to hold him.

"You need to put your feet down Doctor. You will see that using the walker isn't that bad if you at least give it a shot," Jack informed the Doctor. The Doctor though wouldn't put his feet down and he closed his eyes tightly refusing to look at the walker.

"Stop being silly," Jack scolded him, sick of the game. The Doctor stayed as limp as ever not giving in. Finally Jack had enough. He sat the Doctor back in his chair, turning and leaving the office. He closed the door behind him loudly causing the Doctor to jump.

"Jack?" The Doctor questioned opening his eyes.

"He left," Martha answered. Grabbing his computer, she set it down on his lap before she pulled up a chair so that she could look the Doctor in the eyes. "Why don't you want to use the walker?"

"I hate it," The Doctor replied. "I hate all of this. I want my life back."

"I know you do and the walker will help you to achieve that. I know it may seem horrible but if you give it a chance you will be back on your feet," Martha informed him. He glared at the walker again, kicking at it. "If I thought you could handle crutches we would use them or if you can tell me another option you can try we will go with it." Martha waited but the Doctor had no reply. As much as he hated it the walker was his best option and he could either use it now or he could keep fighting them and use it in a few weeks. Either way he was going to end up needing it before he could walk without it.

"I will use it," he told her.

"All right. I am going to get one of my doctors in here to help you stand." Martha went to the door and grabbed one of the doctors who wasn't busy. The Doctor glared at him as he entered. "Doctor I would like you to meet doctor Cooper. Now Adam can you please assist me in getting the Doctor to his feet with the walker. We need to take it slow and you have to watch your grip as he is subject to panic attacks if he feels restrained."

"Jack?" The Doctor questioned as Adam went around him to help him up.

"I don't know where Jack is at the moment," Martha replied. He fought Adam slightly as he was helped to his feet and then took hold of the walker. He was able to hold himself up with it, with Adam helping to support him. Even if he didn't like it, he did feel more confidant with it. "Good job. Do you want to try to take a step?"

"No," The Doctor answered.

"I think you could," Jack told him as he came back into the room. The Doctor brightened as Jack came up to him. He took over where Adam was standing, supporting the Doctor's waist as he stood. Feeling more confidant with Jack back, he took a tiny step forward then dragged his right foot to meet his left. He smiled as Jack kissed him on the back of the neck, proud of his progress. "I knew you could do it."

"Good job today Doctor. I am going to let you take the walker back to the hub with you so that you can stand with Jack's help. I don't want you using it on your own yet. Do you understand?" Martha told him.

"Yes," The Doctor replied. He sat down in his chair again as Jack loaded up the walker. The Doctor now had daily stretches, speech therapy and he was going to have to use the walker. For the last two years Jack's life had revolved around the Doctor but now it didn't seem as though he was going to have time for anything else with also having to help the Doctor eat, bathe and general daily care. Still they were on the right track so he was happy with the progress even if he felt a little overwhelmed. Taking the Doctor to the SUV, he loaded him in the passenger side to begin his trip back to Cardiff.

-DW-

Jack had been right that the Doctor was going to take up all of his time again for awhile but he didn't find it as hard as he thought he would. Unlike when he first began to care for the Doctor, the accomplishments he was seeing were ones they could both rejoice in. He knew he wouldn't end up with nightmares unlike the Doctor's first minor accomplishments of that he had survived the night or that he still could swallow so it was unnecessary to shove a tube down his throat. In his nightmares the Doctor had died or ended up needing on life support in order to live. To watch the Doctor living and interacting had helped to slow the nightmares but Jack wondered if they would ever be completely gone. Though he knew it wouldn't give him nightmares to see the Doctor use the walker, it still broke his heart to watch the Doctor struggle.

It took a few days for the Doctor to warm up to the walker. Even though it allowed him to stand and move around without help, he still looked at it like it was a dalek. He refused to stand at it without Jack's help and when he did walk it was only for a few steps at a time. He was making progress though and that was what counted in Jack's eyes, regardless of how stubborn the Time Lord was being. He was talking better even without the computer to assist him and for the first time since he woke up, Jack was hopeful that the Doctor would be able to have his old life back. On the third day since receiving the walker, Jack stood behind the Doctor as he very slowly walked out of his room on his own. His face was a mask of pure concentration but he was getting into a good rhythm of moving the walker first and then shuffling forward after it.

"Can you make him a cuppa?" Jack asked Gwen as they headed to a chair.

"Of course," Gwen answered happily, just as proud to see the Doctor walking. She had been there to support him almost as long as Jack and while she wasn't as involved in his care she still knew of his struggle and how far he had come.

"Jack," The Doctor whined as he started to wobble. He was close to his destination but he didn't feel as though he could make it.

"Just a few more steps," Jack reassured him. Rather then picking the Doctor up and carrying him the last few steps, he stepped forward and placed his hands on the Doctor's hips. The Doctor took a deep breath and then shuffled forward again. He made it to his chair and flopped down in it feeling completely worn out and ready for a nap. Though it wasn't even ten feet from his door to where the chair was waiting he still felt as though he had ran a marathon.

"No mo-mo-re," The Doctor whined as he panted.

"For now but you will be up walking again later. Then tomorrow Martha comes in and she is going to want to evaluate your progress and see what she can do to help you walk better," Jack informed him. The Doctor didn't have his computer but Jack didn't need it in order to understand the look that the Doctor was giving him. He still went to get it for the Doctor though as Gwen came over with his tea. She held the cup and allowed him to drink some of it before setting it on the table. Jack sat his computer down next to the tea. The Doctor pecked at the keys for a moment before glaring at Jack.

"I don't need to be poked twice a week," he complained.

"She does more then poke you. Martha has worked hard on developing stretches to keep you from developing atrophy as well as keeping you healthy these last two years. We will talk to her tomorrow when she comes and if she says you can cut the amount of appointments you need down then we will at that time. If she says she still wants to see you twice a week though I am going to keep letting her see you twice a week," Jack told the Doctor.

"Fine," The Doctor sighed. With a shaking hand, he picked up his cup of tea and tried to take a drink. He ended up spilling some of it on his suit. He didn't ask Jack for help though, so Jack let him drink without assistance. He made the Doctor toast with marmalade for breakfast. The Doctor ate happily though he was suspicious of Jack. His suspicions were answered as after breakfast Jack carried him back to the bedroom, laying him down on his bed.

"Jack?" He questioned in concern as Jack closed the door behind them. He had all ready been bathed and he wasn't tired so he wasn't sure what was going on.

"You're all right. I am just going to remove your catheter. Now that you are able to stand and walk the distance to the loo, you no longer need it," Jack explained to him. He nodded though he wasn't sure about having it removed. He hated it and normally he had the bladder control that he didn't have to worry about making it to the loo. He was finding though that nothing on his body was working right and he would be mortified if he ended up wetting his trousers. "We can put it back in if you still need it, but I think you are ready to use the loo or a bottle if necessary."

"K," he answered at last. He lay there stiff as Jack removed his trousers then removed the tube. Jack pulled his trousers back up.

"Let me know when you have to use the loo and I will help you get to it," Jack told him as he was carried back to his chair. He nodded, his face flush with embarrassment. There was a lot Jack had done for him the last two years, but he hadn't been awake to know it. Now he was going to have to let Jack take him to the loo when he had to use it. Looking at his tea he decided he didn't want it anymore.


	15. Chapter 15

As the day progressed, Jack grew more and more concerned with the Doctor. Though he was still working quietly at one of the workstations, he had stopped drinking tea. Jack couldn't remember a time that the Doctor didn't want tea, but now the Doctor had let one cuppa go stone cold and hadn't had another in almost three hours. Jack took him another thinking that he had just grown distracted by his work. It was almost lunch time by then so he left the Doctor to go order pizza for everyone. Returning to the Doctor's side, he checked the cup, seeing that it was still just sitting there untouched. Jack pulled up the chair next to the Doctor.

"Why aren't you drinking?" He asked the Doctor softly so as not to embarrass the Time Lord.

"I'm not thirsty," The Doctor replied on the computer screen that he was working on without looking up from his work. He licked his lips slightly though as the thought of a cuppa sounded good. His mouth felt as though he had cotton in it and the tea would also help to clear his mind. He didn't want to drink though so he ignored his thirst.

"Don't lie to me," Jack hissed, keeping his voice low. "I normally have to keep a kettle on the oven at all times to keep up with the amount of tea you drink." He stood up and picked the Doctor up in his arms, pulling him away from his work. "Pizza is on order, can you please listen for it if I am not back out?"

"No problem," Tosh answered as she continued her work on the rift. The Doctor looked at her screen but Jack whisked him away before he could finish reading it. Once more he was carried back to his room and sat on his bed. Jack closed the door behind them. Coming around the edge of the bed, he took the Doctor's computer in his hands and sat down next to the Time Lord.

"What is really bothering you and don't tell me you aren't thirsty again because I know you are," Jack questioned him.

"I am," The Doctor admitted.

"Then why don't you have a nice hot cuppa?" Jack tried to tempt him. The Doctor leaned over slightly so that he could reach the keyboard better. Jack waited patiently for him to reply as the Doctor kept typing.

"Because then I will have to use the loo," The Doctor admitted finally. Jack didn't answer him for a moment as the Doctor stared at him. He hadn't asked if the Doctor was ready for the catheter to come out. He had just assumed that the Doctor was ready because he was able to walk far enough to get to the loo.

"Do you want me to put the catheter back in?" Jack questioned him. The Doctor shook his head no at first. "Having the catheter back in isn't a set back Doctor. I want you to feel comfortable with the care you are receiving and help me and Martha to get you back on your feet. In order to do that though you have to let us know if we are taking things too quickly. That being said you have to understand we will push you if we feel you are trying to stall because you are afraid. I can't imagine that you would willing feel you need the catheter again unless you truly still need it. So I want you to to tell me the truth and if I took it out too early then you need to let me know" The Doctor was relieved that Jack understood without his having to explain. Slowly, he nodded at Jack. "I thought you would be happy to have it out."

"I am but I can't walk well," The Doctor answered as he looked Jack in the eye.

"And you are afraid that you will have an accident?" Jack concluded. The Doctor's cheeks were bright red as he nodded again.

"So I will ask you one more time. Do you need it?" Jack questioned giving the Doctor a chance to change his mind.

"Yes," The Doctor answered him.

"All right wait here a moment while I got and get another one." He left the Doctor alone for a moment while he retrieved a new catheter from the medical room. Returning to the Doctor's side, he helped him to lay down, stripping him of his trousers. The Doctor didn't look at Jack but tightened his grip on the bed as Jack carefully placed the new tube. Once the Doctor's trousers were back up Jack smiled at him. "There we will try again in a few days, if you are ready."

"K," The Doctor agreed readily.

"Also, if you wanted me to keep touching you all you had to do was ask," Jack flirted with the Doctor. He rolled his eyes.

"Jack," The Doctor groaned but he had a grin on his face. Jack kissed him on the side of the head.

"How about a nice hot cuppa?" Jack offered once more.

"Pease," The Doctor agreed. He kissed Jack on the side of the cheek as Jack scooped him up in his arms. Jack set him down in his chair, then presented with a hot cuppa soon after. The Doctor drank it thirstily as Jack held the cup. He finished it off with a sigh.

"I will make you another," Jack told him happy to see him drinking again. He made the Doctor a second cuppa and set it close to the Doctor. The Doctor reached for it and drank another half of the cup before he finally was done drinking. For lunch he ate his share of the pizza and another cup of tea. Feeling full and sleepy, he then stood on his own. Regardless of whether or not he liked the walker it was nice to be able to make his way to his room without any help. Though once there Jack supported him as he climbed up on his bed. He yawned wrapping himself around a pillow. Jack tucked him in, kissing him softly on the head.

"Sleep well," Jack whispered to him, but the Doctor was all ready snoring softly. Chuckling Jack made his way back out into the hub.

-DW-

Though the Doctor looked as if he were resting peacefully when Jack checked in on him, in his dreams he was back in the corridor. Ianto had once more slammed him against the floor. His face was wet with tears, his body aching from the horrible things that Ianto had done to him. Things that even in his memories he avoided though he could see his trousers laying nearby. He couldn't cry out for help as Ianto's grip tightened around his neck. His hands were still tied so he couldn't even pull at Ianto's hands to try to save himself. His only hope was keeping his respiratory bipass from kicking in long enough for Ianto to believe he was dead. In his mind though he was all ready running towards the TARDIS, trying to get to her safety even as he stared up at his attacker. Defiant to the end he refused to look at Ianto even as he choked him.

"You're weak," Ianto hissed at him. "You are going to die on the floor of this building and just be seen as one of the statistics of the battle. The battle you couldn't stop from happening. What good is a bloody Time Machine if you don't save people." With that Ianto slammed his head down on the floor. Stars flashed in front of his eyes. Closing them he gave into his lungs screaming for air and allowed his bi-pass to take over. It would allow him ten minutes before he had to breathe again. Ten minutes for his attacker to either leave him or realize he wasn't dead. Even with his Time Lord senses it seemed like longer then ten minutes had passed before his neck was released.

"Burn in hell," Ianto spat kicking him in the side. Standing in the door way of the TARDIS he closed it not wanting to see what happened next. He pushed the memory far back in his mind burying it with everything else he didn't want to remember. The days of the Time War, him, and secrets he had to keep safe. Opening his eyes, he felt her coldness at him but over time he could convince himself that he had escaped.

-DW-

The Doctor opened his eyes. He was safe in his room in Torchwood. The memories of what happened two years ago pushed back once more. He knew something bad had happened to him, could guess what happened by the fact that Ianto had removed his trousers but he wasn't ready to deal with it. Lifting his arm, he ran his fingers down the raised scar on his wrist. He should have used a sharper knife, or been quicker so that Jack couldn't stop him. Hearing Jack approach his room, he closed his eyes once more, pretending to be asleep until he heard the door shut.

He opened his eyes once more staring at the door. He was confused by Jack. Jack kissed him freely and he never complained but Jack refused to share his bed again. He thought Jack loved him but now he wasn't sure if it was love or if Jack just was his caregiver. Jack was from another time where open displays of affection were normal. Had the last two years changed Jack's opinion of him? Was Ianto right and Jack saw him as weak for not being able to stop the attack. His thoughts were interrupted when the door opened again.

"I thought you might be waking up," Jack informed him. In his hand was a hot cup of tea and a banana. "I made you a snack to tide you over until supper is ready. I am making soup so it needs to cook for awhile." Jack sat his tea down on the bed side table and handed him the banana. Jack had all ready opened it so the Doctor could eat it easily. Just like tea it was rare for the Doctor to turn down a banana so he could safely guess that it would be eaten. The Doctor smiled as he took it.

"Jack?" He questioned, taking a bite of the fruit.

"Yes Doctor?" Jack wondered.

"What happened to Ianto?" The Doctor asked. He was thinking about past conversations he overheard and was beginning to piece together it. He was sure that Ianto was the one who was transferred out of Torchwood on the day Sarah Jane came to visit but he wasn't sure why. If Jack knew that Ianto had been responsible for attacking him, why had he kept them both at Torchwood for two years.

"He is imprisoned at UNIT," Jack answered, not sure why the Doctor was asking.

"But he was here," The Doctor told Jack. The look on the Doctor's face made it clear that he wasn't asking a question but was stating a fact. He knew that Ianto had been at Torchwood.

"Yes. I kept him locked down in the cells for awhile," Jack admitted. He sat down on the side of the Doctor's bed. "I didn't know what else to do with him. He wanted to go to prison or to UNIT but I didn't want to go through a trial if he pleaded not guilty all of a sudden. He had admitted what he did so I locked him down in the cells where he couldn't harm anyone else."

"You loved him?" The Doctor questioned.

"At one time yes. After he hurt you though I hated him, more so because I had loved him." Jack had felt the same way about the Doctor at one time. He had forgiven the Doctor for leaving him behind though. He doubted that he would ever forgive Ianto for hurting the Doctor. The Doctor reached out and took his hand. He smiled as the Doctor brought his hand up, kissing his knuckles. Not wanting to discuss it anymore, Jack took the pause in the conversation as a good place to end it. He stood up from the Doctor's bed, heading to the door. "Finish your banana then you can come out into the hub with me."

"Jack," The Doctor whispered as he watched Jack go. Turning around Jack saw the rejection written all over the Doctor's face. Realizing he made a mistake, he went back into the room. Sitting down on the edge of the Doctor's bed, he placed a hand gently on the Doctor's check. His heart was pounding as he hoped he hadn't misread the Doctor. Leaning in he hesitantly placed his lips against the Doctor's cool mouth. The Doctor didn't return the kiss at first. He seemed frozen and Jack started to pull back. The Doctor's mouth followed him though, opening slightly as he kissed Jack back. Jack could taste tea and banana, just like he imagined the Doctor would taste like. Breaking the kiss, he leaned back looking the Doctor in the eyes.

Jack chastised himself softly for kissing the Doctor while at the same time his heart was still pounding. He was relieved to see that there was no fear in the Doctor's eyes after their kiss. The Doctor was just looking at him curiously in a way that made Jack feel as though he were being analyzed.

"What?" Jack questioned.

"My Jack," The Doctor answered him happily.

-DW-

The rest of the day was quiet as the Doctor ate his soup for dinner and then the two of them watched several movies before going to bed. The Doctor was asleep early again that night and Jack settled down in front of the rift computer to get work done. He was now several days behind and if he didn't actually start working on it, he was never going to catch it. He was absorbed in readings from the rift when he heard a thumping noise followed by shuffling. Looking at the clock he saw that it was just after two in the morning. The Doctor wasn't normally up this early, that Jack knew of. Turning in his chair he was the Doctor with a look of pure concentration on his face as he made his way across the hub.

"Making a run for it won't stop Martha from examining you today," Jack commented as the Doctor was heading across the hub by himself. He had gotten into a good rhythm and was almost to the hub door.

"S-s-st-star-stars," The Doctor stuttered, still heading towards the door. He was in only a pair of trousers and his feet were bare. Jack shook his head as he stood.

"You need your shoes and a coat if you are planning on going outside," Jack chastised him but didn't try to stop him. He stood and headed to the Doctor's room instead. Rather then try to get the Doctor's shoes on him, he grabbed a pair of slippers and the Doctor's coat. Despite what the Doctor thought it was a cool night and he didn't want him to catch a cold. When he got back out he was surprised the Doctor had reached the door and was trying to balance himself with one hand while sonicing the lock with the other.

"If you would be patient for a moment I will open the door for you," Jack informed him. The Doctor made a humph noise with his mouth but he lowered the sonic, secretly relieved that he could grab the walker again with both hands. As much progress as he was making, he was still too weak to stand for long without supporting himself with both arms. Even the walk to the door had worn him out and if it wasn't for the fact that he wanted to go outside he would sit down at the rift computer. Looking around the hub he spotted his chair as Jack came over.

"Ch-ch-ch-air," He managed to say.

"You want your wheelchair?" Jack questioned slightly surprised. He knew how much the Doctor hated the thing regardless of the fact he needed it. It was obvious though that he hated the walker more.

"Yes," The Doctor admitted. Jack deterred slightly to get the Doctor's chair for him before continuing to the Doctor. The Doctor had to remain standing for a moment as Jack helped him to get his coat on then he sunk down into the chair with a sigh. Not wanting the Doctor to get cold, he still put the Doctor's slippers on his feet before pushing him out into the cool Cardiff night. The stars they could see were few against the bright lights that lit the city but the Doctor still stared up at them with wonder in his eyes.

"I would black out the city so that you can see them all, but the last time I did, I was officially reprimanded by Harriet Jones." Jack chuckled. The Doctor looked at him curiously.

"How?" He wondered.

"Well not over her knee like I wanted..."

"Jack," The Doctor interrupted, drawing Jack's name out. Jack smiled and dropped a kiss on the Doctor's head before standing next to him.

"I was messing with the rift, trying to find a way to track things that are taken from Earth. I made a mistake with one of the calculations, causing the rift to spike and mess with the power grid. I apologized but I was still reprimanded," Jack explained to the Doctor. The Doctor nodded. He wished he had his computer with him so that he could ask Jack if he could look at the calculations. It sounded similar to the work that he had seen Tosh doing but she too was making a critical mistake in them. The calculations he had seen only accounted for the rift opening up in one location when it was obvious by the artifacts that had come through it opened in many. Still the calculations they were performing were very advanced and he was amazed they had even managed to get as far as they did.

Jack stood and pushed the Doctor further out on the pier so that they could feel the mist of the water on their skin. He knelt down in front of the Doctor, leaning in between his legs. The Doctor trembled slightly as Jack pressed their lips together, kissing him softly in the moonlight. The Doctor closed his eyes as he opened his mouth slightly to allow Jack to kiss him deeper. He reached up wrapping his arms around Jack pulling him closer. Jack's warm body felt nice against the cool air. He broke the kiss, resting his head on Jack's chest. Jack held him back as he stared out at the night sky.

"You need to go back to bed now," Jack informed him softly when he yawned. He nodded snuggling into Jack's chest more. Jack carefully lifted in his arms and carried him back to the hub, planning on getting his wheelchair in a little bit. He laid the Doctor down on his bed, removing his slippers and coat. "Sleep well sweetheart." Jack kissed him on the cheek as he tucked him into his bed.

"St-st-st," He stuttered, still not able to get the word out.

"Not now," Jack answered. The Doctor narrowed his eyes as he reached for his computer.

"Why not?" The Doctor wondered.

"Because every time I stay you have nightmares," Jack informed him. Not adding the last time that he had stayed with the Doctor in his bed that the Doctor had tried to kill himself. He absentmindedly ran his fingers down the healing cut on the Doctor's wrist. The Doctor didn't miss the movement.

"I have nightmares anyways," The Doctor reminded Jack. He snuggled down deeper into his blanket and looked up at Jack with sad eyes. "I c-c-c-old," He whined. Jack took a deep breath.

"I will stay with you only until you fall asleep," Jack informed him. The Doctor nodded eagerly. "Budge up." Jack kicked his shoes off and climbed up on the bed next to the Doctor. The Doctor cuddled up next to him, laying his head on Jack's chest. Jack wrapped an arm around the Doctor to hold him close as the Doctor fell asleep. As he drifted off though, his arm was thrown across Jack's stomach and one leg crossed over Jack's, pinning him in the bed. Swearing softly though not as angry as he tried to be, Jack settled down to rest as the Doctor's pillow for the night.

After an hour of laying there and letting the Doctor sleep, Jack carefully untangled himself from the Doctor's arms. The Doctor whimpered softly, trying to curl back around Jack and reclaim the warmth he had lost. Jack was ready for him though and quickly removed his shirt, wrapping it around the Doctor's pillow for the Doctor to hold. The Doctor snuggled into it as he let out a sigh and settled back down. Jack stood quietly beside the bed for a moment to make sure the Doctor was really asleep again before creeping back out into the hub. The first thing he did upon entering the room was grab the nearest chair to him and fling it towards the hub door. It hit the door with a thunk, but did nothing to change his mood.

"Stupid, stupid, stupid," Jack repeated to himself as he sat down hard in another chair. He had a lot of time to think the last hour and all he could think about was the fact that he shouldn't even be attempting a relationship with the Time Lord at the moment. He knew the Doctor still had a long way to go before he was back on his feet. He had been the one to pick the Doctor's limp body up off of the floor of Torchwood and carry him back to the TARDIS. He had sat by the Doctor's side day after day just hoping the Doctor would wake up. Then he had cared for the Doctor for over two years for the small chance that the Doctor would return to him. He had read every textbook he could get his hands on about brain injuries and rehabilitation once the person woke up. The Doctor being a Time Lord didn't follow what the books said exactly but close enough that the information was still relevant.

"I have to break it off," Jack told himself softly as he ran his fingers through his hair. The Doctor was still repressing the memories of what Ianto did to his body. Jack wasn't about to take the risk of awakening those memories before the Time Lord was ready to deal with them. The Doctor had all ready tried to kill himself once because of the memories, what would happen if they returned because Jack was careless. He wouldn't put it past the Doctor to try again and he feared that he wouldn't be able to stop him if he did. It was only pure dumb luck that he hadn't put the Doctor's copy of the key on the TARDIS like he originally planned to but instead locked it in his office safe along with the Doctor's sonic screwdriver.

"I can't," he whispered leaning back in the chair. He had been alone for so long as he cared for the man that he loved. He was tired of being alone and welcomed the affection the Doctor gave him. If he closed his eyes he could still feel the cool lips soft against his and taste the tea the Doctor liked to drink. He had come to know every inch of the Doctor's body as he cared for it while the Doctor's mind was away. Now he wanted to relearn that same body and find out what it liked. He was willing to give the Doctor as much time as he needed to get to that point and if it never happened, Jack realized he would be all right with that as well. Standing up Jack grabbed the chair and straightened it. He then took the Doctor's walker from beside the door where it had been left and positioned it beside his bed for the morning. Last he went to get the wheelchair.

Rather then take it back in though, he sat down and stared at the stars. They were beginning to fade as the sun was creeping up over the horizon. Soon the Doctor would be up and Jack's day would be filled with tending to him. Though he didn't mind it, he secretly wished that he would walk into the hub to find the Doctor standing there in his brown suit. The TARDIS would be parked beside the rift manipulator and the Doctor would be babbling away, in his own voice, about some planet he had just returned from. Taking a deep breath Jack knew it was something the could work towards. He had worried the Doctor wouldn't be able to walk again when he woke up, now it was only a matter of time before he was running. Not wanting the Doctor to wake up to an empty hub, Jack stood and reluctantly took the chair back into the hub.

He tried to work, but all he could think about was the Doctor sleeping in the other room and how he would much rather be holding him then dealing with rift reports. He was startled though from his thoughts as he heard a loud crash.

"Jack ow," The Doctor called out. Jack sprinted to the Doctor's room. He opened the door carefully, in case the Doctor was behind it and turned on the light. His heart stopped for a moment as he saw the Doctor laying on the floor tangled in his walker. Jack moved quickly to his side.

"Are you hurt?" Jack asked as he tried to figure out the best way to move the walker. The Doctor nodded and Jack's heart sunk more. "Where?"

"Ahm," The Doctor answered him.

"You're arm?" Jack clarified.

"Yes," The Doctor replied. Jack looked closer and saw that the Doctor's arm was trapped between the walker and the floor. The Doctor was laying slightly on it causing the walker to press his arm into the floor.

"How did you manage that?" Jack wondered. The Doctor shrugged his free shoulder. Very gently Jack helped the Doctor to stand with one arm, while pulling the walker up with the other. The Doctor pulled his arm out of where it had gone between the two bars and glared at the walker. Jack helped him to sit on his bed so that he could examine his arm.

"No mo-mo-mo-re," The Doctor informed Jack as he kicked at the walker.

"I am sorry you fell but you need the walker still," Jack answered him. He felt along the Doctor's arm. The Doctor cried out when he got to the spot the walker had dug in, but besides a bruise that was beginning to form everything looked to be fine with his arm. He kissed the darkening skin softly. "Feeling better now you are not laying on the walker?"

"Yes," The Doctor responded. He had started himself more then anything when he had misjudged the distance to grab the walker and fell. He was just happy that it was still early enough that it was only Jack in the hub. If the others would have rushed into his room as well he probably would have regenerated out of embarrassment.

"Let's get you cleaned up and then I will make you breakfast," Jack told him. The Doctor nodded settling back to begin the process of getting ready for his day. He hoped Jack was up to carrying him or his wheelchair was close because he was not going to use the walker again.


	16. Chapter 16

After the Doctor had been dressed for the day, Jack left him laying on his bed as he moved the walker into position again. He saw the look on the Doctor's face at the walker, but he wasn't going to let him stop using it. The Doctor needed to get on his own feet again and the walker was helping him to accomplish that, regardless of whether or not he was upset because he tripped over it.

"Jack," The Doctor snipped at Jack as he pointed towards his wheel chair.

"No, you need to use the walker. Now I know you are afraid of falling again, but I am going to be right here beside you," Jack reassured him. The Doctor put his arms down and turned his to the side, refusing to look at Jack. "Fine stay in bed. I will have a nice cuppa as well as bacon butty waiting for you when you finally decide to get up. If you need me call me and I will come and help you." With that Jack left the room leaving the Doctor to his own devices.

It wasn't long after that he heard the familiar thunk of the walker followed by the shuffle of the Doctor's feet. The Doctor made his way slowly and unhappily out into the hub. He bi-passed his normal spot, in favor of sitting in Tosh's work station so that he could review her work on the rift. Jack let him look for awhile please that he had come out of the room on his own with little argument. He made the Doctor's promised bacon butty and tea, bringing them down to him.

"What are you doing?" Jack asked when he approached the computer to find the Doctor erasing large chunks of Tosh's work.

"It's wrong," The Doctor typed on the computer before erasing that too. He erased a few more things before Jack grabbed the back of the chair, wheeling him away from the computer. For the second time in an hour the Oncoming Storm glared up at him.

"Tell me what is wrong with it and that we still have a copy of the previous work, then I will let you continue," Jack stated as calmly as he could. The Doctor opened his mouth pointing to it with a glare on his face still. "I will get your computer. Just wait here a moment."

"You are only accounting for the rift opening in one place. My mouth may not work but my brain still does Jack," The Doctor informed Jack as soon as he had his computer.

"I never said it didn't," Jack told him, slightly confused.

"You sure as hell act like I can't think sometimes. Do you want me to sit here and do nothing?" The Doctor huffed at him.

"No.." Jack started to say.

"Then let me work." The Doctor was tempted to throw the computer aside but he needed it. So instead he sat it on his lap, and used his feet to try to push himself back to the computer.

"I never meant to make you feel like I don't trust you, because I do," Jack informed the Doctor. The Doctor made a rude noise with his mouth not stopping trying to move himself but not making any progress either. Jack helped him over to the computer again before leaving him be for a little while. The Doctor needed to feel useful and if working on the rift helped him, Jack was willing to let him. When Tosh arrived for work she sat down on the computer next to hers after a small warning to just let the Doctor be. It wasn't until Martha arrived that Jack went over to the Doctor to get him off the computer.

"Find a stopping place, Martha is here," Jack told him softly. The Doctor huffed at Jack. He was in the middle of an equation and while he could remember the equation usually he wasn't sure at the moment. Still he was surprised when Jack didn't force him away from the computer and instead let him keep going for almost a half an hour. He read and then reread the calculation to make sure he had it right before backing away.

"Ready?" Martha asked him. He nodded at her. "All right. I want you to use the walker to go to the medical room so I can see how well you are moving with it."

"K," He told her. He stood up shakily. He still wasn't good at getting up from a chair into the walker but he managed it. Moving slowly at first he made his way across the hub into the medical room like she asked. Once there Jack helped him up on the bed. She began her normal examination of him stopping at the bruise on his arm. It was now a deep black from where the walker had landed.

"How did you get this bruise," she asked in concern.

"He fell this morning, trapping his arm between the walker and the floor," Jack explained. Martha nodded, continuing the examination. Once she was done she asked Jack to get the Doctor's computer so that she could speak with him. "Would you mind if I talked to the Doctor in private for a moment?"

"Not at all. I will be in the hub," Jack informed them. He kissed the Doctor on the head before going out into the hub.

"First things first I want to let you know that nothing that you say to me within this room leaves this room. Is that understood?" The Doctor nodded. "Good now I have to ask. Did Jack cause the bruise on your arm?" Martha questioned him.

"No, I really did fall," The Doctor answer. He looked at the bruise and could see how she thought it looked as though someone grabbed his arm. Still the thought that it was Jack was preposterous. He didn't believe Jack would ever hurt him on purpose.

"How are you feeling?" Martha asked and he shrugged. "Are the pills helping?"

"Some," He answered her.

"Do you still want to die?" She wondered seriously. He looked down as he nodded. He still thought about regenerating and the best way to go about it. One of the only reasons he didn't try again is because he would end up at UNIT under lock and key if he did. He couldn't stand the thought of being helped to dress and bathe by a complete stranger. He also cared about and didn't want to leave Jack.

"I won't try again," He promised her.

"But you still think that regeneration is the best option?" She questioned him.

"Yes," He answered.

"It will get easier. You just have to continue to give the pills time. I also am going to suggest that you speak to a psychiatrist who will be able to help you," Martha tried.

"I don't want a psychiatrist. I have Jack," The Doctor told her. He really didn't see why he needed a psychiatrist when Jack was there to talk to whenever he needed him.

"You do. I suggest you actually talk to him. Use the keyboard and your voice but talk to him or I am going to bring the psychiatrist in," Martha warned him. He made a face at her.

"Now while you were working Jack and I were talking about your twice weekly check-ups. They have more been for Jack's peace of mind then necessity these last few months. I am willing to cut down how much I see you to one every few weeks unless something comes up as long as you continue to work at walking and talking. Is that understood?"

"Yes," The Doctor answered Martha as he sighed with relief. He looked forward to being poked all the time. With their appointment finished he made his way back to the computer. He still had work to do. He didn't notice that Martha didn't leave right away. Instead she stood and watched the Doctor head to the computer. Jack met with him on the way. She watched as he kissed the Doctor on the cheek and the Doctor leaned slightly into his touch for a moment. Jack helped him to sit down at the computer, pulling up the Doctor's work once more. He was talking to the Doctor softly but she couldn't hear what he was saying from where she stood. The Doctor leaned forward putting his lips against Jack's for just a moment with a smile on his face. Martha smiled as well but she had seen enough to know that just talking with Jack wasn't going to work. They had given into their feelings for each other. While that was a good thing, she also knew the Doctor probably hadn't told Jack he wanted to regenerate still out of fear of losing Jack.

Martha turned and went back into the medical room. She headed towards the door that sat to the right of the room. Behind the door was the small lab that Torchwood three had as well as Owen's office. Though the Doctor didn't need her as much anymore, he still needed help getting back on his feet. Owen wasn't a trained psychiatrist but he was good at talking to people when he want to. Martha hoped to try to convince him to sit down with the Doctor a few times a week as she didn't know who else she could ask. Jack was to close to the Doctor, she was his medical doctor and any regular psychiatrist would think he was insane once time travel, regeneration or not being human was mentioned. Without being able to talk comfortably about whatever he needed to, there was little point in having him talk to anyone. Raising her hand she knocked on the door.

"Come in," Owen called out from within. She opened the door. Owen was sitting at one of the small tables in the lab hunched over a microscope. His paperwork was spread everywhere as he was the only one who ever used the lab.

"Can I talk to you for a moment?" Martha questioned, not wanting to interrupt his work if he was in the middle of something important.

"Just one moment," Owen answered. Martha waited as he finished what he was doing at the microscope, making notations on the paper beside him. Finishing he turned to face her. "What do you need?"

"I was wondering if you would be able to talk to the Doctor a few hours a week. He is having a hard time with getting to his feet and dealing with everything that has happened to him," Martha explained.

"And he is contemplating suicide again," Owen concluded. Martha didn't deny it but she didn't answer him either.

"I am going to only becoming by once every three weeks now, other wise I would talk to him when I came for his exams. But I want to make sure that he does talk to someone that he can trust," Martha continued. Owen thought about it for a moment.

"Sure," He answered.

"Thank you," Martha resisted the temptation to give him a hug as she head out into the hub. She went over to where the Doctor and Jack were sitting, working hard on calculations that she didn't understand.

"Did you need something Martha?" Jack questioned. He was actually surprised that she was still there as he thought she had left over ten minutes ago.

"I wanted the Doctor and you to know that I have asked Owen to speak to him on a professional level. I know you two talk but I feel it will be beneficial for the Doctor to have a third party that he can speak with as he needs to," Martha explained to them. The Doctor made a face.

"I told you I have Jack," He complained at her using his computer.

"I know, but I want you to also have someone you can talk to who doesn't know everything. Who can help you rationalize what happened without judgment," Martha told him.

"Fine," The Doctor sighed. He didn't necessarily like it, but Martha was right. He needed someone he could tell that he was still thinking of regenerating without them rushing him off to Torchwood. Jack loved him too much to step back and allow him to talk freely. Still he could also sit there quietly and not say a word at all.

"Do you think that him talking to Owen is for the best?" Jack questioned her sounding slightly hurt.

"I do. I also think that you need to find someone that you can talk to Jack," Martha explained. Jack nodded. He agreed with her he needed someone to talk to that wasn't part of Torchwood or anyone else that he had become involved with during the years. The hard part was finding time to look while he cared for the Doctor. Still that was an excuse because he too hated psychiatrist.

"I'm fine," He replied using the Doctor's old lie. Martha shook her head. There was only so much she could do. Jack turned back to the Doctor. "So when do you want to start your sessions with Owen."

"Never," The Doctor replied cheekily.

"I'll make sure he pencils you in," Martha tutted. She had heard and seen how stubborn the Time Lord could be. If only he would use that stubbornness to get back on his own feet again. 

-DW-

After his lunch, the Doctor went to bed like normal. He didn't sleep though. Instead he laid there staring up at the ceiling for a while. Truthfully he was afraid to sleep as the faceless man was making appearances more often in his dreams. Part of him just wanted to face Ianto so that he could put a face to the man who haunted his sleep. The other part of him was terrified to see the man who had caused his mind to retreat from his body. One thing was for sure though, he wasn't going to face the man when he couldn't even walk without a frame.

Sitting up, he swung his legs over the side of the bed. He didn't reach for his frame as he put his feet on the floor. He managed to stand upright for a moment on his own before he felt as though he was going to fall. He put his hands down as he half fell onto the bed. He sat there for a moment before trying again. He determinedly pushed himself up on to his feet. He didn't even manage to balance before stumbling forward. He got to the wall, putting his hands out to hold himself up against it. It took a moment but when he didn't fall he cautiously moved closer to the wall, straightening himself up. Proud that he had managed to stand on his own, he began to cautiously move around his room, keeping one hand on the wall at all times.

He didn't know how long he had been walking along the wall when the door to his room opened. He had planned to be back in bed before Jack came to check on him but he had missed the opportunity. Jack though just looked surprised to see him standing up without the frame.

"What are you doing?" Jack asked him curiously. The Doctor rolled his eyes. Removing his hand from the wall, he stumbled the few steps to his bed. Jack hurried closer to him, ready to catch him if he fell. The Doctor though managed to stay upright until he got to the bed. He balanced himself as he turned around and sat down.

"I was practicing walking," The Doctor answered as soon as he had his computer again.

"I could see that, but if you aren't going to use the frame you really should have help. At least until you are steady enough to walk without help on a regular basis," Jack continued before the Doctor could protest. He sat down beside the Doctor, wrapping an arm around him. "I am proud of the progress you are making though."

"It is not enough," The Doctor complained.

"It may not seem like a lot, but I have stood by your side for the last two years. The amount of progress that you have made is fantastic," Jack told him. The Doctor smiled at that. Jack pulled him closer, kissing him on the top of the head. "Owen wants to have his first session with you tomorrow morning. Then afterwards you and I can go out to lunch. There is a nice cafe that you will like a short distance away."

"That sounds nice. I don't want to talk to Owen though," The Doctor informed Jack.

"I know, but I agree with Martha. You need to be able to talk to someone without worrying what they will think," Jack told him.

"I talk to you," The Doctor replied.

"Not about everything. Like you haven't told me that you still want to regenerate," Jack answered him. He looked the Doctor in the eyes and saw the worry in them.

"Martha told you?" The Doctor asked slightly upset. Martha had swore what they discussed was between them and he had trusted her.

"No I know you Doctor. I saw the way you looked at the knife the other day when I was cutting up our lunch. You were wondering if you could sneak it past me with out me noticing. I know you are still confused and hurting over what happened to you. The pills and talking will help but it takes time. In the mean time we need to start pushing what you can do while making sure not to wear you out too much," Jack informed him. He lightly fingered the Doctor's wrist as he spoke. The Doctor leaned into Jack, pressing their mouths together. He had been so worried Jack was going to reject him for still wanting to regenerate that he felt as though he couldn't talk to him. Jack had understood though and still loved him. Jack kissed him back softly at first before opening his mouth slightly to let the Doctor explore it with his tongue. The Doctor was the one to break the kiss after a moment with a sigh.

"I won't try to regenerate again," he promised Jack.

"Good, because I still have to learn this body before you change again. Then when you do change, I will have a new body to map out," Jack flirted slightly.

"Jack," The Doctor rolled his name with a smile. He leaned in once more kissing Jack. He tensed slightly as Jack rubbed his hands down his back, settling them on his lower back. He was worried that he had encouraged Jack into something he wasn't ready for. Jack though made no attempt to move his hands any lower or do anything besides kiss the Doctor back. The kissing was nice, it made him wish he could offer more to Jack, but even the thought of sleeping with Jack made him tremble in fear. In his mind he could see the faceless man lurking, taunting him for wanting Jack to be his lover. He didn't realize that Jack had stopped kissing him, until he felt Jack's forehead against his.

"I'm so sorry," Jack apologized as the Doctor continued to tremble. The Doctor didn't answer him, as he moved his head. He leaned into Jack placing his head on Jack's shoulder for comfort. Jack wrapped his arms tightly around the Doctor as they continued to sit on the edge of the bed. He didn't dare move because as long as the Doctor had his face hidden, he couldn't see the tears that were rolling down his own cheeks.

-DW-

Time passed. Jack was surprised how quickly time went as he was always busy. Not only did he have the Doctor to take care of but the rift had been acting up again sending out artifacts. With the Doctor doing better, he was no longer taking a back seat and left the Doctor at the hub with Gwen or Owen on more than one occasion. The Doctor didn't mind as he was no longer afraid to be around them alone. He was able to think clearly enough again that he enjoyed their company. He was also making a lot of progress on getting back on his feet.

Jack was proud of how far the Doctor had come, but his heart still broke one morning when he came out of his room to find the Doctor had made his own tea. He no longer needed the walker to get around and had made his way to Tosh's workstation without any help. It was only going to be a matter of time before the Doctor left him for good again. Jack loved the Doctor and would support him no matter what decision was made, but his life had revolved around the Doctor for over two years now. He didn't want to go back to a life where he didn't get to talk to the Doctor every day. Where he couldn't kiss him just because he loved him or hold him at night. He hadn't pushed their relationship further than kissing since the night they both broke down and cried. Part of him wanted to. but another part was afraid he would scare the Doctor off forever if he did.

"Good morning Doctor," Jack said happily as he entered the room. The Doctor didn't answer him right away as he had a coughing fit first. He had sounded congested the last few days and now he was coughing. Jack was worried that he was getting sick since the Doctor was normally healthy. He was going to have to bring Martha down from UNIT to check on the Doctor.

"Morning," The Doctor answered. His voice still sounded slightly slurred, but he no longer need the computer to get his basic thought across. He still kept it with him though as he found trying to repeat or explain himself was frustrating. Jack could usually understand him, but the others on the team ran into difficulties at times. Still every day he was sounding clearer.

"Didn't make me a cup of coffee?" Jack pretended to pout. He went over kissing the Doctor quickly on the lips. As he kissed him, he brushed the Doctor's hair back with his hand. It was a gesture the Doctor liked, but Jack was checking the Doctor's temperature with his hand. The Doctor felt slightly warm to the touch.

"No," The Doctor informed him with a grin. He picked up his teacup and drank the last of it. "Since you are going."

"Cheeky," Jack laughed. He kissed the Doctor again before heading to the kitchen. He made himself a cup of coffee and then made the Doctor a cup of tea. To the tea he added extra sugar. Taking them back down, he sat down next to the Doctor handing him his. The Doctor took it, taking a sip. As he did so he narrowed his eyes at Jack. The extra sugar usually meant that something was going to happen he didn't like and Jack was trying to make up for it.

"Jack?" The Doctor asked him curiously.

"Don't worry it is nothing bad. I was just thinking that since you have been sick you should have an appointment with Owen," Jack explained.

"I don't need one," The Doctor told him. He hadn't seen Martha or Owen as a doctor except for a couple of times since they decided he didn't need twice weekly check ups anymore. He had talked to Owen as his psychiatrist once, after Owen had trapped him in the conference room. Normally though he just talked to Jack when he needed to.

"Please, sweetheart. I just want to make sure that you are getting better," Jack explained to him. He leaned forward trying to kiss the Doctor, but the Doctor turned his head slightly. Jack still kissed him softly on the cheek "I promise I will make it up to you."

"Fine," The Doctor sighed.

"Thank you," Jack responded. He moved away from the Doctor, keeping one eye on him as he went to find Owen. Owen was working away in his lab. It had been relatively slow on his end so he was mainly helping Gwen and Tosh with back paperwork and artifacts. "Would you mind giving the Doctor a check up?"

"Not at all. I was just finishing up some paperwork. When do you want to bring him in?" Owen wondered.

"The sooner the better as he is trying to sneak to his TARDIS because he thinks I am not paying attention," Jack answered Owen loud enough the Doctor could hear as well. The Doctor stopped mid-stride and crossed his arms. It wasn't like he could go anywhere anyways. Though he was allowed back on the TARDIS alone now, Jack had deadlocked the controls so he couldn't leave. A part of him hated Jack for that, but he loved him too much to hold it against him. Still he chose to ignore Jack when he gestured for him to come and instead shook his head. Owen cleaned up his work as Jack went and took the Doctor's hand. He led him down to the table in the room. The Doctor sat on it, keeping his arms crossed. Jack had to admire Owen's patients as the Doctor made it as difficult as possible for Owen to examine him. He even hummed while Owen was trying to listen to his lungs and hearts.

"I am going to take some blood to test but I am sure he just has a version of the cold Gwen had," Owen told Jack. The Doctor rolled his eyes.

"Can I go?" He asked completely ignoring what Owen said.

"After Owen takes blood," Jack answered him. He was gentle but firm as he made the Doctor uncross his arms. Owen took several vials of blood. He took one more then he thought he was going to need, mainly because he didn't want to fight the Doctor for more blood if he was wrong. As soon as the plaster was on the Doctor's arm, he was up and out of the autopsy room. Jack shook his head as he watched him go. He decided to give the Doctor a few minutes to calm down before going after him because as much as he loved him, he really didn't want to deal with a grumpy Time Lord.


	17. Chapter 17

When he went to check on the Doctor, Jack was surprised to find that he was sprawled out on his bed, rather than on the TARDIS. Jack thought he was asleep until he noticed that the Doctor's eyes were open a crack. He was watching Jack not saying a word as he analyzed him.

"I thought you would be in the TARDIS," Jack told him. He stood in the doorway looking in at the Doctor.

"What is the point? I can't go anywhere," The Doctor answered him.

"I can unlock the TARDIS after Owen analyzes the blood sample. We can take a trip to somewhere fun if you want," Jack offered trying to cheer up the Doctor. The Doctor shook his head no.

"I want to go by myself," The Doctor informed Jack. Jack hoped that his face didn't show that his heart was breaking.

"You're not ready. The universe is a dangerous place and what would happen if..." Jack started but the Doctor cut him off.

"I traveled in the TARDIS alone or with a companion ever since I left Gallifrey Jack. My body may not work the way it use to and my speech may be slurred but my mind works fine Jack and I know the dangers that are out there. I have faced them time and again and walked away. I know that you took care of me for over two years and I appreciate everything you have done. I am not a child though nor naive." The Doctor sat up as he spoke, his tone getting angrier with each word until he was practically yelling at Jack.

"I only want what is best for you," Jack told him softly.

"I understand that but trapping me here isn't what is best. There is an entire universe out there with moments that are gone and ones that haven't happened yet. I have stood on the TARDIS watching a sun be born and I was there when its time ran out. I have walked planets with species whose entire civilization rose and fell within a few hundred years. I have also stood on the furthest edges of the universe and stared into the blackness beyond. The longer I stay here the more of that I miss. Things happen for just a moment Jack and I want to see them, to remember them even if the rest of the universe doesn't," The Doctor informed him.

Jack didn't answer the Doctor right away. He understood the Doctor's feelings. He may not have been alive as long as the Doctor but he had memories of people and things that time had forgotten. His very first child had been born and then was gone before her second birthday back in the 1800's. She was only alive for what seemed like a blink of an eye in his long life. His wife couldn't handle losing her and died shortly after. Jack remembered them both as if it were only yesterday he held them in his arms. As long as he lived so did their memories and he would never forget. Just like he would never forget the Doctor even if he only got about two years with him as well. Reaching into his pocket he pulled a chain out of it. On the chain was the key to the dead lock chains that stopped the TARDIS from moving. He opened his mouth to speak but the words were lost. Instead he hung the key from the door handle as he left the room.

He stood outside of the Doctor's room, leaning against the wall. It didn't take long for the sound of the TARDIS to fill the hub. A single tear fell from Jack's eye and he fought to stop the others from following it. He prayed to whatever was out there that he hadn't just sent the man he loved to his death. That the Doctor would one day find a way to let him know that he had lived even if it wasn't in the same body. He thought about telling Owen the blood test were no longer necessary but he couldn't do it. He felt numb as he pushed himself away from the wall and went to his office. Grabbing the bottle of whiskey and a glass, he sat down at his desk. For two years his days had revolved around the Time Lord and now he was gone. Worse of all Jack had let him leave. He poured himself a glass of the amber colored liquid, downing it. It burned all the way to his stomach but at least it made him feel something.

"You knew he was like this," Jack chastised himself quietly as he took another drink. Glancing at the clock on the wall, he saw that it was nearly time for lunch. Instinctively he began planning the meal that he would make for the Doctor before he stopped himself. The Doctor wouldn't be here for lunch. He didn't have to worry about the routines anymore. He could sleep when he wanted, eat when he wanted or even have sex with a random stranger. Except he didn't want that. He had gotten use to the comfort the routine gave him. Though it drove him out of his mind with boredom somedays, it had been nice to know that there was someone who needed him. Not just to save their life and then be gone but who he could take care of because he loved them. He would get past this though. He had to. He couldn't spend the rest of eternity moping about the Time Lord who he let break his heart time and time again.

-DW-

It was nearly suppertime when the sound of the TARDIS returning reached Jack's ears. For a moment, he thought that he was just imagining it as the whiskey was making it harder and harder to think. Normally whiskey didn't have a large effect on him but this particular bottle had been laced with hyper vodka. He downed the rest of his glass and then stood. The room swayed around him and he had to grab onto the desk to steady himself. He took a deep breath and stumbled his way to the door. Heading out of his office, he slipped on the top stair and stumbled his way down them. He didn't know how but somehow he made it to the Doctor's room. Taking a deep breath, he opened the door.

The Doctor was standing in his room, trying to unbutton his suit. He was covered from head to toe in a lime green slime, but the smile on his face was larger then Jack had seen in a while. He turned at the sound of the door opening, pausing as he opened his shirt. Seeing that it was just Jack standing there he once again began to undress. He had gotten so use to Jack seeing him naked since he woke up that it didn't even bother him that Jack was standing there.

"What happened?" Jack questioned his speech slightly slurred. He wanted to rush to the Doctor and wrap his arms around him. He didn't though as he was afraid he would take them both to the ground.

"I was exploring and I found a swamp," The Doctor explained.

"Where did you go that had a swamp?" Jack asked sounding amused. As he asked though he saw a pair of eyes looking out from the TARDIS parked in the corner of the room. He reached for his gun as a large cat slinked off of it.

"Jack don't you dare," The Doctor snapped as he saw Jack's movements. Jack paused as the cat slunk over to the Doctor's side. It sat down next to the Doctor staring at Jack intently. Jack recognized the look and groaned.

"You went and found your cat," He stated. The Doctor nodded happily.

"I wanted to make sure he was alright. He is just the runt of his litter, after all." The Doctor finished undress and knelt down to scratch the Dejinshen under its chin. The cat purred loudly as it continued to watch Jack. Jack though was more focused on the Doctor's body and how he would like nothing more to put the Doctor on his knees and feel their bodies move together. He adjusted himself with a slight groan. The Doctor turned to look at him curiously. As he did he started to cough.

"How long were you away?" Jack wondered as he stepped forward to help the Doctor stand up. His body was metabolizing the alcohol quickly and he was already begging to feel a hangover starting. He pulled the Doctor to his feet, wrapping his arms around him to try to warm up the naked man as they talked.

"Only a few hours. I set the TARDIS to keep the time difference the same," The Doctor explained. He leaned into Jack enjoying the warmth that Jack provided. Jack caught his lips with his own as he did. The Doctor kissed him back for a moment before pulling away with his face scrunched in disgust. "Whiskey," He mumbled to himself.

"Sorry." Jack apologized. The Doctor hadn't liked whiskey in his other regeneration as well. He had preferred wine or no alcohol. "Let's get you cleaned up and into some dry warm clothes. Owen should still be working on your blood test and hopefully will be able to provide you with medication before you go to bed so that you can sleep easier."

"I can bathe on my own," The Doctor informed Jack. He could see the hurt in Jack's eyes at his statement. He didn't need help to bathe anymore, but it was obvious that Jack needed to help him. When he left he hadn't considered the fact that Jack would be lost without him. Yes, they loved each other and he had no plans of leaving Jack permanently. Jack obviously hadn't taken his trip hard. He could let Jack take care of him for a few hours if that reassured Jack that he was fine. "Though I could use help washing my hair."

"I will go and draw you a bath," Jack told him. He kissed the Doctor on the head before he hurried to get the water ready. He didn't want the Doctor to make his cold worse but standing in the chilly hub naked. The Doctor followed him to the bathroom a moment later. He gratefully climbed into the tub relishing in the warm water. Jack had gotten the temperature perfect for his cooler body temperature. He relaxed back as Jack grabbed the shampoo and began to lather his hair.

"I missed you," Jack informed him.

"I was only gone a few hours," The Doctor stated again. He closed his eyes as Jack massaged his scalp with his fingers.

"I know but you have been by my side every day for two years now. It was strange to have you gone even if it was just for a few hours." Jack let the shampoo sit as he grabbed a clean flannel and wet it. With gentle movements, he cleaned the green slime off the Doctor's face before moving down his body. The Doctor opened his eyes. Reached out he placed his hand on Jack's face.

"I may leave for a few hours but I will come back," The Doctor promised. Jack took his hand and kissed it before finishing cleaning the Doctor. He helped the Doctor rinse off then refilled the tub. The Doctor relaxed in the water as Jack went to lay out clean clothes for the Time Lord. When he returned to the tub the Doctor was almost asleep. Not wanting to disturb him, Jack picked him up out of the water. He carried him to his room. It was easy for him to dry off, dress and tuck in the Doctor with barely disturbing him. There was a soft knock on the door and Jack looked up to see Owen standing there.

"What did you find out?" Jack whispered as he moved to stand by Owen.

"It is just a cold. He will be just fine with rest," Owen informed Jack, his voice just as low. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small container. "These are for his cough and if he has an ointment on the TARDIS that you can put on his chest that may help him as well."

"I will ask when he wakes," Jack answered.

"If there is nothing else then I will be heading home." Jack gave Owen his leave before returning to the Doctor. Toeing his boots off he climbed up on the bed beside the Doctor. The Dejinshen had already taken the opportunity to climb up as well. It was laying on the Doctor's legs as Jack wrapped his arms around his sleeping lover.

"Oi off the bed," Jack hissed at it. The cat waved its tail back and forth slowly as it stared at Jack.

"The Dejinshen sleep in family groups. He is just doing what comes naturally," The Doctor informed Jack as he turned slightly into Jack. Jack stretched out, pulling the Time Lord into his arms. The Doctor's breathing evened out as he drifted off to sleep. Jack followed him a short time, grateful to have the Doctor once more in his arms.

-DW-

Jack awoke alone in the Doctor's bed. For a moment, he panicked that the Doctor had left him again. He turned over to see that the blue box was still standing in the corner of the room. The door was open and so Jack got out of bed heading inside. It wasn't hard to find the Doctor as he was sitting on the captain's chair. His feet were up on the console and he was stroking the head of the Dejinshen as it purred loudly. He didn't look at Jack as he got closer to him and when he spoke Jack barely heard it.

"I want to see Ianto," The Doctor whispered.

"Why?" Jack questioned. He wasn't going to tell the Doctor no, but he wanted to know his reasons for seeing the man who hurt him. Jack wasn't worried that the Doctor was going to try to hurt or kill Ianto. That wasn't the Doctor's style. Still for months he had recovered with little to no mention of the man who had caused him to be cared for.

"I am tired of dreaming about a man with no face," The Doctor told him.

"What do you mean?" Jack wondered as he leaned on the console next to the Doctor's feet.

"In my dreams, I am attacked by a man over and over. His face is blurred though and I can't tell what he looks like. I went today to explore the universe, but I ended up on the planet with the Dejinshen because I couldn't bring myself to go to a planet where they were humanoid," The Doctor admitted. Jack suddenly understood. The Doctor was afraid. He didn't know what his attacker looked like so any strange man could be him. Jack never knew that Ianto had no face in his dreams. Pushing himself away from the console he knelt down beside the Doctor.

"I can show you what he looks like," Jack informed him. The Doctor's hand was shaking as he moved it to Jack's temple. Jack grabbed it, kissing it softly. "Are you sure?"

"Yes," The Doctor replied. He sounded petrified, but he had to do this. He moved his hand to Jack's temple. Jack opened his mind to the Doctor, showing him not Ianto sitting in the cells, but one of the last times he saw Ianto before he had attacked the Doctor. The two of them had gone for dinner at a restaurant and Ianto had worn a suit and tie for the occasion. The Doctor took a deep breath, letting it out shakily as he pushed further into Jack's memories.

"Sweetheart," Jack begged as he felt the memories of the Battle for Canary warf rising.

"Please, Jack," The Doctor responded, his voice cracking. Jack moved so that he was beside the Doctor holding him tightly. He let the Doctor see Torchwood and what he had seen when he had gone looking for the Doctor. He blocked the memories though of finding the Doctor only letting the Doctor feel the horror he felt. The Doctor broke the connection laying his head against Jack. His whole body was trembling and Jack felt that if he didn't hold onto him he would shake himself right off of the chair. He held on to Jack tightly for awhile as he calmed himself down. The events of two years ago were done, he wouldn't cross his own timeline to stop them but at least he knew what happened to him. Also when he closed his eyes he didn't see a faceless man. He could see the anger on Ianto's face as he slammed him against the wall.

"Doctor," Jack questioned after awhile. "Are you alright?"

"No, but I will be," the Doctor answered. He ran his hand down Jack's chest making Jack gasp as his hand came to rest on his groin. Jack jumped up quickly, moving away from the Time Lord. The hurt in the Doctor's eyes was clear and the Doctor didn't even try to hide it as he stared up at Jack.

"You're not ready," Jack informed him.

"I am Jack. I know what happened and what he did to me. I don't want that to continue to rule my life. I want my life in the TARDIS back exploring the universe and I want you to go with me," The Doctor told Jack calmly.

"And what does that have to do with this?" Jack motioned to his groin and the Doctor rolled his eyes.

"Believe it or not I use to enjoy sex," The Doctor commented his face flush with embarrassment.

"Did you ever?" Jack wondered. The Doctor nodded.

"A few times in this body. What I am trying to say is I don't want my last memory to be a bad one. I care about you Jack," The Doctor told him. It was hard for him to have this conversation even if he knew Jack would never judge him for it. He had learned to open up to Jack over the last few months and tell him things that he had always kept to himself. He was finding that just talking was a weight off his shoulders and he was resting easier because he could tell Jack about his nightmares.

"I love you Doctor and I don't want you to hate me for giving in to you. At least think about what you are asking me to do." Jack didn't move as he ran his hands through his hair.

"I won't hate you Jack and I have thought about it. I want this," The Doctor told him firmly. Jack nodded.

"Alright," Jack agreed. He offered his hand to the Doctor and pulled him up in his arms. "Not here though. If we are going to it is going to be in a soft bed with you in my arms. Not on the floor of the TARDIS." He led the Doctor into the corridors. There were several doors but Jack kept going until he found the large oak doors of the Doctor's room. He took him into it and kissed him softly, closing the door with his foot. He didn't take the Doctor directly onto the bed but instead kissed him exploring every inch of his mouth first. He stripped the Doctor's clothes off and then helped him to lay down on the bed. The Doctor trembled violently but still Jack didn't touch him ran his hands down the Doctor's back massaging his sore muscles.

"Jack," The Doctor moaned, as he relaxed into the bed. He didn't want this by falling asleep, but Jack was making that a very real possibility. Jack massaged down the back of his legs before kissing his way back up his body.

"Turn over," Jack whispered in his ear. He groaned as Jack helped him turn over onto his back. Jack smiled as he massaged the Doctor's chest, watching the Doctor practically melt into the bed. Once he had reached the Doctor's feet again, he kissed back up his body once more. He kept his movements slow and tender with the Doctor, not once removing his hands from his body. He wanted the Doctor aware at all times what was happening. It seemed like hours before he finally moved so that he was between the Doctor's legs. He held them up, staring into the Doctor's eyes as he pushed into his body the Doctor tensed. He grabbed Jack's arm tightly, squeezing his eyes shut.

"Look at me sweetheart," Jack whispered not liking the pain that crossed the Doctor's face. The Doctor opened his eyes slowly looking up at Jack. He didn't look away as their bodies moved as one. Jack was determined to make the Doctor feel good and made him find his release first. He continued to move slowly and the Doctor was near his second release before Jack fell over the edge. He then brought the Doctor over again before collapsing down beside him. He pulled the Doctor into his arms holding him tightly. The Doctor curled into him.

"Thank you," He whispered, kissing Jack's neck. Jack pulled him closer, making sure not to make the Doctor feel restrained. They laid in each other's arms quietly for a while. Jack had thought the Doctor fell asleep so he was surprised when the Doctor spoke again.

"I want to travel again Jack and I want you to go with me," The Doctor said.

"I can't just give up my life at Torchwood," Jack answered him. He pulled away enough so that he could look the Doctor in the eyes.

"I know. We can make it work Jack. We can travel the universe and you will still be here in time for work in the morning. I would feel safer knowing that you were with me," The Doctor informed him. Jack smiled and kissed him on top of the head.

"I will always keep you safe," Jack promised. He stood up grabbing his trousers off the floor and then handed the Doctor his own.

"Where to first?" The Doctor asked as he pulled them on.

"Show me the stars."


End file.
